confidence123 Posted April 17, 2011 Posted April 17, 2011 Hi everyone, I'm new here, but I really need some insight on a situation. I would really appreciate any input! Alright, here goes- this girl and I met earlier this year and had crushes on each other. We started dating but after a couple months, she split up with me because we weren't connecting. She couldn't see it going anywhere. She said it was so hard to get to know me, that this didn't feel like a relationship, that she always liked to be friends with the person first (to know they were compatible, we just started dating) that we were just incompatible, and that she had lost romantic interest with time. Anyways, I told her I could see it coming as I was holding back the whole time. We had agreed to take this slow, and I meant physically and emotionally, while she meant only physically. As a result, I told her I really did not open up at all (a complaint she had), because I was holding back. We barely got to know each other and I said I was unwilling to let something die without fully trying. She said maybe we could start seeing each other again after a little break, to get to know each other better as friends first before we committed more of ourselves to each other in a romantic way. Anyways, time went on and that didn't happen. We had coffee once and that was it. One day, my friend told me she was thinking of taking me to a sorority formal, but didn't want to ask because she thought I hated her and never talked to her. She also didn't want to send mixed signals because she doesn't want to be in a relationship right now. As a result, I sent her a huge message, opening up totally. Apologizing for not opening up at all, but telling her I wasn't going to take all the blame for the failure of the relationship, and explaining everything. I told her I didn't hate her, I just resented the situation. She gets back to me, explaining that she didn't want our entire relationship/ friendship to crumble, we should hang out more as friends, or even just talk and invited me to the formal as friends. We're going together and we have started talking again. She texted me one day to tell me congratulations on something and we texted back and forth for a bit. I gave her a piggyback ride at this event and there is less tension in the air. We are in the same area for a good portion of the summer, which is approaching soon and I was thinking that with the hanging out we may do, maybe we can get to know each other better and start anew? The thing is, do you guys think there is a chance for a second chance? Do you think we should even hang out during the summer? We were never friends in the first place, before dating, so why would she want to keep me around?
DenverBachelor Posted April 17, 2011 Posted April 17, 2011 No. Put your romantic energies towards a different woman because she is clearly not interested in you in a romantic way. There is no sense in you wasting your time and effort with this woman. My suggestion would be to move on and to apply what you learned while you were in a relationship with her towards your next relationship.
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