sameera Posted April 15, 2011 Posted April 15, 2011 my husband and i have been married for about two and a half years and have a 6mth old daughter. i knew him for 5 yrs prior to marriage when we were dating. n our third year of dating i cheated on him with my ex bf once- i told him about it. i regretted doing that to him and was prepared to step out of the relationship knowing i have done the wrong thing. he wanted me to stay and we ended up getting married. life is stressful with baby but i love every minute with her. my husband when very angry calls me names- bitch/whore - or will swear all at me. i hate it and hate him in those moments and need some advice. it really hurts. he apologises and it goes back to square one after that at some point. i do not want my daughter to bear witness to this as i want to be a role model for her. how on earth do i know he wont do this over and over? where and when do i draw the line and say enough? i have slapped him when he swore me before but he is very arrogant when that happens and it doesnt really help anything. please help.
Miss M Posted April 16, 2011 Posted April 16, 2011 That's crazy that he calls you those terrible names. You deserve someone that respects you and calls you beautiful. Everyone makes mistakes, but you don't need to pay for them for the rest of your life. You deserve to be happy and only you have the power to do that. I'm glad you're thinking about your daughter, if she grows up seeing him treat you that way, she will learn that it's ok and it's not.
betterdeal Posted April 16, 2011 Posted April 16, 2011 Your husband appears to lack skills in expressing himself. Have you considered counselling? I liked the book The Emotionally Abusive Relationship: How to Stop Being Abused and How to Stop Abusing which may be of interest to you both.
Author sameera Posted April 17, 2011 Author Posted April 17, 2011 my husband has always had a bit of a temper, but I am worried it will only get worse, he cannot control his anger. It does not help that it is viewed as acceptable in his family to swear etc. We have always had discussions about this and he admits he is wrong but says he cannot control it. I am at the point in my life where I dont want to end up 10 years into the marriage sublimey unhappy and subjected. It is really ironic because i am an attorney(not practising anymore) and am used to assisting people with these things. I just need to muster the strength to do what is right even if it means me being a single mum. At least no one will get hurt then.
betterdeal Posted April 17, 2011 Posted April 17, 2011 Then you must now the standard process of conflict resolution, e.g. register your complaint, serve notice, execute it.
Miss M Posted April 17, 2011 Posted April 17, 2011 I just need to muster the strength to do what is right even if it means me being a single mum. At least no one will get hurt then. Single moms rock! I'm one
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