J200 Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 Did all of that attitude die in the 1970s? Are we just a batch of ratings and trades? That attitude never existed in the 70's nor did at 0AD or BC or whatever. You think men in the 70's were faithful and believed in love? lol Men have always thought of women as ratings and trades since the year 0 or before the time of dinosaurs. I have heard some guys say the reason why the like strip clubs is to see something DIFFERENT than their wives. Wives like to say "Oh but I give my husband sex all the time and I look hot etc". You can be Megan Fox; if the guy has slept with you a certain amount of time you will not do it for him anymore no matter how wild you are; he will want something NEW, VARIETY. He might even want to try someone less attractive than you or someone overweight just because it's DIFFERENT. I always hear women saying "why does he go to strip clubs cause he has ME. I will have sex with him". The problem is that men get tired of the same thing, they want something new and exciting.
Woggle Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 God I can't read this kind of stuff anymore. Way too depressing. I will start sticking to the other forums. Are there any guys who actually look at their average women and just think: "wow she's so pretty, I am so lucky and I am going to treat her with so much respect and not ever let her question whether or not she is special to me." Did all of that attitude die in the 1970s? Are we just a batch of ratings and trades? There are men like that and they are the men who women are no longer attracted to and are bored with. When some women find a man like this she gets bored with him and has an affair with the jerk who couldn't care less about her.
dreamingoftigers Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 There are men like that and they are the men who women are no longer attracted to and are bored with. When some women find a man like this she gets bored with him and has an affair with the jerk who couldn't care less about her. I had an ex that I thought was like that (we were only together 2.5 years so who knows what issues he might have had lurking after all). I never looked at anyone else. My H only lost my attention when I stopped feeling like I couldn't go out in public with him staring down other girls. Once he had the sexual addiction label he ran with it. I wasn't very often attracted to any other men, often the thought of having any man started to make me feel naseous because clearly I didn't make the cut. Any man that I had the remotest attraction to were actually the guys who would have a normal conversation with me and it made me remember what that felt like just to be normal. It wasn't even a sexual attraction, I just remember wishing that I could just sit and talk to a nice normal guy without him sitting there looking at me thinking that my vagina probably isn't as tight as 18 year old whoever on the laptop. I suspect that there won't be another man in my bed that is good, bad or indifferent for probably at least a couple of years. Then it will be at a snail's pace.
snug.bunny Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 Women don't get like that; they are just laughing at the male strippers. Most are, but some women go bonkers over it and some women will hit on the male strippers and come on to them, grabbing their peckers in front of everyone and flashing their boobies. I came across this show on Showtime the other night and it was a bit shocking, I guess because the roles are completely reversed, and not that woman aren't sexual creatures as well, it's just that we usually see men seeking out this type of entertainment, versus females. http://thestir.cafemom.com/love_sex/118719/showtimes_gigolos_is_the_all
thatdog Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 IMO strip clubs should be looked at just like porn/alcohol/gambling/etc. Socially acceptable vices that 99% of people have occasional fun with but 1% get addicted to or take things too far. I go to strip clubs very rarely (probably a couple of times per year, mostly for bachelor parties). I really enjoy it when I go but it's just the general atmosphere of being in a place like that with a bunch of mates. TBH I might be weird but i find watching the girls on stage actually reinforces my feelings for my gf. Every girl that comes on we will sit there and kinda rate her, but I always find something wrong which makes me think 'well my gf doesn't have that problem so she's obviously better' . That said, watching the dancing is still fun and not all of us have an SO that can/will dance for us at home. I think it's also the comeraderie of the 'virtual pickup'. Most girls and guys like to gossip. when you are at a pub and someone hits on your friend or if you hear your friend went on a date most people like to talk about it and hear the 'juicy details'. At the club is similar to that. I don't get lap dances but I enjoy watching my single friends scouting the club to pick out a girl and discussing who they should choose for a dance. Or looking around and suddenly notice someone in my group went to get a beer 30 min ago and didn't come back so the rest of us start speculating on who he went with and betting on how long till he gets back. basically being in a club doesn't mean you are getting a lap dance, and guys who are single should not have a problem with getting one. if you Have a gf you either shouldn't or get clear instructions from your SO first as to whether she is cool with it.
J200 Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 Most are, but some women go bonkers over it and some women will hit on the male strippers and come on to them, grabbing their peckers in front of everyone and flashing their boobies. I came across this show on Showtime the other night and it was a bit shocking, I guess because the roles are completely reversed, and not that woman aren't sexual creatures as well, it's just that we usually see men seeking out this type of entertainment, versus females. http://thestir.cafemom.com/love_sex/118719/showtimes_gigolos_is_the_all Not shocking at all. I am single and I have always liked the thought of paying for a guy for sex because in my opinion; WHOEVER PAYS HAS THE POWER. People like to say "Hot women don't have to pay, all you have to do is walk into a bar" but when you PAY you have more power; you can tell the guy exactly what you want. Getting it for free as a woman is kind of like a sign of weakness to me but having economic power over a guy is much more significant. The guy in the article is not attractive to me but since I am single I don't mind paying for a guy that is really attractive to me, just so I can have control. If I meet a guy in a bar he can be a dick but with a gigolo he can't because I am the boss. The only thing that is holding me back is because I am paranoid and do not want to go to jail. If it was one hundred percent legal I don't mind doing it once; just for the thrill. I read that Heidi Fleiss opened a male brothel but I don't think it's operating anymore. It's illegal in America but it's probably legal in other countries.
dreamingoftigers Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 Most are, but some women go bonkers over it and some women will hit on the male strippers and come on to them, grabbing their peckers in front of everyone and flashing their boobies. I came across this show on Showtime the other night and it was a bit shocking, I guess because the roles are completely reversed, and not that woman aren't sexual creatures as well, it's just that we usually see men seeking out this type of entertainment, versus females. http://thestir.cafemom.com/love_sex/118719/showtimes_gigolos_is_the_all That's just gross and those guys are gross.:sick::sick:
dreamingoftigers Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 Not shocking at all. I am single and I have always liked the thought of paying for a guy for sex because in my opinion; WHOEVER PAYS HAS THE POWER. People like to say "Hot women don't have to pay, all you have to do is walk into a bar" but when you PAY you have more power; you can tell the guy exactly what you want. Getting it for free as a woman is kind of like a sign of weakness to me but having economic power over a guy is much more significant. The guy in the article is not attractive to me but since I am single I don't mind paying for a guy that is really attractive to me, just so I can have control. If I meet a guy in a bar he can be a dick but with a gigolo he can't because I am the boss. The only thing that is holding me back is because I am paranoid and do not want to go to jail. If it was one hundred percent legal I don't mind doing it once; just for the thrill. I read that Heidi Fleiss opened a male brothel but I don't think it's operating anymore. It's illegal in America but it's probably legal in other countries. Prostitution is legal in Nevada, there are certain stipulations but it is legal.
J200 Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 Prostitution is legal in Nevada, there are certain stipulations but it is legal. The guy would need to be hot like Taylor Lautner level hotness... I would pay for him...
nessaaa Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 I remember my ex went to a strip club and the next day came to me scared and told me about it, and I didnt care.
snug.bunny Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 The guy would need to be hot like Taylor Lautner level hotness... I would pay for him... Taylor Lautner level, but not age 19.
dreamingoftigers Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 Taylor Lautner level, but not age 19. I just saw this guy's poster up on a 12-year old's bedroom door at a client's house today. I had no clue who he was.
snug.bunny Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 I just saw this guy's poster up on a 12-year old's bedroom door at a client's house today. I had no clue who he was. I didn't either, but I was up late one night and couldn't sleep, and the only thing on was the second Twilight flick.
dreamingoftigers Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 I didn't either, but I was up late one night and couldn't sleep, and the only thing on was the second Twilight flick. Oh that's where he's from. I don't generally watch movies and I don't watch tv.
J200 Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 I like young guys; he's 19 now I think. Very mature too; I watched all his Leno and other interviews. Mature and hot. Very charismatic and intelligent; amazing personality. Amazing pecs too.
snug.bunny Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 Oh that's where he's from. I don't generally watch movies and I don't watch tv. Yes, that is where I first heard of him. I like young guys; he's 19 now I think. Very mature too; I watched all his Leno and other interviews. Mature and hot. Very charismatic and intelligent; amazing personality. Amazing pecs too. Yes he demonstrates the whole package at a young age, did you like when he giggled in this interview? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6tsQfOznTm8&feature=related
dreamingoftigers Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 I like young guys; he's 19 now I think. Very mature too; I watched all his Leno and other interviews. Mature and hot. Very charismatic and intelligent; amazing personality. Amazing pecs too. He actually strikingly reminds me of my first boyfriend, mannerisms and all.
J200 Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 Yes, that is where I first heard of him. Yes he demonstrates the whole package at a young age, did you like when he giggled in this interview? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6tsQfOznTm8&feature=related His giggles are usually high pitched and gay'ish but it's ok; i like it.
zengirl Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 I have NO issue with strip clubs in the case of, say, a buddy's bachelor party (or his own bachelor party) or something like that. (Funnily enough: My recent ex's best friend friend was gay, so he actually toughed it out at a male strip club for his buddy's special day. Hey, bonding is bonding.) I know guys who'd never just go to a strip club that will be there for events like that. Totally reasonable, in my view, though I think getting a lap dance is a bit too far. What I would have issue with is if I were dating someone and they just went to the strip club as normal recreation. They wouldn't have the same morals and values that I would, is all; he wouldn't be a guy for me.
Author tigressA Posted April 22, 2011 Author Posted April 22, 2011 It would bother me if my boyfriend frequented strip clubs, for the same reasons listed in the OP. If it was once in a blue moon for a bachelor party I'd probably be able to handle it, but if it became a regular or even semi regular thing I'd have a serious problem with it. I guess the whole issue is the money - but not simply because it's a waste. More because it's insinuating "sure, I can see you naked for free, but I really want to see someone more attractive naked, so badly in fact that I'll cough up a decent chunk of dough to do so." I know guys will say that isn't the case, but that's how it would make me feel. Porn I don't have an issue with because it is available in abundance for free and is just a remedy for horniness when your partner isn't around or for passing time when you're bored. Strip clubs are different, in my mind, due to the personal level of interaction and the monetary expense. YES. This is exactly what I mean. Also, I do believe people who say no hooking up goes on at strip clubs are naive. My brother, who I mentioned in the OP, almost hooked up with one of the dancers at the club he had gone to. He had paid for a lap dance and she took him to a private room, offering him a "discount" and all this BS--he was really surprised when he got slapped with a bill for several hundred dollars a few days later. He really thought this girl was into him. Like Woggle said, plenty of men are suckers for this stuff.
willma Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 First, I have to qualify my response. I've never been to a strip club. I've been very happily married to the love of my life for 24 years. We have a very open relationship with regards to discussing our fantasies, attractions to others, etc. We've never had anyone else, but us. It's been my observation that people that are in relatively new relationships (less than 10 years) have a tendency to be somewhat distrustful of each other, there is an element of jealousy, and mostly a lot of insecurity. There seems to be a lot of fear of loosing the relationship, so there is often the unhealthy behavior of trying to control the other's behavior, which often back-fires and they loose the relationship. I would agree some people have personality traits that would throw up a lot of red flags with regards to them interacting at a strip club, both male and female. My wife and I are not in that category, so I would totally let her go to a male strip club with her girlfriends...and have. I've seen the video. She had a lot of fun, got a lot of laughs, and came home horny. Win-win situation. I knew she was going to be put in a situation where she would have "hands-on" access to other men, but I also knew she also had enough sense not to engage in behaviors that put her at high risk for STDs. That's my wife. I can't speak for others. I think you have to be at a point in your relationship where you can have an open, honest conversation without letting jealousy and insecurity cause an arguement. If you aren't there yet, then neither of you are probably ready for the sexual temptation that is at a strip club. Tincture of time.
Jynxx Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 Also, I do believe people who say no hooking up goes on at strip clubs are naive. My brother, who I mentioned in the OP, almost hooked up with one of the dancers at the club he had gone to. Well, if there's a hundred guys in a stripclub, almost all of them hook up with a stripper. Almost guy number 1, almost guy number 2, almost guy number 3 etc Seriously, it's referred to as "the hustle" and getting good at it is what separates a stripper who makes 2k per month from one who makes 20k per month: letting a client think he's different, he has a chance to hook up if only they get to spend some time alone, which happens to be available at a very reasonable price with a big discount because she is like meh to other clients but is really into that 1 guy etc. Also the thought of licking a strippers nipples grosses me out, as does the licking candy from her snatch or whatever else is described itt. Never did it, can't remember seeing anything like that happen. Nothing but urban legends imo.
sally4sara Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 Not shocking at all. I am single and I have always liked the thought of paying for a guy for sex because in my opinion; WHOEVER PAYS HAS THE POWER. People like to say "Hot women don't have to pay, all you have to do is walk into a bar" but when you PAY you have more power; you can tell the guy exactly what you want. Getting it for free as a woman is kind of like a sign of weakness to me but having economic power over a guy is much more significant. Oh honey! You can tell a guy exactly what you want for free. Hell, there are even guys who will pay YOU (quite a bit too) to tell them what you want. I've never seen (only went to one male revue show as a viewer) women give BJs at male reviews. And I've never heard any of the male dancers who work at my agency report having received one. But it was a strict agency when it came to illegal activities. So if it was offered, they'd probably have turned it down rather than risk the agency not giving them bookings anymore. I am aware though that the guys at that agency had even more trouble with disrespectful viewers on average than the women usually did. Mostly down to the general belief that guys ALWAYS want sexual attention from any woman they can get it from. This just isn't true. Not to mention a decent portion of them were gay! But some of the female viewers believed that and would grab, pinch, spank at them, try to entice them to hook up after the show. Some would even get creepily fixated on one dancer in particular and follow them to every advertised show they would be booked for trying to get the guy as a BF. These kind of female viewers were not the majority by far, but they were always the loudest and most obnoxious group in the crowd. Mixed shows with one stage didn't do well when the men performed first. The women patrons didn't stick around if the second set was the female one and the venue would make less in alcohol sales. Plus, watching the men enjoy themselves and be crass while they waited made them ham it up and tip better for the male dancers. Security was, overall, more tolerant of them than they were when men tried to get that way with us girls. The reason for this was the security was hired by the female review dancers, and could be fired by them if they didn't do their job. They would sometimes double for the male dancers, but couldn't be fired by the male dancers. Some of the male dancers didn't feel the need for security since they were stronger than their viewers and if it came down to it could handle a freak or two on their own. Male dancers also make much less and since they were compensating security staff with a percentage of tips, they got what they could pay for. Security generally waited for the situation to get really out of control before they stepped in when they were bouncing for a male dancer.
sally4sara Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 Also the thought of licking a strippers nipples grosses me out, as does the licking candy from her snatch or whatever else is described itt. Never did it, can't remember seeing anything like that happen. Nothing but urban legends imo. Nope, this happens. One time me and 2 other girls were booked for a show at a huge clubhouse for a local celebrity's bachelor party. The amount of people we were told would be attending was seriously low balled and we didn't have adequate security for the size of the crowd. We were also not the only dancers booked; there was two there performing when we got there and they were some raunchy ass girls. Using toys on themselves and rubbing their privates with chunks of fruit from this tub of alcohol and cut up fruit. Guys would EAT THE FRUIT right after these two had rubbed in on their genitalia! And cheer each other over it. They were handsie and these two either didn't seem to mind or realized the situation was beyond whatever security they'd brought. Me and the other two flat out wanted to leave because we were not sure about the legal aspect of what was going on and the environment was unsafe. The guys tried to stop us and got progressively more aggressive as we headed for our cars. They tried to block us by circling the cars but lost the battle of chicken with our drivers and we got out of there.
tman666 Posted April 22, 2011 Posted April 22, 2011 I was going to respond to this thread yesterday, but ran out of time. Consequentially, it seems that most viewpoints have been hashed out. I will reiterate the fact that going to strip clubs does make me (as a guy) feel like a huge sucker. Most, if not all, of the girls aren't even remotely as hot as my own gf, plus, it's painfully obvious from the moment you walk through the door that you're viewed as nothing but a money tree. I think thatdog said it best when he said that 99% of the time, this kind of stuff is harmless for most people. However, it's very sad and pathetic when people take it too far or lose control. I personally would never go to a strip club alone. The only times I've been were with groups of guys in bachelor party-type settings. The focus in those kinds of environments generally tends to be more on the group, or the bachelor (i.e. humiliating him haha), the beer and the camaraderie, rather than on the girls themselves. I'm lucky that my girl views it the same way. On a side note: one of my moron friends from college tried to pay a stripper for sex in Vegas. She told him that she couldn't be seen walking out with him because of the club rules, but if he gave her the money ($1,000) and waited for her out front, she'd sneak out the back door. Guess what? He never saw her again. What a poor, sad, pathetic fool this kid was. Again, the word sucker comes to mind.
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