Timmeh Posted April 21, 2011 Posted April 21, 2011 How much time do you spend with your SO (days and hours)? How much time would you like to spend with your SO? What do you define as "needy". I'm interested to see what the answers are. I spend 1-2 days and see her for a total of 4-8 hours. I would like to see her 3 days for a total of 15 hours Needy is 5 days or more for 30+ hours and 10 + text messages a day.
Kelemort Posted April 21, 2011 Posted April 21, 2011 It depends. Is the couple living together or not? When we first started dating, probably 2 - 3 days a week for a total of 10 - 12 hours total. In the last year, that was bumped up to 5 days a week...probably 25 - 30 hours a week spent together. Then we started living together, so we see each other every day. But, he usually sees friends/goes out to do his own thing 3 nights a week or so, and I'll see friends/do my own thing. During the work week, we probably spend 1 - 2 hours a day with each other. Weekends are often spent almost entirely together, although we'll usually visit family for a few hours on at least one of those days. We do a lot of our errands during the weekends when we have more time. What's 'needy?' I think 'needy' is insisting that the s/o can't have their lives apart from you. I've seen girls cry when their boyfriend wants to go out one night alone. They'd die with 3 or 4! Just as much as I expect him to let me live my own life independently of him. This question gets tough when you live together because a lot of times I'll be writing/playing games and he's on the computer. We'll talk a bit, but we're mostly doing our own thing. Is that really 'spending time' together? I'm fine with the amount of time that we see each other - probably about 20 to 25 hours a week spent solidly on each other.
Author Timmeh Posted April 21, 2011 Author Posted April 21, 2011 It depends. Is the couple living together or not? When we first started dating, probably 2 - 3 days a week for a total of 10 - 12 hours total. In the last year, that was bumped up to 5 days a week...probably 25 - 30 hours a week spent together. Then we started living together, so we see each other every day. But, he usually sees friends/goes out to do his own thing 3 nights a week or so, and I'll see friends/do my own thing. During the work week, we probably spend 1 - 2 hours a day with each other. Weekends are often spent almost entirely together, although we'll usually visit family for a few hours on at least one of those days. We do a lot of our errands during the weekends when we have more time. What's 'needy?' I think 'needy' is insisting that the s/o can't have their lives apart from you. I've seen girls cry when their boyfriend wants to go out one night alone. They'd die with 3 or 4! Just as much as I expect him to let me live my own life independently of him. This question gets tough when you live together because a lot of times I'll be writing/playing games and he's on the computer. We'll talk a bit, but we're mostly doing our own thing. Is that really 'spending time' together? I'm fine with the amount of time that we see each other - probably about 20 to 25 hours a week spent solidly on each other. This is a great reply, and I agree with just about everything you said.
gromit Posted April 21, 2011 Posted April 21, 2011 My ex wanted to talk on the phone or on skype every day, no exceptions.. We were in a LDR (different countries) for about 3 years, let's say 450 km apart, with 2-3 weeks between visits. I found it terribly suffocating, because when I wanted to have a "weedy" night with friends, or go on a weekend climbing trip or whatever, I wanted to have that time to myself, I just need to get away from things from time to time, that's just who I am.. Then we went to live together and it all ended in tears, bladibla.. For 3 months now, I'm seeing someone new, who, I must say, I'm completely in love with. (and the other way around, it's awesome!) However, so far we never had a SINGLE chat on the phone or skype, just some practical texts (and some dirty ones, too ) and a handful of messages on FB. We try to see each other every other weekend, but sometimes we might just skip a weekend. Again, different countries, but this time only 120 km apart. (getting closer huh ) Sometimes we don't communicate at all for 3 or 4 days. She says she's got no need for it and I donn't either, so it's all good. But when we finally see each other we're at it like :bunny:, and we talk about stuff, too! I'm not sure where this is going, but I'm much more comfortable with it than with my last relationship. no pressure.
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