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How to determine level of attractiveness?

Saraswati57

By Saraswati57
in Self-Improvement and Personal Well-Being

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Saraswati57 Established Member

Saraswati57

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I'm a 26 year old male, and I'm stuck on this "level of attractiveness" thing. I think I've been flirted with, and have had unsolicited comments, but I have this innate shyness and I'm not sure what to think. Does anyone have any advice as to how to gauge this safely?

ericoutler New Member

ericoutler

Posted
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I think you should focus on finding your TRUE self. Who are you really?

Stop trying to "be" attractive and just be "you." Relax and enjoy your life and stop trying to please other people with your looks. You will find someone who loves you just as you are. Sure, working out and getting in shape is cool, but KNOW that you have something to offer others, right now. Today.

Darren Taylor Established Member

Darren Taylor

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Are women jumping your bones? Are women giving you their phone numbers without you asking for it? Are your female friends being asked, by women, to introduce you to them?

 

If so, you are hot. If nothing of that happens, you are average. Go to the gym and work out. Go the beach during the summer and take your shirt off. Enjoy!

 

 

At the same time, women will also be intimidated by you.

threebyfate Established Member

threebyfate

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Your level of attractiveness will be based on how responsive the opposite gender is to your approaches. If you're attempting to peg a number from a scale of 1 - 10, you're wasting your time.

Ross PK Established Member

Ross PK

Posted
Posted
I'm a 26 year old male, and I'm stuck on this "level of attractiveness" thing. I think I've been flirted with, and have had unsolicited comments, but I have this innate shyness and I'm not sure what to think. Does anyone have any advice as to how to gauge this safely?

 

What do unsolicited comments mean? And what have women done that make you think they flirted with you?

alphamale Established Member

alphamale

Posted
Posted
I'm a 26 year old male, and I'm stuck on this "level of attractiveness" thing. I think I've been flirted with, and have had unsolicited comments, but I have this innate shyness and I'm not sure what to think. Does anyone have any advice as to how to gauge this safely?

how many chicks have you slept with?

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Saraswati57 Established Member

Saraswati57

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Your level of attractiveness will be based on how responsive the opposite gender is to your approaches. If you're attempting to peg a number from a scale of 1 - 10, you're wasting your time.

 

I haven't approached a woman for dating, and usually only ask them stuff when necessary. I've had a pretty atypical upbringing. I suppose I was merely concerned with general attractiveness, if that makes sense.

 

how many chicks have you slept with?

 

None, that might seem like a red flag, but it is hard for me to talk to women around my age for dating. I'm not at all assertive like other men my age.

 

For the record, I don't have any female friends, although they've initiated conversations with me it's very hard for me to respond to them in a natural manner, I know I have very poor social skills with women but my situation seems...complicated. I'll post something more detailed tomorrow when I have time.

Edited by Saraswati57
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Saraswati57 Established Member

Saraswati57

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I've had what I deem to be very attractive females approach me (one did slip me her number without me asking). Others have done this as well, I'll have to get into more detail later.

 

I just want to say I have a very rare level of social anxiety (diagnosed), this effects my body language, speech etc. The anxiety is the reason I am asking this question in the first place.

Ginger Beer Established Member

Ginger Beer

Posted
Posted
I've had what I deem to be very attractive females approach me (one did slip me her number without me asking). Others have done this as well, I'll have to get into more detail later.

 

I just want to say I have a very rare level of social anxiety (diagnosed), this effects my body language, speech etc. The anxiety is the reason I am asking this question in the first place.

 

Same.

 

I'm a passionate, talkative and funny sort of person, but that only really comes across online. In person I'm very withdrawn and often silent. Rarely go out.

 

Obviously this isn't attractive but I try not to worry about it.

Pens55 Established Member

Pens55

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Dont worry that social anxiety is rare - you're just one of the people comfortable enough to admit it (thats a good thing).

 

I'm pretty much the same way you are - dont get too wrapped up in attractiveness.

 

Try to look at it this way: So you have trouble talking to some people, as do I. Often, when I do end up talking to these people, I realize that their personalities clash with mine (too pushy, loud, etc.). Eventually, you'll randomly end up in a convo with someone that makes it completely comfortable for you. Boom, there ya go

LeaningIntoTheMuse Established Member

LeaningIntoTheMuse

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If you're good looking, you'll get approached. If you're not, you won't.

 

Like me. I'm not good looking, therefore I don't get approached.

Ross MwcFan Established Member

Ross MwcFan

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If he's attractive, he won't need to approach. Women will approach him. So depending on how good looking the women who approach him are, that's his level of physical appeal.

 

I've never been approached in my life. I'm wondering what you think that says about me.

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Saraswati57 Established Member

Saraswati57

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Interesting responses, I was going to post in more detail, but my anxiousness extends to forum-dwelling as well, so I guess it'll have to wait.

Darren Taylor Established Member

Darren Taylor

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If you're good looking, you'll get approached. If you're not, you won't.

 

Like me. I'm not good looking, therefore I don't get approached.

 

 

You also have to put yourself out there. Even if you are good looking, if you don't put yourself into situations to meet people, the odds of you getting randomly approached are slim. Even extremely attractive women don't get approached a whole lot.

Ross MwcFan Established Member

Ross MwcFan

Posted
Posted
I've had what I deem to be very attractive females approach me (one did slip me her number without me asking). Others have done this as well, I'll have to get into more detail later.

 

I just want to say I have a very rare level of social anxiety (diagnosed), this effects my body language, speech etc. The anxiety is the reason I am asking this question in the first place.

 

FFS, why don't I ever get women doing anything like that to me? What am I, a ****ing monster or something?

  • 2 weeks later...
Datura Established Member

Datura

Posted
Posted
You also have to put yourself out there. Even if you are good looking, if you don't put yourself into situations to meet people, the odds of you getting randomly approached are slim. Even extremely attractive women don't get approached a whole lot.

 

Exactly. Not getting approached doesn't mean you are ugly, and getting approached doesn't mean you're an Aphrodite (or an Adonis).

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