Chitowngirl Posted April 20, 2011 Posted April 20, 2011 So, I went on an online date a few weeks ago. I thought the date went well; we walked on the beach and had coffee afterwards; date lasted about 2 hours. I hugged him hello, and goodbye I hugged again, and he said, "how about a kiss too" and he kissed my cheek. I never heard from him again, so I wrote him via the dating site to ask why he didn't ask me out again. I recently lost 20 lbs, so I was curious to know if I looked like my pictures or if he thought I was still fat, etc. So when he wrote back saying that we didn't have chemistry and that I was a tab bit too timid for him.. I was confused. Why did he spend 2 hours with me if there was no chemistry? What did he mean I was too timid? Was he looking for a girl to sleep with on the first date? No chemistry is understandable; but has anyone ever thought someone on the first date was too timid??????????
SmileFace Posted April 20, 2011 Posted April 20, 2011 Seriously, don't try and figure this out. You went on a date, you had a good time. If he wasn't interested, oh well. Everyone you have a good time with won't be interested. Better you found out now. On to the next one. You DO NOT want to take first dates this seriously. I have spent 6+ hours with guys on first dates. To me, we had a great connection, to him - not so much. However, I got out of the house and enjoyed myself. Enjoy yourself dating, you will find the right one. :-)
Author Chitowngirl Posted April 20, 2011 Author Posted April 20, 2011 True! I went on a first date and had a good time! Can't believe I said that..good point Seriously, don't try and figure this out. You went on a date, you had a good time. If he wasn't interested, oh well. Everyone you have a good time with won't be interested. Better you found out now. On to the next one. You DO NOT want to take first dates this seriously. I have spent 6+ hours with guys on first dates. To me, we had a great connection, to him - not so much. However, I got out of the house and enjoyed myself. Enjoy yourself dating, you will find the right one. :-)
D-Lish Posted April 20, 2011 Posted April 20, 2011 It could mean a lot of things. It could mean you were too quiet, it could mean he was looking for sex and didn't get it so he's moving to the next. I suspect that because he tried to make out with you, it's the latter reason. Regardless, please stop chasing after answers.
zengirl Posted April 20, 2011 Posted April 20, 2011 So, I went on an online date a few weeks ago. I thought the date went well; we walked on the beach and had coffee afterwards; date lasted about 2 hours. I hugged him hello, and goodbye I hugged again, and he said, "how about a kiss too" and he kissed my cheek. I never heard from him again, so I wrote him via the dating site to ask why he didn't ask me out again. I recently lost 20 lbs, so I was curious to know if I looked like my pictures or if he thought I was still fat, etc. So when he wrote back saying that we didn't have chemistry and that I was a tab bit too timid for him.. I was confused. Why did he spend 2 hours with me if there was no chemistry? What did he mean I was too timid? Was he looking for a girl to sleep with on the first date? No chemistry is understandable; but has anyone ever thought someone on the first date was too timid?????????? It's a first date so don't worry too much. Two hours isn't that long for a first date. I've been on bad/just okay dates that lasted that long. However, here's the weird red flag for me: He tried to kiss you! If he didn't feel any chemistry, why would he do that? My guess is he's a guy who moves fast (sexually) and the delayed kiss alerted him to potentially delayed sex and he wasn't really interested as that's not how he rolls. Or something to that effect. Because this part is weird.
Author Chitowngirl Posted April 20, 2011 Author Posted April 20, 2011 It's a first date so don't worry too much. Two hours isn't that long for a first date. I've been on bad/just okay dates that lasted that long. However, here's the weird red flag for me: He tried to kiss you! If he didn't feel any chemistry, why would he do that? My guess is he's a guy who moves fast (sexually) and the delayed kiss alerted him to potentially delayed sex and he wasn't really interested as that's not how he rolls. Or something to that effect. Because this part is weird. Thank you!!!! Very true...
xpaperxcutx Posted April 20, 2011 Posted April 20, 2011 I went on a first date once that lasted more than 6 hours, and all I'd gotten was the " busy" email reply. There's no point trying to figure it out because if there wasn't sexual chemistry he wouldn't have " demanded" a kiss. I rather think it isn't so much your timidness as his need to move fast as zengirl has stated. In fact, most men don't mind a shy girl, they find it adorable and enduring. Don't mind this rejection very much, you'd just lost 20 lbs. Go out, meet men and have fun.
WorldIsYours Posted April 20, 2011 Posted April 20, 2011 He probably thought u must suck in bed. LOL!!!
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