Perplexed81 Posted April 21, 2011 Posted April 21, 2011 This is to all you guys, who got real close and made really good friends with guys or girls associated with your ex. I have to say that I have a major flaw, one of which is to always assume the worst, even though its smoke n mirrors. I got real close to my ex's brother in law. Became like a brother to me and in turn, becuase of him, got real close to his brother and another close friend of theirs. We pretty did everything and they all took me under their wing as far as doing stuff. After the breakup, those guys that I became like family to me, unforuntely I didn't hear from for nearly the entirety of the breakup, that is.....until now. Last week, the brother in law texted me to test the waters and then after responding, called and we spent the next several hours on the phone catching up. We obviously both explained why the large lack of communication and soon found ourselves planning a somewhat reunion. Even though I tend to not through my trust out their, I have to admit it seemed very very legit. Wasn't soon after that tonite, I hear from the other friend, in which we did the same, as far as catching up, and seems like this friend and the ex soon to be brother in law have seem to have gotten together and have been speaking alot about all this catching up and now, from the looks of it, have a reunion type of gathering in the works. They both mentioned repeatdly how all the other guys have asked about me alot and seems like they all have come to the conclusion that the ex and the brother n laws wife (ex's sister) can pretty much get over it if they think that us guys aren't going to hang out and get together. I have to commend these guys comming forward like this, although i'm still a bit leary, sheds a little light on the fact that I pretty much wrote them off becuase I assumed the worst. They both mentioned that there was way too much drama going on at the beginning to initiate any contact, but it seems like the old saying, "Guys will be guys" and i'm happy to see it becuase it seems like that they've been waiting for quite sometime to go past to finally start patching the old friendships back up. Any thoughts, experience etc?
sabienne Posted April 21, 2011 Posted April 21, 2011 Agree, agree, agree! And it's not just guys. I became very close to my ex's best friends wife and another friends's gf. They called me as soon as the found out about the breakup to make sure I was doing well. They wanted to hang out on the weekend, but at the moment I am attempting to detox him totally from my life so I have told them I can't hang out just yet - no reflection on them, I just need some time to get over him before I start hearing what he's up to second hand. They said they understood completely and to call anytime I needed anything or wanted to chat. I believe them and intend on talking to them in the future. You breakup with partners - not mutual friends. They can be friends with both of you, and if they're true friends, they'll respect how hard this is for you and be there for you when it is needed.
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