Arikel Posted April 10, 2011 Posted April 10, 2011 Background here http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t272940/ I know it's not my fault, I know it's him and I know he won't change.. But a part of me wonders if I am over reacting.. He's just on the sites to chat... He wont actually meet anyone again. He kept reassuring me the past 2 days (right after I posted on LS, weird but I know he doesn't read this forum) that he would be loyal to me, he won't lie, he understood how I felt when he cheated (I was like huh? Why bring her up... I'm thinking he was drunk) and he would always be sorry for that... Then today when I indicated I knew he was on the dating sites... Total silence. So I figure we are done. I sent him 2 long SMS to talk and express my feelings but no reply. Can't call in case his kid is around... But yet i wonder... Am I over reacting to harmless chatting? Should I talk to him about it... Can I trust him that it won't go further that one off chats.. I don't know why he does it, I don't know what he's thinking. Yesterday he asked me to meet his daughter next Sunday. I really don't understand. Does he seriously want a relationship with me.. Or is he using his daughter to pull me in... Did he really plan to be with me or he doesn't care if his daugter sees this relationship fail? But he's a good parent to his kid.. I can't imagine him being so thoughtless with her. Part of me wonders if I am sabotaging my own relationship by bringing these issues up at an important time like this... But it's something that needs to be clear before bringing a child into the equation. I feel so lost and lonely... I want to call him and talk to him and fix this but I don't think it can be fixed. I need to be NC. I know this is not my fault but I feel guilty that I am over reacting.. I should not blame myself. It's not my fault. I must remember that
Rose T Posted April 10, 2011 Posted April 10, 2011 Arikel, if it helps, no, you're not overreacting. I read your other thread. Not only has he cheated, but he's potentially laying the ground for further cheating through the dating sites. What does "just chat" mean? Chatting is about getting to know people, other women in this case. I think you got some good replies on the other thread; I think you can do better. Be brave. Move on.
DollyGirl12 Posted April 11, 2011 Posted April 11, 2011 Hi, I'm sorry. No, you are not overreacting. Honestly, when you are involved with, and love someone, there should be ABSOLUTELY no need to still be on sites, and chatting with others. It just shows no respect at all for you.
Author Arikel Posted April 11, 2011 Author Posted April 11, 2011 And yet I really want to pick up the phone and call. I just want to hear him say he is sorry and it wont happen again. I want to be together with him again, I miss him so... But I know I wont get anything like that, and its just a dream on my part. I know he will move on asap and that I wont.. but I will eventually. So heres to staying NC ... an hour, a day at a time
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