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Posted

Oh for Chrissakes.

 

Guys don't tend to generate much response online dating. Just don't

  • Author
Posted
Oh for Chrissakes.

 

Guys don't tend to generate much response online dating. Just don't

 

Yeah but with my non smiling picture, I had two women contact me within about 3 or 4 days.

 

I've had the full smiling picture up for about a week and nothing.

Posted

I haven't read the whole thread, but your first instinct (not to smile) might have been right.

 

Someone posted a link, in another thread, to one of those internet dating site studies. (Can't remember which company had done it). It showed men who looked away from the camera and seemed serious got more responses than men who smiled.

 

So change the pics and see what happens. Experiment!

Posted
I haven't read the whole thread, but your first instinct (not to smile) might have been right.

 

Someone posted a link, in another thread, to one of those internet dating site studies. (Can't remember which company had done it). It showed men who looked away from the camera and seemed serious got more responses than men who smiled.

 

So change the pics and see what happens. Experiment!

 

After going through this thread, at first the suggestions seemed pretty reasonable, but...I knew as a time-line formed, the suggestions would start to back track to the way thing should've been or contradictions.

 

I had to seriously laugh, and at this point, don't even take advice from forum members here

 

 

The "Smiling" is a simple example here.

 

A lot of people suggested, "Dude, you seriously need to put a picture up of you smiling"

 

Then finally, advice, "Hmm...ummm....hmm...yeah, well, maybe you shouldn't have smiled at all."

 

This is why I don't post a profile of mine for suggestions, because eventually, peoples advice will start contradicting each other. :laugh:

 

In the end, the advice given turns out to be a "wash".

  • Author
Posted
I haven't read the whole thread, but your first instinct (not to smile) might have been right.

 

Someone posted a link, in another thread, to one of those internet dating site studies. (Can't remember which company had done it). It showed men who looked away from the camera and seemed serious got more responses than men who smiled.

 

So change the pics and see what happens. Experiment!

 

I'll eventually put up two good pics on there, one of me looking serious (and maybe not looking at the camera), and the other smiling.

Posted

Ross,

 

I hope you don't take this the wrong way but in non-smiling pics you look kind of creepy and intense, almost psycho. Your smiling pic is million times better. The two women that contacted you before were probably just a fluke.

 

If you lived closer to me I would actually meet up with you and asses how you act in person and give you some pointers and teach you how to flirt.

Posted (edited)
After going through this thread, at first the suggestions seemed pretty reasonable, but...I knew as a time-line formed, the suggestions would start to back track to the way thing should've been or contradictions.

 

I had to seriously laugh, and at this point, don't even take advice from forum members here

 

 

The "Smiling" is a simple example here.

 

A lot of people suggested, "Dude, you seriously need to put a picture up of you smiling"

 

Then finally, advice, "Hmm...ummm....hmm...yeah, well, maybe you shouldn't have smiled at all."

 

This is why I don't post a profile of mine for suggestions, because eventually, peoples advice will start contradicting each other. :laugh:

 

In the end, the advice given turns out to be a "wash".

 

 

 

In this thread - started after this one, in post 7, Darren Taylor posts a link to a study that shows men get more responses when they look away from the camera, with a confident yet not smiling look.

 

I'm not backtracking. I was presented with hard data that counters my first instincts. I do not argue with data. I would rather Ross find success and gains confidence than be right.

 

the direct link to the study: http://blog.okcupid.com/index.php/the-4-big-myths-of-profile-pictures/

 

The sample picture for "ideal" pose for men, shows a guy looking in the distance, with a confident flirtatious look. I admit, it makes me feel intrigued, like, "what's he thinking about?"

Edited by Kamille
Posted

No worries, just like with an research that is done, it changes....like with food, first a something is healthy to eat, then something is not healthy anymore.

 

Give it probably 10 years and you'll find that a man smiling is attractive to a woman.

 

In all actually, there is no real helpful data here, because "it depends on the woman".

 

Also, the data does not demonstrate that was the actual reason the woman contacted the man who wasn't smiling, if conducted their research in a manner where they interviewed each woman that emailed said men were not smiling, you'd probably get more representative data.

 

 

In this thread - started after this one, in post 7, Darren Taylor posts a link to a study that shows men get more responses when they look away from the camera, with a confident yet not smiling look.

 

I'm not backtracking. I was presented with hard data that counters my first instincts. I do not argue with data. I would rather Ross find success and gains confidence than be right.

 

the direct link to the study: http://blog.okcupid.com/index.php/the-4-big-myths-of-profile-pictures/

 

The sample picture for "ideal" pose for men, shows a guy looking in the distance, with a confident flirtatious look. I admit, it makes me feel intrigued, like, "what's he thinking about?"

Posted
Well yeah, of course I know that.

 

I was drunk and was feeling really down about my situation, so I just did it to make myself feel better (how doing that kind of thing makes me feel better, I don't know), and I was just curious about the kind of reaction I'd get.

 

I kind of just did it for a joke at the same time as well.

 

You were probably just looking for sympathy, would be my guess.

 

I wouldn't say you did it "to make yourself feel better" though. I think you did it because you were upset. Things I like doing (stuff I do to make myself feel better) don't include going on internet dating sites and posting stuff like that. Soccer is pretty fun, for example ;).

Posted

Smiling is always attractive. Or should I say genuine smiles are. Ones where your whole face lights up. You can fake smile all you want but if it makes you look creepy no one will be attracted to you.

  • Author
Posted
Ross,

 

I hope you don't take this the wrong way but in non-smiling pics you look kind of creepy and intense, almost psycho. Your smiling pic is million times better. The two women that contacted you before were probably just a fluke.

 

Is that just because of the fact of not smiling on a photo, I mean, would you think that of most guys that don't smile on their photo?

 

Or is it just something about me, like, so even in real life when I'm not smiling (I mean, no one stays smiling 100% of the time), would I still look creepy?

  • Author
Posted

Well, it's been a couple of weeks now. My (what I think is very ugly) full smiling pic is still up, and I've still not got one message from any women.

Posted
Is that just because of the fact of not smiling on a photo, I mean, would you think that of most guys that don't smile on their photo?

 

Or is it just something about me, like, so even in real life when I'm not smiling (I mean, no one stays smiling 100% of the time), would I still look creepy?

 

I think it is the look in your eyes when not smiling. It's too intense and hard. A smile softens your eyes too and you look more friendly.

 

I am not sure how you come across in real life. The way you move, walk, talk would all come into play.

  • Author
Posted
I think it is the look in your eyes when not smiling. It's too intense and hard. A smile softens your eyes too and you look more friendly.

 

I am not sure how you come across in real life. The way you move, walk, talk would all come into play.

 

A few times I've been told in real life that I have 'psycho eyes'. :(

Posted
I have been told I look like the unabomber. You are going to have to learn to ignore it.

 

 

Agreed.

 

I have been told that I have beaver teeth, and also look like a transvestite. Oh boy, people are fun! :lmao:

Posted

dude if you are depressed, you shouldn't be looking for dates on a dating site that is not a depression support group possibly? Is this fair on the women who all probably do not want to meet a guy who just wants help right now?

 

You sound like you need to work on yourself first with people who are trained and waiting to do just that. Then maybe try dating when you like yourself enough to smile naturally and say whats great about you. I am sure you have a huge heart and are a top bloke, but nobody can make you believe except you. You look perfectly normal to me, just need to get some confidence and have some fun day to day first. Get back to the dating later eh? Chin up fella!

  • Author
Posted
Agreed.

 

I have been told that I have beaver teeth, and also look like a transvestite. Oh boy, people are fun! :lmao:

 

You look all woman to me, hun.

  • Author
Posted
dude if you are depressed, you shouldn't be looking for dates on a dating site that is not a depression support group possibly? Is this fair on the women who all probably do not want to meet a guy who just wants help right now?

 

You sound like you need to work on yourself first with people who are trained and waiting to do just that. Then maybe try dating when you like yourself enough to smile naturally and say whats great about you. I am sure you have a huge heart and are a top bloke, but nobody can make you believe except you. You look perfectly normal to me, just need to get some confidence and have some fun day to day first. Get back to the dating later eh? Chin up fella!

 

I'm not actually looking for dates at the moment, because, like you said, I need to work on myself and on a couple of areas in my life first.

Posted

*facepalm*

 

One of these is obviously a lie.

 

The longest relationship Ross_MwcFan has been in was over 5 years long.

 

or

 

no woman in the whole of my life has ever shown any interest in me
Posted

This is a stupid joke -_-

Posted

 

You're obviously not trying to catch any fish with that one, but you need to point your spell checker at "stil" and probably also "Cubing".

 

You should add "Staying in" to your interests, too, for the full effect. :)

Posted

Being 5'8 on pof you might as well be a leper

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