whoknowswhattodo Posted April 15, 2011 Posted April 15, 2011 Should I delete the pictures I have with my ex and I? we broke up 2 days ago and I don't want to be a di*k... She broke up with me, she said she needed space so I'm giving it to her. Remember my last post about the ex. He still had 2 pictures of them up. So I don't know what to do again. Haha
smudge21 Posted April 15, 2011 Posted April 15, 2011 Put them somewhere out of sight for now. It's only been 2 days and you may feel regret if you delete them, or like me, not having them there may make you do stupid things like searching elsewhere for your 'fix', which in turn leads to finding stuff out you shouldn't. You can always delete them later, if you feel ready to.
betterdeal Posted April 15, 2011 Posted April 15, 2011 When you want to. Maybe also consider how much and in what way you use Facebook. I used to be quite dependent on it. I've found that using it for networking (getting in touch with friends) and sharing funny or interesting things, visiting it once or twice day to catch up on what events are coming up, read a joke or the like works best for me. Keep it light-hearted in other words. Much better than investing lots of my personal self into it. I've even deleted my relationship status, interested in status, and telephone number. I treat is as a public web site.
smudge21 Posted April 15, 2011 Posted April 15, 2011 Yeah, agree with that Betterdeal. It's used by me rarely for just the same. An easy way to stay in touch with people from far away. I don't get the whole posting about your entire life thing or putting up pictures of every night out (does anyone actually realise FB owns every picture you put up there and can use them in any way they want). Plus, when there's a break up involved it's the worse thing in the world. Nothing hurts more then seeing an ex enjoying his/herself when you're feeling like sh*t.
makelemonade1974 Posted April 15, 2011 Posted April 15, 2011 Wait a few weeks to make sure it's definitely over. If you go no contact now and stick with it, you might get back together. Once you are sure it's over, delete them. Unless you are going to stay friends or something. It's hard to compare normal breakups w/ my recent one - I want my pics deleted off my ex's page, but that's because the existence of these pics is so ridiculously incongruent with his repeated expressions of hatred towards me. It is part of your history, yes. Has she deleted the ones off of her page?
Author whoknowswhattodo Posted April 15, 2011 Author Posted April 15, 2011 Wait a few weeks to make sure it's definitely over. If you go no contact now and stick with it, you might get back together. Once you are sure it's over, delete them. Unless you are going to stay friends or something. It's hard to compare normal breakups w/ my recent one - I want my pics deleted off my ex's page, but that's because the existence of these pics is so ridiculously incongruent with his repeated expressions of hatred towards me. It is part of your history, yes. Has she deleted the ones off of her page? She deleted her whole page. Idk if she might have re-opened it and maybe blocked me? So idk... I'm still friends with a lot of her family and friends. So idk what that would make me look like? If that might push her away. I'm still in NC and its tough, I'm hopeing she will call. When do all of you think she will or if she ever will?
makelemonade1974 Posted April 15, 2011 Posted April 15, 2011 It sounds like she blocked you. If she just disappeared, then that's what it means. I don't know if she'll call or not. I'm not familiar with the "I need space" thing. I think taking a break is often a good thing when there is a lot of fighting in a relationship - I had suggested it to my ex a couple months before he dumped me. I would have done it - but set ground rules. She may be just breaking up with you and trying to make it easier on herself by saying she needs space. Give it time and wait it out. I know that's hard to swallow as we all want instant gratification, and the urge is to "fix things." You are probably in withdrawal mode because you are used to having her around. Wait a couple weeks and see if she calls. Then maybe ring her up (ONE time. ONLY once) and see if she can clarify things a bit - i.e. is it really over for good? But please, do yourself a favor and don't beg or do anything that demeans your character. If it's over, then yes, delete her pics, go no contact and take steps to heal yourself. There is no reason to leave them up, in my opinion.
lma Posted April 15, 2011 Posted April 15, 2011 Dont worry too much about it. Keep them, she will look at them... be assured about it. You will know when its over and then its upto you if you want to delete them or no.
EyeJustDontKnow Posted April 15, 2011 Posted April 15, 2011 I think the whole social networking thing and what to do with it after a breakup is going to vary from person to person. Some people are ok with leaving pics up as it is part of their life. Others cannot stand the pain of seeing somebody that they once loved and in some cases actually end up torturing themselves by revisiting it over and over. In the case of the latter I think it's healthy to do what you can to avoid it. Either way I do not think there is a one size fits all answer here.
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