rapter101 Posted April 9, 2011 Posted April 9, 2011 I have known this girl for many years and we have an age difference of 2 years, shes 22 im 20 and i have been friends with her since we were young and i have grown to know pretty well and she knows alot about me. we are good friends and we have alot of things in common and i have been thinking about taking things to the next level and its also been on her mind. mine and her parents are fine with us moving to the next level as her parents approve of me and same with my parents i care alot about her and i do like her, i see myself going to the next step with her but i dont want to get her hopes high as she has had a proposal from someone else who she has come to know. she has not known the guy as much and things are moving fast with them but if i were to intervene then the chances are she would pick me first. i do not love her as i have not got to know her that well and she is at the same stage as well, but my parents are saying she is right for me and i am hesitant to move to the next step. if i were to not go the next step with her then the chances are i would loose her as a friend and we wouldnt see much of each other or be able to hang out like we do as friends. shes one in a million, she is smart, pretty, intelligent and she a proper conservative person whoever i choose they will most likely end up being my life partner, but whether she is the one i am not sure. my grandma would be delighted and so would the rest of the family. but should i wait for the right person to come along as i believe there is someone out there for everyone, whether she is the one i dont know and i dont know how i feel about her now but i had feelings for her before. will i every find the right person to fall in love with first then to marry or should i take my chance with my friend who i know so much about and i see myself with her in the future years but should i get to know her better and see if i fall for her or should i think because i know her well im likely to fall in love with her. i have never fallen in love before. so what should i do thanks all
MarlyStar Posted April 9, 2011 Posted April 9, 2011 What is the 'next' step? And why oh why are you polling your family? It seems if you are discussing it with your family, you aren't ready for the next step. When you are ready for the next step, it is so chrystal clear you don't need to discuss it with mommy and daddy and grandma. She's a girl in a million, and yet you aren't in love with her because you don't know her well enough, but you've known her for years?
Author rapter101 Posted April 9, 2011 Author Posted April 9, 2011 What is the 'next' step? And why oh why are you polling your family? It seems if you are discussing it with your family, you aren't ready for the next step. When you are ready for the next step, it is so chrystal clear you don't need to discuss it with mommy and daddy and grandma. She's a girl in a million, and yet you aren't in love with her because you don't know her well enough, but you've known her for years? the next step would be to get closer to her and get into a relationship that would eventually lead to marriage. i have been discussing with the family as it is them who think i am ready, i have known her as a friend for years yet we have not been in a relationship before. we are both very shy but the family think she is the one i should start a relationship with i appreciate you replying i will try answering any questions and you can give me you verdict thanks
MarlyStar Posted April 9, 2011 Posted April 9, 2011 Where do you live? It doesn't sound like you are living in the United States, Canada, Western Europe or Australia, etc... The involvement of your family in your personal romantic life is odd for N. America and Western Europe. But if you are from the west, then my advice is to cut your family out of your romantic life and start thinking for yourself. What do YOU want? Do YOU want to get closer to her? Do YOU want to take the next step? If you aren't from the US, Canada, Australia, etc... I really can't advise you. Arranged marriages are something I have no knowledge of.
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