azetix Posted April 15, 2011 Posted April 15, 2011 Firstly, I'd like to say hi to all users in this forum and say sorry if my english is not on the proper level. What's the point of this topic is, I want an advice: whether I should end my relationship or not. Yet seven months ago I was all alone man with dreams all revolving around having love and someone to just hug and be with. I am a very shy guy and literally... antisocial, so I tried to find love using the Internet and a date site. I was searching for a girl for many months, had few dates but the relations always broke in the end, untill one day... I just wrote her, she wrote back, we begun writing to each other and decided to see each other the very next weekend. I found out that she's never been in a relationship, never kissed a guy and even had a hug. We went to a cinema. The movie didn't really interested us, only each other. We were hugging and kissing while the movie just passed. We went into a relationship after the first date. It was beautiful - love was like a flower that just poped from a ground and easily raised. We had arguments, but they weren't serious - none lasted more than one day. But... now, after many fights I had with my girlfriend, I started thinking about ending this... I love her, she loves me, but... oh, whatever, I have made a list of adventages and disadventages in my relationship. Adventages I can have love.This is the only true relationship I've ever been in.I feel good, feel love when we meet.We have common plans for the future.She makes me feel important to someone.She is important to me. Disadventages We argue way too much often...Those are fights that have no purpose.We don't see each often.Her mother makes our relationship even harder to keep.She often ruins my plans about her by finding something - as she thinks - more important than seeing meI am jealousyShe tends to break promises she makes me.She never wants to talk about problems, always recesses talks about problemsShe does not a clear vision of her future, she doesn't know what she's gonna do after lyceum, doesn't have plans or dreams about her futureShe often makes me hurt by making decisions - that seeing her friend is more important than seeing me; it's not that I want her for myself all the time, we see each other maximum two times a week......or decides it's more important to work and make a pieces of money instead of seeing me, although she still lives with her parents, she recently turned 18 and still go to lyceumRefering to above, she doesn't challenge me mentally...And finally, making the second list didn't bring me much trouble... She recently refused few chances to see each other. It's not that she doesn't want - but she has many more important things to do. She wants to go help her mother at work to make money, her mother prohibits her seeing with me in my home becouse she recently got some many bad grades in school... Once she said she won't come cuz she has no money, and while the next meeting, she told me she spent over 60 PLN (about 30 USD) with her friend... Help me, please. I feel like in chains of making a serious decision and don't know what do do...
ludachris Posted April 15, 2011 Posted April 15, 2011 hey dude seriously need to think this over. because when i broke up with my gf i would want her back, and some of the time they wont come back because they will be afraid you will just break up with them again. kinda like the saying goes "you dont know what you got til its gone" granted i am broken up with my gf but i made the right decision by breaking up with her. you need to make sure you will make the right decision. alright the whole job thing and her making money should not be a problem for you as a couple. how old are yall? having a job is a good thing imo and you should not get mad at her for wanting to make money instead iof hanging out with you. Seeing each other 2 days a week is not too bad man. its not great but i mean if yall are still young she still has to work on herself and you still need time to work on yourself and if you see each other all the time you will have no time to work on yourselves indivisually. also, with the whole friend thing. friends are very important and if she wants to hang out with her friends you should be okay with it. why dont you go hang out with her and her friends everynow and then? One problem you are saying is that she changes plans on you often. Which is not cool if she makes plans and promises with you she needs to keep those promises. You need to talk to her about that because this is kind of a problem. With her not knowing what she wants to do with life, this could pose a problem and it also couldnt. I mean if she is pretty young well most people are confused on what they wanna do when they are younger. hell, im in college and i still have no idea what i wanna do when i graduate. Also if she is confused with what she wants to do with life why dont you help her out and be with her and maybe guide her to make a decision eventually? IMO you dont have it too bad, as long as she is being respectful to you and loving towards you. But if you are hurting in the relationship and you arent happy then you should definatly let her know and depending on how she reacts you should think about it and make a decision. communication is very important in a relationship and you are saying you are shy which poses a problem because you probably dont communicate about problems to her very well. Im shy too man and i was horrible at communicating with my ex and im not very good at communicating period. but if you like her and she is your gf you should be able to tell her anything. Again, this is all my opinion and dont make your decision based on what im saying but just think about it and listen to your gut and heart.
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