zlixer Posted April 18, 2011 Posted April 18, 2011 (edited) Here is my situation http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t272649/ We meet 2 days ago and then she said that she still has feelings to me and that she is comparing me with new guy, and new guy is totally different.. I'm the bad guy but he is the good guy.. I know that she is wearing rose-coloured glasses because she said she don't see any negative things in that guy.. She said that I don't have chance to get her back, because she is happy with new guy and she don't want to return just because she is very sad for me. She knows what I'm going through. She also is feeling guilty for all this and was crying, but she will not come back. Also she was feeling much better when she thought that I'm ok. She said that she will think only good things about me and will remember our relationships only with good thoughts. She also said that I should get new gf to get over it.. also she agreed to meet with me tomorrow and said that we can meet if it will be easier for me. I also tried to convince her that she is in rebound relationships, but she don't care because she has sympathy for him. Yes not love but just sympathy, she said me that.. They have had sex and he was already been in their home and meet her parents, also she was already in his home and met his parents, but she mentioned that it's too quick for her.. but she still meet with him almost every day! I want to keep contacts with her and I have a plan.. I think that the best solution in this situation would be if I would meet with her frequently and in the same time date other girls.. You will ask why? My answer is that it could cause some negative reaction from that new guy and maybe she will lose her rose-coloured glasses. Maybe even he would ask her to choose me or him. And also if I will date new girls then she would be jealous, because she said that it would probably hurt her if she would know that I'm meeting new girls, because she still has feelings to me and she is thinking about me every day. She couldn't say that she loves me, but I think it is because of rose-colored glasses. She also is meeting him very often and spend with him all his spare time. Also if I will meet new girls then I could fall in love with another girl and maybe I even would not want my ex back. What do you think? How big is my chances? Edited April 18, 2011 by zlixer
MyHeartHurtsOuch Posted April 18, 2011 Posted April 18, 2011 I think you're setting yourself up for pain.
Chi townD Posted April 18, 2011 Posted April 18, 2011 Dude, she openly admits to having sex with this guy. And you want to hang around? Why?.....because you love her..got it. Dude, you should have NO contact with this girl what so ever! Unless you still want to meet up for coffee and help her shop for shoes for her date that night. Or pick out something sexy at Victoria Secret for her new man that is SOOOO much better than you apparently. Dude, you don't need that aggravation. Cut her out of your life completely. Time to heal and move on. Delete her from your friends list on Facebook, don't answer phone calls or texts from her. Ignore them; even as tempting as they seem. Don't buy into them. She made the choice to have you out of her life and you're giving her exactly what she wants. You don't have to sit there and listen to how bad you were.
Author zlixer Posted April 18, 2011 Author Posted April 18, 2011 But she said that she will always remember our relationships with good thoughts. With my head I understand that I have to let her go, but for some reason I still love her.. But from your point of view is there a chance that she will come back?
Chi townD Posted April 18, 2011 Posted April 18, 2011 After she's told you that she's been intimate with this other guy and he's (apparently) so much better than you. Why would you WANT her back? Okay, NC can be used in several different ways but I only use it for one way. To heal and move on. Some people use it as a way for the other person to miss them. If you're hanging around her all the time, How is she gonna miss you? Personally, she told you she's never coming back. If that's the case, then full NC to heal. But, to be honest, she'll be back but ONLY to put you in the "friend zone". Believe me, you don't want that. It hurts too much especially when you still have feelings for her.
Author zlixer Posted April 18, 2011 Author Posted April 18, 2011 No she said that I was better in bed, of course it wasn't bad also with that guy, but with me it was better And she said about sex only because I asked. I wanted to know! But if I will still meet her then it wouldn't be easier? I feel better when I meet her, so maybe I don't need NC? Ok I will move on and find another girl as I said, but shouldn't I meet her frequently? Then that new guy could mess things..
Chi townD Posted April 18, 2011 Posted April 18, 2011 So, she's sleeping with this guy......BUT IT'S OKAY!!! Because she said I'm better! Really? LOL! Yeah, and size doesn't matter either.. Okay....look...I got this idea, and it's gonna sound crazy! But, hear me out...... How about cutting ties with this girl, give yourself sometime to heal and find a girl that will BLOW YOUR SOCKS OFF!!!! Then, you won't even worry about your Ex, because you'll have a girl that know how to treat her man right.
Fufu Posted April 19, 2011 Posted April 19, 2011 zlixer: She chose to leave this relationship, therefore right at this moment live your own life..it has nothing to do with her anymore because she CHOSE to walk out. Ok I will move on and find another girl as I said, but shouldn't I meet her frequently? Then that new guy could mess things.. This is being contradicting. When you said you want to move on, do actions to move on. By wanting to meet her frequently, you are for sure not going to move on because you still have romantic feelings for her. Who cares if the new guy could mess things? She chose to be with him. What's going to happen between them in the future or not, you don't have to put it into your heart anymore. Move on and seek your own happiness in life.
Author zlixer Posted April 19, 2011 Author Posted April 19, 2011 (edited) Ok then I will cancel our meeting tomorrow... but how big is the chance that she will want me back from your point of view? I don't want her back but I just want to know how big is chance that she will beg me? Edited April 19, 2011 by zlixer
Fufu Posted April 19, 2011 Posted April 19, 2011 I'm happy for you Be happy for yourself you are taking big steps to move on. This is awesome. I can't predict the chances because I really have 0 idea. However, I do can say if you continue to hold the hopes on her that she will come back, then 100% she will never come back.
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