Actually, paint me a picture of a rich man?

[orangelady]

And let me guess: you have a lot of men from the states or from Europe there, where you live?

 

if you are talking about tourist about expats, probably Europe.

[orangelady]

Yeah. Figures. As many married women(or not) go to Jamaica and such places to get boinked by young, attractive men, many of these older guys are going to poor Countries to get their rocks off with women far younger and much more attractive than the women their own age.

 

Jamaica has young, attractive men? Well not really, some of them here who come here for work are successful. They only marry models or local celebrities.

[thatone]

You can say this because you HAVE it. You have money.

 

but didn't always have it. i've been poor, i've been hungry. i've had to call mom and ask her to wire me 50 bucks to help pay the light bill, and not just while i was in college.

 

yes, i have the money now, but i made the same mistakes with money that lots of people make who never had it before. i spent too much, i gambled, i let myself be taken advantage of by false 'friends'. and in overreacting to those mistakes i became too hesitant and protective of the money after cleaning up my act and missed opportunities for more that i should've taken advantage of.

 

these are lessons that everyone who winds up with 'the money' earned independently of a job wind up learning. hopefully you learn them without bankruptcy, for some it goes that far.

 

some men can't handle the pressure of having it and gamble/whore/party themselves into bankruptcy pretending to be in college again. some women can't get past that addictive shopping stage, look at these hoarder shows on TV with women in their 50s who don't know how to do anything but shop for stuff they already have, and make bigger piles of unused stuff in the spare bedroom.

 

the big point in all that was the last one. you can't tell people what the money is, or what it means. they have to experience it for themselves. that includes relationships. you don't start out on equal ground as normal healthy relationships do. you have to accept the fact that if you're together long enough, she will make some of the mistakes you've already made. you have to realize that what you give her may be small to you, but may be a big deal to her, and that can cause mixed signals. you have to make your feelings and opinions about the money known up front and early, and you have to be more critical sometimes than you would like to be in hope that she will understand that it's not an attempt to control, but an attempt to help her avoid some of those mistakes you made.

 

in short, it requires being a damned hypocrite. while i don't trust easily, i have to ask someone else to trust me based on my word alone, with the hope that she won't do the same bad things that i have already done.

 

Some advice:

 

1)Don't get married.

2)Don't cohabit with women.

3)Don't get women pregnant.

4)Don't date women for more than some months, as the state is creating more and more ways to exploit people.

 

And best of all: pretend to be poor.

 

If you don't follow my advice, you'll probably end up like those chumps I see in court, who married an equal woman, but somehow, that prenup, or that judge, decided that the woman was a victim and deserved half of your things for having had a few sessions of sex with you.

 

you can't be satisfied with dating forever just like you can't be satisfied with simply having whatever amount of money you have. at some point you will always want more.

Edited April 20, 2011 by thatone

[Jazzari]

thatone:

 

You made some good points about trust. I may be coming into alot of money in a couple years that would push me into the "rich" category.

 

I worry that if I don't find someone before then, then I will have trust issues. Do they really want me, or do they just want the money? Will people treat me differently or resent me?

 

On the flip side, will good men be intimidated by the money and not want to date because of that? My brother has dated multimillionaires and it never works because it makes him feel inferior.

 

Money is great but it sure can complicate things. Both the having and not having.

[WorldIsYours]

Blah, he is just a thug who made money through making crap music condoning violence.

 

Yup, I was waiting for the biased nigger comment.

 

Most of his business decisions were probably made by his lawyer or adviser.

 

Is that a fact or your own personal assumption because he's black.

 

Racism never dies.

[thatone]

thatone:

 

You made some good points about trust. I may be coming into alot of money in a couple years that would push me into the "rich" category.

 

I worry that if I don't find someone before then, then I will have trust issues. Do they really want me, or do they just want the money? Will people treat me differently or resent me?

 

On the flip side, will good men be intimidated by the money and not want to date because of that? My brother has dated multimillionaires and it never works because it makes him feel inferior.

 

Money is great but it sure can complicate things. Both the having and not having.

 

well, like most things i don't think there is a right or wrong answer to that. the women looking back on my 20s that i wish i had put more effort into were available at a time when i didn't have much. and they obviously didn't care at the time or i wouldn't have gotten the time of day from them then.

 

i went from paycheck to paycheck to where i'm at now over about 5 years. so also fairly quickly.

 

i wouldn't rush into trying to wind up married to someone first. being that way could cause more problems that you don't need...yet. men wouldn't know where that urge to commit was coming from, they would assume it to be desire for kids or something similar so the shock of the truth later on might not go well. especially since some of your attitudes and perceptions will change. that goes along with a change in lifestyle, there's no avoiding that.

 

along that same train of thought, would i bring up the subject in an attempt to gain favor with someone who might not be as interested as you would like them to be? no, i have also made that mistake. it doesn't ever work the way you want it to. if it does you could've gotten that far with money alone and it's a temporary sugar-daddy type relationship anyway. if they refuse the suggestion of money they think they're making you happy by showing you that they can not want the money, when they are in fact pushing an even bigger wedge into that lifestyle gap. of course these are more from the perception of men having the money, since men have that default role of provider.

 

you might find yourself completely obsessed with something other than men when the money does get there, and not want a man around at all for awhile. that's how i was. i always wanted an old house to fix up, so i got one. wound up being friends with the people i hired to help me fix the place up (none of which were women, but who could put their female acquaintances in my pool on weekends ), and was perfectly happy being single for a couple of years.

 

it's just like anything else you learn about for the first time. you will screw up some things. you will probably be taken advantage of once or twice. you will waste some of it, maybe even a lot of it. but at some point the new wears off and you wake up and realize what you really want.

 

the only thing the money really buys you is freedom. so don't throw the freedom away before you ever get it by rushing to be married first. you have to figure out on your own what you want from that freedom, and it takes a little time to sort through. if someone happens to be there when those days come around and you figure it out together, great. if not, that's ok too. while finding a person you want to be with can be a little trickier with the money in the situation, it's not impossible.

 

and hey, look on the bright side. with all of the new financial/business related things you will have to learn about and make decisions about, you will deal with a lot of successful men (CPAs, attorneys, brokers, etc). not on a BS level of trying to impress a date, on a down to brass tacks, what are we gonna do here, how are we gonna make this work business level. sound familiar? that's how men function. you'll learn more about men in your new tax bracket from managing the money than you would ever learn dating them. by the time you figure out what you want and need, you'll have game with the men who match your new lifestyle that no other women can hold a candle to.

Edited April 20, 2011 by thatone

[threebyfate]

thatone, some of what you're saying doesn't resonate true. Top 5% on $3.5M commercial property doesn't compute. Also, some of the things you're saying don't resonate true as it relates to having money and relationships.

[Art_Critic]

thatone, some of what you're saying doesn't resonate true. Top 5% on $3.5M commercial property doesn't compute. Also, some of the things you're saying don't resonate true as it relates to having money and relationships.

 

From what I understand the top 5% is between 160-175k per year

I would think he could earn that in 3.5 mil of commercial rental property...

Maybe almost double that and get in upwards of 250k of income stream out of it.. gross.. not net..

 

and honestly.. I thought it was decided that 3.5 mil wasn't that much and was only well off that you aren't rich until you have 7 mil in liquid assets.

 

and thatone is talking net worth..

 

To me.. wealth isn't just net worth.

Somebody can be worth 3.5 mil in property and not have any cash in the bank. not saying thatone doesn't have that.. I'm not using him as an example as I have no clue who he is..

To even be a millionaire today you have to have those in liquid assets.. at least the way I have always thought of wealth.

 

And Jazzari

 

When you had 2 mil.. you were rich.. but a truly rich person would have taken that 2 mil and made it 12mil in 30 years

So you were someone who WAS rich and spent it... IMO

[Nexus One]

And Jazzari

 

When you had 2 mil.. you were rich.. but a truly rich person would have taken that 2 mil and made it 12mil in 30 years

So you were someone who WAS rich and spent it... IMO

 

How do you know she spent it, she might as well have bought real estate bonds and making 9% a year from that 2M while sitting on a beach sipping a cocktail.

 

That being said, there were times that real estate bonds would yield 25% per year, back in the 80's and 90's. But those days are long gone, with 9% these days you're not even countering the real inflation number once you've paid taxes.

[threebyfate]

From what I understand the top 5% is between 160-175k per year

I would think he could earn that in 3.5 mil of commercial rental property...

Maybe almost double that and get in upwards of 250k of income stream out of it.. gross.. not net..

 

and honestly.. I thought it was decided that 3.5 mil wasn't that much and was only well off that you aren't rich until you have 7 mil in liquid assets.

 

and thatone is talking net worth..

 

To me.. wealth isn't just net worth.

Somebody can be worth 3.5 mil in property and not have any cash in the bank. not saying thatone doesn't have that.. I'm not using him as an example as I have no clue who he is..

To even be a millionaire today you have to have those in liquid assets.. at least the way I have always thought of wealth.

 

And Jazzari

 

When you had 2 mil.. you were rich.. but a truly rich person would have taken that 2 mil and made it 12mil in 30 years

So you were someone who WAS rich and spent it... IMO

No, top 5% is not between $160 - $175K unless you're talking about the very minimal cut off point. I'm looking at average AGI for the top 5% which would be multiples of the bottom cut-off point.

 

If he's only making the cut-off point, then in terms of monthly cash flow, he won't have the problems he purports to have unless he's running around telling every girl he dates what his net worth is, which is unrealized hence meaningless, especially considering the bubble nature of real estate and how commercial properties widely vary for consistent and full occupancy leasing, in the current economic climate. In most places in the U.S., it's currently a renters market.

[Art_Critic]

How do you know she spent it, she might as well have bought real estate bonds and making 9% a year from that 2M while sitting on a beach sipping a cocktail.

 

Isn't that still spent ?

 

She did say had.. as in past tense...

[Nexus One]

When you're wealthy and afraid that people would date you for your wealth, then the solution is simple in my opinion. Don't talk about how much you have in the bank, don't talk about your income, don't show up in an expensive car at your date, don't bring your date to your multi million dollar house/apartment, don't bring your date to expensive and exclusive restaurants, don't wear a $3000 Armani suit or expensive dress on your date. If you own a company, just mention the kind of field you work in, don't initially say you own the entire company. It's common sense really.

 

In fact nobody needs to know how much you make except you yourself and perhaps your accountant and if you're really committed to keeping it private then don't even hire an accountant and just handle your own finances and tax payments. (However if you own a company that could be complicated initially, but if you're committed, then you can figure it out.)

 

If someone likes you for you, then they'll just be as happy spending time with you on a $15 coffee date or a $25 movie date.

[Art_Critic]

When you're wealthy and afraid that people would date you for your wealth, then the solution is simple in my opinion. Don't talk about how much you have in the bank, don't talk about your income, don't show up in an expensive car at your date, don't bring your date to your multi million dollar house/apartment, don't bring your date to expensive and exclusive restaurants, don't wear a $3000 Armani suit or expensive dress on your date. If you own a company, just mention the kind of field you work in, don't initially say you own the entire company. It's common sense really.

 

In fact nobody needs to know how much you make except you yourself and perhaps your accountant and if you're really committed to keeping it private then don't even hire an accountant and just handle your own finances and tax payments. (However if you own a company that could be complicated initially, but if you're committed, then you can figure it out.)

 

If someone likes you for you, then they'll just be as happy spending time with you on a $15 coffee date or a $25 movie date.

 

Great Post....

[Nexus One]

Isn't that still spent ?

 

She did say had.. as in past tense...

 

Well technically after bonds hit their expiration date you get your entire initial investment back, but until the bond expires you yield a percentage over your investement, so technically you haven't spent the money in that case, you've invested it for a limited period of time. So the bond becomes an asset and unit of wealth until it expires, even though it's no longer liquid in that case until it expires or until you sell it. The yearly percentage that you yield however is liquid, unless you want your yield to get paid in bonds.

 

A bond is nothing more than a fancy looking piece of paper that says: I've loaned you my money, you're going to invest that money for me and make a profit, you give me a yearly percentage over my investment from that profit, when the bond expires I get my initial investment back. Whatever extra profit you make, you may keep.

 

The thing is, you have to be very careful from who you buy bonds and what they're going to invest your money into. There are however good bond companies out there that have NEVER made a loss in their entire history and always yielded profits for their bond holders. Some of those (good) companies even managed to yield customers 7% on real estate bonds during the height of the crisis, which was a real estate crisis.

 

I'm not sure the yields of the 80's and 90's will ever return though, but who knows. However I wouldn't advise anyone to buy bonds, unless they absolutely know what they're doing and exactly understand what their money is being invested in, what the risks are, who is investing it for you and what their history and track record is in regards to yields and payback. I would only trust companies that have 100% perfect track records on every aspect.

Edited April 20, 2011 by Nexus One

[Jazzari]

And Jazzari

 

When you had 2 mil.. you were rich.. but a truly rich person would have taken that 2 mil and made it 12mil in 30 years

So you were someone who WAS rich and spent it... IMO

No, I got sued due to the actions of a ex-business partner who died and couldn't be held accountable himself. It was complicated and lasted about 5 years. The lawyers got most and the rest was settled out of court. I got a modest house out of the deal and that was it. During the 5 years, I invested and tried to save not realizing I would just have to give it away. Looking back, I wish I had spent it all, lol! The other business partners didn't have to pay since they had already spent theirs.

[Jazzari]

When you're wealthy and afraid that people would date you for your wealth, then the solution is simple in my opinion. Don't talk about how much you have in the bank, don't talk about your income, don't show up in an expensive car at your date, don't bring your date to your multi million dollar house/apartment, don't bring your date to expensive and exclusive restaurants, don't wear a $3000 Armani suit or expensive dress on your date. If you own a company, just mention the kind of field you work in, don't initially say you own the entire company. It's common sense really.

 

In fact nobody needs to know how much you make except you yourself and perhaps your accountant and if you're really committed to keeping it private then don't even hire an accountant and just handle your own finances and tax payments. (However if you own a company that could be complicated initially, but if you're committed, then you can figure it out.)

 

If someone likes you for you, then they'll just be as happy spending time with you on a $15 coffee date or a $25 movie date.

Good advice.

[thatone]

No, top 5% is not between $160 - $175K unless you're talking about the very minimal cut off point. I'm looking at average AGI for the top 5% which would be multiples of the bottom cut-off point.

 

If he's only making the cut-off point, then in terms of monthly cash flow, he won't have the problems he purports to have unless he's running around telling every girl he dates what his net worth is, which is unrealized hence meaningless, especially considering the bubble nature of real estate and how commercial properties widely vary for consistent and full occupancy leasing, in the current economic climate. In most places in the U.S., it's currently a renters market.

 

about 185k a year. by 2006 numbers that's on the low end of the top 5% which cuts off around 165-170k. and yes there's debt, that's the first rule, you don't put your own money in the pot. it's all done with borrowed money. same as any apartment building, total rent - loan payment = profit. simple as that.

 

http://pubdb3.census.gov/macro/032006/hhinc/new06_000.htm

 

and it depends on where you live too. i live in a southern state (one of the poorer ones at that). people raise two kids on 50k a year in the rural areas here, and are not considered poor.

 

as for telling people, sure i tell people. i don't get overly specific, just that i'm basically a landlord and i don't have to work if i don't want to.

 

do people with regular 9-5 jobs lie to their dates about their job? no, of course not. why should i lie? especially knowing full well that the lie won't hold up for very long.

[Woggle]

I don't know if I would say 50 Cent is a business genius but Jay-Z certainly is. He is filthy rich plus married to one of the most beautiful women in the world who has her own money. That man has it made.

[threebyfate]

about 185k a year. by 2006 numbers that's on the low end of the top 5% which cuts off around 165-170k. and yes there's debt, that's the first rule, you don't put your own money in the pot. it's all done with borrowed money. same as any apartment building, total rent - loan payment = profit. simple as that.

 

http://pubdb3.census.gov/macro/032006/hhinc/new06_000.htm

 

and it depends on where you live too. i live in a southern state (one of the poorer ones at that). people raise two kids on 50k a year in the rural areas here, and are not considered poor.

 

as for telling people, sure i tell people. i don't get overly specific, just that i'm basically a landlord and i don't have to work if i don't want to.

 

do people with regular 9-5 jobs lie to their dates about their job? no, of course not. why should i lie? especially knowing full well that the lie won't hold up for very long.

Oh so you're saying that your properties are all mortgaged so they're worth $10M - $20M, instead of $2.5M (net worth less home and other investments) since we're talking about net worth, right?

[orangelady]

That works too. Make sure to wear very cheap clothes, do tell the woman if she asks you that you work as a janitor, and from there, enjoy the woman's company but don't get attached.

 

It's not for you to tell everyone what to do on here. If you're trying to sound really immature, you're doing a great job. LS is not a place for you to bash women and degrade us and express your hatred towards them. You're doing just that. It doesn't make you smart, experienced but immature.

[musemaj11]

When you're wealthy and afraid that people would date you for your wealth, then the solution is simple in my opinion. Don't talk about how much you have in the bank, don't talk about your income, don't show up in an expensive car at your date, don't bring your date to your multi million dollar house/apartment, don't bring your date to expensive and exclusive restaurants, don't wear a $3000 Armani suit or expensive dress on your date. If you own a company, just mention the kind of field you work in, don't initially say you own the entire company. It's common sense really.

 

In fact nobody needs to know how much you make except you yourself and perhaps your accountant and if you're really committed to keeping it private then don't even hire an accountant and just handle your own finances and tax payments. (However if you own a company that could be complicated initially, but if you're committed, then you can figure it out.)

 

If someone likes you for you, then they'll just be as happy spending time with you on a $15 coffee date or a $25 movie date.

Or if you are a smart man, you can use it to your advantage instead in order to lure countless women without committing to any of them.

 

Your suggestion is a great one only if you are rich and ready to settle down. I heard a story about a multimillionaire whose wife didnt know he was rich until after marriage. But then again, settling down doesnt necessarily require marriage.

 

Yup, I was waiting for the biased nigger comment.

 

Is that a fact or your own personal assumption because he's black.

 

Racism never dies.

What the hell does my comment about rap music being trash have anything to do with black people?

 

Racism is never going to die because of people like you. If anyone is racist, it is you.

 

I don't know if I would say 50 Cent is a business genius but Jay-Z certainly is. He is filthy rich plus married to one of the most beautiful women in the world who has her own money. That man has it made.

Jay-Z is indeed something else.

 

But if they ever got divorced, chances are he would still be the one taking it in the arse unless he could prove that Beyonce had sex with another man in the middle of the Times Square witnessed by thousands of people.

Edited April 21, 2011 by musemaj11

[Woggle]

What is this? If I criticize men, the men tell me that I hate men, if I criticize women, call them out on their BS, or tell men how to have a more successful sexual life with the women who really want them for who they are, not for the money they have: I suddenly hate women?

 

 

LOL

 

Honestly I think you just have a dark view of humanity. I thought I was cynical but you have me beat.

[orangelady]

Huh? What was that rant for?

 

I wonder who was ranting in the first place about women.

 

Seriously, as soon as someone stops agreeing with a person from whatever gender that is, that person hates women or men?

 

LOL

 

Yes.

[orangelady]

So you've essentially just proved that if I disagree with the person from whatever sex that person belongs to, I am either a women-hater,or a men-hater,'because I'm not helping out with the positive ego feeding, but then you tell me that I 'hate women' because the things I have said, criticizing women, affect you, because you seem to have a connected ego with the women I criticized.

 

OK....

 

Oh boy....................

 

whatever you say, okay. It's not like we're both getting married.

[orangelady]

One is by choice, the other I have no idea about.

 

We could just make up.