PeteNJ89 Posted April 17, 2011 Posted April 17, 2011 Alright first post, here comes the novel. (yes im a dude so im gonna sound like a whiney bitch) Been in a relationship for 2 years, since freshman year in college. It was great, until about last year. All my friends were single and I started to wish I was too. But I loved my gf too much, she was my best friend and beautiful. This is my junior year now, and I have a house and the beginning of the year was all parties and girls around and crazy stuff. It put a strain on my relationship. We broke up a bunch of times and I always thought I could get her back. Last month, she went on vacation, with her loser friend, her ex bf and his cousin. So i was pretty pissed she would be on these double date things with this kid. Well, we were on and off but still together when she went away. She comes back, ignores me and says were over. She made out with the kid in florida, but she claims she dumped me cause i accepted some girl on facebook. Now, its been over a month, but im still depressed at times. It doesnt help my college is right in her home town. EVERYWHERE I GO i think of her. Every movie like I Love You man or tv shows makes me sad. I am fine, but then i just stop and think of all these great moments and cute things we did together. I admit, I didnt leave her alone cause i just couldnt believe it was over. My best friend of two years, one who i trusted more than anything just kicks me to the curb. It seems heartless. So, shes been hooking up with people, a lot more than me in this span. It pisses me off, I want her back so bad but she wont take me back. I look back and realize my relationship i was an jerk sometimes, and put me before her. I also smoke alot (not cigs) and now i realized this pathetic drug ruined us because i prioritized it first. I wanna change so bad and want my best friend back. Im so scared theres no one else out there, i dont wanna talk or meet new people i just want my best friend. I am fine at times, but like i said anything pops into my head and it hurts me. Ive wanted a breakup for a year but now im so alone and miserable without her, i took her for granted and will never be able to forgive myself.... can anyone help...
Hopeless Girl Posted April 17, 2011 Posted April 17, 2011 i think u guys should take a break .. u wanted a break well there u go,,, take that chance and work on urself and just have fun ...
WavingFlag Posted April 17, 2011 Posted April 17, 2011 i took her for granted and will never be able to forgive myself.... As hard as it is to hear, these break-ups are important and in some cases necessary. Had this break-up not happened, you would still be taking her for granted. I know because I am in your shoes and when I was in the relationship with my ex, I was extremely selfish and never thought she would leave me. Fast forward to now and I am sitting where you are, only I have had time to cope with it. It is going to take time for you to realize she is gone and that the relationship you thought would never end has done just that. It has ended. It is over. From experience, I would highly suggest not begging for her to come back and furthermore not suffocating her now with all your feelings. You will feel a lot of "I should have done this and I should have done that" feelings -- among others (perhaps you were selfish, perhaps you took her for granted (like you said) and perhaps you did not realize what you had until it is gone). In any case, this break-up has (or will) make you STRONGER. You will learn from this. It will be difficult to move on. At least next time you will be that much more less likely to make this same mistake again, whether it is with this same girl or another girl. You may look back at this 3 months from now and you may be ecstatic that this happened -- or, you may still be hurting. If you love this girl it WILL hurt. If it didn't, it would mean she did not mean as much to you as you have claimed she does. Maybe you just want her back because it was "comfortable". If that is the case, do yourself a favor and move on. If you truly think this is the girl for you, I would give her the time she needs to "miss you" and then try and fight for her. This is tricky because the last thing you want to do is overwhelm and pressure her. It is also tricky because people lose feelings for each other over time. However, I am going to use the banal saying, "if it is meant to be, it will be". If you two are meant to be together, it will happen, whether it is within a couple weeks or a year down the road. Good luck man.
whoknowswhattodo Posted April 18, 2011 Posted April 18, 2011 Alright first post, here comes the novel. (yes im a dude so im gonna sound like a whiney bitch) Been in a relationship for 2 years, since freshman year in college. It was great, until about last year. All my friends were single and I started to wish I was too. But I loved my gf too much, she was my best friend and beautiful. This is my junior year now, and I have a house and the beginning of the year was all parties and girls around and crazy stuff. It put a strain on my relationship. We broke up a bunch of times and I always thought I could get her back. Last month, she went on vacation, with her loser friend, her ex bf and his cousin. So i was pretty pissed she would be on these double date things with this kid. Well, we were on and off but still together when she went away. She comes back, ignores me and says were over. She made out with the kid in florida, but she claims she dumped me cause i accepted some girl on facebook. Now, its been over a month, but im still depressed at times. It doesnt help my college is right in her home town. EVERYWHERE I GO i think of her. Every movie like I Love You man or tv shows makes me sad. I am fine, but then i just stop and think of all these great moments and cute things we did together. I admit, I didnt leave her alone cause i just couldnt believe it was over. My best friend of two years, one who i trusted more than anything just kicks me to the curb. It seems heartless. So, shes been hooking up with people, a lot more than me in this span. It pisses me off, I want her back so bad but she wont take me back. I look back and realize my relationship i was an jerk sometimes, and put me before her. I also smoke alot (not cigs) and now i realized this pathetic drug ruined us because i prioritized it first. I wanna change so bad and want my best friend back. Im so scared theres no one else out there, i dont wanna talk or meet new people i just want my best friend. I am fine at times, but like i said anything pops into my head and it hurts me. Ive wanted a breakup for a year but now im so alone and miserable without her, i took her for granted and will never be able to forgive myself.... can anyone help... Idk how you have made it read my story I'm on day 5 of nc and idk what to think for all I know my ex might be dating her ex which is crushing me. I feel your pain, it feels like your other half is missing I know. Its getting real hard for me and idk what to think? If you could read my story and give some advise I would appreciate it. I feel your pain brother.
Author PeteNJ89 Posted April 18, 2011 Author Posted April 18, 2011 Its just still unbelievable, my family helped her so much. We took her to world series, vacations everything. But then she hooks up with someone and ignores me and Im wrong. Two years and all this bs love talk, its just unreal how one person can kick someone else to the side. We fought a bunch of times, but everytime I gave her the time to hear her out and never ignore her, for I still cared about her. It just shows how much she truly cared for me..
WavingFlag Posted April 18, 2011 Posted April 18, 2011 Its just still unbelievable, my family helped her so much. We took her to world series, vacations everything. But then she hooks up with someone and ignores me and Im wrong. Two years and all this bs love talk, its just unreal how one person can kick someone else to the side. We fought a bunch of times, but everytime I gave her the time to hear her out and never ignore her, for I still cared about her. It just shows how much she truly cared for me.. Sometimes resentment is the best way to move on. When you think of contacting her, just think of this post.
Hopeless Girl Posted April 18, 2011 Posted April 18, 2011 Sometimes resentment is the best way to move on. When you think of contacting her, just think of this post. agree ....
whoknowswhattodo Posted April 18, 2011 Posted April 18, 2011 Its just still unbelievable, my family helped her so much. We took her to world series, vacations everything. But then she hooks up with someone and ignores me and Im wrong. Two years and all this bs love talk, its just unreal how one person can kick someone else to the side. We fought a bunch of times, but everytime I gave her the time to hear her out and never ignore her, for I still cared about her. It just shows how much she truly cared for me.. I know exactly what you mean. I took my girl whever se wanted to go, car payments, helped her with her bills when she needed it, all the I love you's, you promise you'll alway be with me and never leave me, all the walks, picnics, and she is throwing it all away. Why, for some guy she dated she had some feelings come back. It doesn't make any since I know exactly how you feel. I personally feel so lost without her and idk what to do anymore, the fact is she left me and might be with her ex right now and that idea is killing me. He was such a looser and a jerk. I was always nice. Idk man they're crazy bit*hes.
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