Mixed28 Posted April 9, 2011 Posted April 9, 2011 Guys do you just send a crap ton of messages saying "hi" or some simple message? I do
fishtaco Posted April 9, 2011 Posted April 9, 2011 Right idea, wrong follow through. You can't just send simple messages. You're supposed to send short messages that have something to do with their profile. So have a template, and glance through their profile, pick out certain key words and insert those words into the template, and then ship it out. You still want to send out as many message as you can. But anyway, this is why I don't do online dating.
hoping2heal Posted April 9, 2011 Posted April 9, 2011 Guys do you just send a crap ton of messages saying "hi" or some simple message? I do And this is likely why you don't get any responses from OKC. Honestly, if you are approaching a girl electronically, your physical self is not present and you have to find some other way to make an impression. That just seems generic and makes you look lazy which will lead to a host of other assumptions about you e.g. not employed, not educated, etc etc.
Leeway Harris Posted April 9, 2011 Posted April 9, 2011 And this is likely why you don't get any responses from OKC. Honestly, if you are approaching a girl electronically, your physical self is not present and you have to find some other way to make an impression. That just seems generic and makes you look lazy which will lead to a host of other assumptions about you e.g. not employed, not educated, etc etc. When I was using OKC, I sent thoughful, interesting messages to every woman I decided to contact, and so few of them responded that I eventually decided the whole thing was a waste of time and deleted my profile. But during the past week, I was really bored and lonely, so I went on craigslist w4m personals and replied to dozens of postings with this message: ...testing... Believe it or not, it worked. I had a date last night. Now, it was a terrible date, but I got an in-person meeting with a woman in less than a week. It took a month or more of sending nice, personalized messages to women on OkCupid to get even one of them to meet me in person. Make of that what you will.
MarlyStar Posted April 9, 2011 Posted April 9, 2011 But during the past week, I was really bored and lonely, so I went on craigslist w4m personals and replied to dozens of postings with this message: ...testing... Believe it or not, it worked. I had a date last night. Now, it was a terrible date, but I got an in-person meeting with a woman in less than a week. It took a month or more of sending nice, personalized messages to women on OkCupid to get even one of them to meet me in person. Make of that what you will. That's hilarious. How bad was the date?
Leeway Harris Posted April 9, 2011 Posted April 9, 2011 That's hilarious. How bad was the date? It wasn't the worst, but it wasn't good at all. We had talked on gchat, and on the phone for a couple of days, so it wasn't completely blind. She's really sweet, as far as I can tell. So we make plans to meet last night at 7PM. She got held up at work, so she was over an hour late, but at least she texted me to let me know. The bad part was that she had apparently had a really long day, and was really tired. So she didn't feel like talking. We walked a few blocks to the place I had decided to go, and I thought we would get acquainted along the way, but we mostly walked in silence. Very awkward. As soon as we walked into the bar, we realized it was way too crowded and loud, so we decided to try someplace else. The bouncer suggested a place across the street that was likely to be quieter, but as we were walking over there, she said "Can we maybe do this another night?" and by this time I was more than agreeable to that. So, it wasn't her fault, but the "date" didn't go well at all, to the extent that it actually happened. Plus, she had sent me some really good pictures of herself, and I guess I just wasn't as attracted to the real-life version of her. So I don't think we'll be seeing each other again. Oh well, whaddya gonna do?
Author Mixed28 Posted April 9, 2011 Author Posted April 9, 2011 When I was using OKC, I sent thoughful, interesting messages to every woman I decided to contact, and so few of them responded that I eventually decided the whole thing was a waste of time and deleted my profile. But during the past week, I was really bored and lonely, so I went on craigslist w4m personals and replied to dozens of postings with this message: ...testing... Believe it or not, it worked. I had a date last night. Now, it was a terrible date, but I got an in-person meeting with a woman in less than a week. It took a month or more of sending nice, personalized messages to women on OkCupid to get even one of them to meet me in person. Make of that what you will. The girls on there are horrid! They look like the lochness monster!
orangelady Posted April 9, 2011 Posted April 9, 2011 Guys do you just send a crap ton of messages saying "hi" or some simple message? I do you do which? I usually send a funny but simple message in one or two lines. I don't want to type a whole lengthy paragraph simply because I know men reply emails based on your photos.
orangelady Posted April 9, 2011 Posted April 9, 2011 It wasn't the worst, but it wasn't good at all. We had talked on gchat, and on the phone for a couple of days, so it wasn't completely blind. She's really sweet, as far as I can tell. So we make plans to meet last night at 7PM. She got held up at work, so she was over an hour late, but at least she texted me to let me know. The bad part was that she had apparently had a really long day, and was really tired. So she didn't feel like talking. We walked a few blocks to the place I had decided to go, and I thought we would get acquainted along the way, but we mostly walked in silence. Very awkward. As soon as we walked into the bar, we realized it was way too crowded and loud, so we decided to try someplace else. The bouncer suggested a place across the street that was likely to be quieter, but as we were walking over there, she said "Can we maybe do this another night?" and by this time I was more than agreeable to that. So, it wasn't her fault, but the "date" didn't go well at all, to the extent that it actually happened. Plus, she had sent me some really good pictures of herself, and I guess I just wasn't as attracted to the real-life version of her. So I don't think we'll be seeing each other again. Oh well, whaddya gonna do? I wonder why she acted this way. Has she seen your photos before she met you? And were your photos recent? I swear some people look so completely different from their photos vs real life.
Leeway Harris Posted April 9, 2011 Posted April 9, 2011 I wonder why she acted this way. Has she seen your photos before she met you? And were your photos recent? I swear some people look so completely different from their photos vs real life. The photos I sent her were taken in the last few weeks. And they're not great pictures, just regular webcam-like things. So she definitely knew what I looked like before we met.
orangelady Posted April 9, 2011 Posted April 9, 2011 The photos I sent her were taken in the last few weeks. And they're not great pictures, just regular webcam-like things. So she definitely knew what I looked like before we met. Hmmm that's really strange. I used to meet some men from local chatrooms many years ago and the only time when I said "I think I should be heading home now" halfway through the meeting was when I felt the guy was dishonest about himself / looks e.g like one guy said he was in his 20s but he looked at least 40. Another one where I wanted to leave so badly was because he put his hand on my belly Ughhh I don't know what her problem was but may as well forget about the whole thing and move on.
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