P&R Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 None. I weigh 210 pounds, and am 5'10". I would date someone who was the same height and weight. My point is that women don't want to date me, because I'm not good looking. If I looked like Johnny Depp, I'm sure I wouldn't have a problem dating. Women are shallow. Your attitude needs fixing. If you can't get a date it is time you take a good, hard, long look at yourself. All of your posts seem to be full of whining, and feelings of entitlement. You proceed to take out your angst on women kind in general. In reality they are not the reason why you can't get a date, YOU ARE. Judging from your post that I've read on LS, you are not ready for a relationship yet.
Kamille Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 I kind of like this thread. It's a twist on the classic : "Do men only care about looks" thread. It's definitely helping see things from a different perspective, but the conclusions are the same: Being attractive gets you the interview, your personality gets you the job. I saw the thread that perhaps prompted LIM to start this one. LIM, please abstain to make generalizations about all women based on a few threads on here. As to your plan to hit the gym and mistreat women: since participating in Disillusioned's thread on the topic, I've changed my take on it. I say, whatever reason gets you to hit the gym is a great reason. Go for it. Hit the gym. Not because it will make you hotter, but because it will make you feel better.
skydiveaddict Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 I've seen it on here so many times. A woman describes herself as attractive. But she can't get attractive men, only ugly men. Then she gets upset that men only want her for sex. Well, what do you call what you're doing? You obviously want an attractive man for sex! Very Well stated
D-Lish Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 All these programs on tv about dropping weight as if that in itself is going to make everything better. The biggest loser is a good show! We need a show called drop the attitude. Maybe they'll call it the "shrinking ass-h@le".
Author LeaningIntoTheMuse Posted April 7, 2011 Author Posted April 7, 2011 All these programs on tv about dropping weight as if that in itself is going to make everything better. The biggest loser is a good show! We need a show called drop the attitude. Maybe they'll call it the "shrinking ass-h@le". This made me laugh out loud.
Author LeaningIntoTheMuse Posted April 7, 2011 Author Posted April 7, 2011 And no, I don't hate women. Hating what people do doesn't mean I hate them, I just hate their actions. But I do admit that I tend to generalize, a lot, and that isn't good. But I've seen the same generalizations, towards men made by women, on here, and it isn't good. Stereotypes don't work. And for the record, now I can accept what liz is saying, and I agree. That was kind of the whole point of the thread - if women value looks more than personality, and looks gets you in the door, don't pretend that men are more shallow than women. Both men AND women are shallow equally.
Kamille Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 All these programs on tv about dropping weight as if that in itself is going to make everything better. The biggest loser is a good show! We need a show called drop the attitude. Maybe they'll call it the "shrinking ass-h@le". :lmao: You know what I would watch? A show about guys or girls who just have no luck in dating going through a "dating" camp that includes a look and personality coaching. I feel like that show must exist, but nothing comes to mind (certainly not the bachelor, which is Ken and Barbies living in a Malibu house). Both men AND women are shallow equally. I totally agree.
Wolf18 Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 I think the reason some of us average or unattractive guys don't listen when people say it's our attitude is because...it isn't. There was a point in my life (during high school) where i used to work out heavily and had a very beautiful and muscular physique. Women went crazy for me, despite the fact that my attitude was pretty bad and I was a very unstable guy and a typical "bad boy" in high school. I've still retained a few of my "bad boy" traits but my body isn't that muscular because I stopped working out years ago because of work and school leaving me no time. I'm not fat at all but im pretty slender (although not a bag of bones at all), let me tell you, it's like night and day when it comes to women. I'm still the same exact person only without some of my very bad personality traits in high school (viciously anti-social, spiteful towards the world, etc) that i grew out of, yet the women just aren't interested in me. I'm interesting, got funny stuff to say, love to go on adventures, and aren't even that ugly, but I'm 5'7 and not jacked. This is why we don't care when people say it's our attitude. It's not . I was a vicious woman hater in high school, because I saw how little loyalty women had to their boyfriends when I took my shirt off and they weren't around, yet they loved me for it . Today, I am way more open minded towards women and they just don't give a ****. So I'm going to get jacked once again to fix my dating problems. I've been a popular attractive guy and completely invisible to women, so I know what the real deal is. And btw, no , it's not just the dumb girls, the smart girls are just as shallow or MORE PICKY because contrary to popular belief men love smart interesting women.
Knittress Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 Women are shallow. Yuh huh. That's 'cause people are shallow, and women are people. The world will not bend itself to your ideals, so just get over it already. At some point I decided to stop getting annoyed at all these "I love size zero women" threads and got my butt on a diet. And indeed - life is easier when you stop fighting reality.
Content Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 I think the reason some of us average or unattractive guys don't listen when people say it's our attitude is because...it isn't. There was a point in my life (during high school) where i used to work out heavily and had a very beautiful and muscular physique. Women went crazy for me, despite the fact that my attitude was pretty bad and I was a very unstable guy and a typical "bad boy" in high school. I've still retained a few of my "bad boy" traits but my body isn't that muscular because I stopped working out years ago because of work and school leaving me no time. I'm not fat at all but im pretty slender (although not a bag of bones at all), let me tell you, it's like night and day when it comes to women. I'm still the same exact person only without some of my very bad personality traits in high school (viciously anti-social, spiteful towards the world, etc) that i grew out of, yet the women just aren't interested in me. I'm interesting, got funny stuff to say, love to go on adventures, and aren't even that ugly, but I'm 5'7 and not jacked. This is why we don't care when people say it's our attitude. It's not . I was a vicious woman hater in high school, because I saw how little loyalty women had to their boyfriends when I took my shirt off and they weren't around, yet they loved me for it . Today, I am way more open minded towards women and they just don't give a ****. So I'm going to get jacked once again to fix my dating problems. I've been a popular attractive guy and completely invisible to women, so I know what the real deal is. And btw, no , it's not just the dumb girls, the smart girls are just as shallow or MORE PICKY because contrary to popular belief men love smart interesting women. That is true if youre hot enough allot of people wont care about your attitude those of us who are average or below it have to make up for it by having above average other things I still think atitude cant hurt but youre right if a women isnt attracted to you she isnt attracted to you some people here want you to beleive having a positive attitude attitude will magically make women who think youre unattratcive think your attractive which is not true Bottom line is looks are a huge part ofattraction, its not the ONLY part but if you dont get by the acceptable threshold of attractivness physically to a certain person you have no shot no matter your positive attitude or outlook
Duckduckgoose Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 Ugly guys need lovins too Just like ugly wimmens need lovins. Ugly wimmens are probably good at SOMETHING or they wouldn't be getting lovins. A lonely ugly man needs to be good at SOMETHING to get a wimmens and get lovins.
Wolf18 Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 That is true if youre hot enough allot of people wont care about your attitude those of us who are average or below it have to make up for it by having above average other things I still think atitude cant hurt but youre right if a women isnt attracted to you she isnt attracted to you some people here want you to beleive having a positive attitude attitude will magically make women who think youre unattratcive think your attractive which is not true Bottom line is looks are a huge part ofattraction, its not the ONLY part but if you dont get by the acceptable threshold of attractivness physically to a certain person you have no shot no matter your positive attitude or outlook I can tell you from countless experiences and as a witness to it: If you have a bad attitude but look attractive, women will just calibrate their personality to suit yours. If you're a biker badass whose hot, women will become biker wenches. If you're criminal whose hot, women will become your accomplice. If you're a hot guy women will be your cheerleaders, no matter what you do. Even the "I am woman hear me roar" types (who aren't lesbos) will turn into submissive little kittens for a guy whose 6'3 with a six pack. So in reality, just be yourself and work on your appearance. If yourself is a guy with a bad attitude, but the exterior is pretty, then it won't matter. The only exception to this is guys who are good looking but nerdy or boring, but even they have a couple of girls after them.
Dust Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 Here’s my problem with you and most every other guy I’ve ever heard complain, they don’t try. When’s the last time you invited a girl to do anything with you? When is the last time you tried to so much as hold hands with a girl? Remember, I’m not asking when you last succeeded at these things, but when was the last time you reached out and tried to touch somebody? People should only ever go out with people they are attracted to. Worry less about who other people are attracted to and give it a try with the people you think are attractive regardless of how you expect it to turn out. Don’t worry about if it’s a success the reward is knowing you tried and kept trying. Professional basketball players miss more shots then you or I will ever even take in our lives. Same goes for baseball players who hit the most home runs, but another way of looking at it is you miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.
somedude81 Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 :lmao: You know what I would watch? A show about guys or girls who just have no luck in dating going through a "dating" camp that includes a look and personality coaching. I feel like that show must exist, but nothing comes to mind (certainly not the bachelor, which is Ken and Barbies living in a Malibu house). It's been done, kinda The Pickup Artist Unfortunately the show is staged. The it would be interesting to have a show where the outcome is not rigged. Ugly guys need lovins too Just like ugly wimmens need lovins. Ugly wimmens are probably good at SOMETHING or they wouldn't be getting lovins. A lonely ugly man needs to be good at SOMETHING to get a wimmens and get lovins. Ugly women get love because they have a vagina. That's it. For some reason in this culture vagina is something to be treasured and sought after while penis can't even be given away.
Mr.Cairo Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 (edited) It's been done, kinda The Pickup Artist Unfortunately the show is staged. The it would be interesting to have a show where the outcome is not rigged. Ugly women get love because they have a vagina. That's it. For some reason in this culture vagina is something to be treasured and sought after while penis can't even be given away. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that eggs are few and temporary, and sperm is abundant and endless. Tell you what. Watch a documentary from the Animal Kingdom. You'll see that the males spreading their genes into the future are superior to the others. They are taller, or stronger, have longer horns, or their tails are filled with marvelous feathers. What could you learn from those animals? That sex, relationships, and reproduction, aren't a a right. They are to be earned and the way to do it is to improve yourself. That means that you have to be at least as good looking as the men who live around you. You'll have to maximize your looks if you want to increase your chances of getting what you want, increase your education level, put good money in the bank, dress sharply, and you will have even more access to women. You are right about that. PUA are actors, nothing more. The shows you see from them, the books they sell, are nothing more but the result of an active imagination. Learn from the men who are naturally good with women. Look at their physical appearance and emulate it. Observe their eyes as they speak to women. What do they convey? Is he smiling? Of course he is? What kind of smile is that? What was her reaction to that smile? Listen well to the topics they're discussing. Try to learn his body language, and for the love of god don't talk about japanese cartoons and japanese costumes or whatever that is. if that means having to save up money to have a height-increase surgery, do it. If that means learning 2 foreign languages, do so. Improve. Evolve. Edited April 7, 2011 by Mr.Cairo
gaius Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 Your position would be frustrating to anyone Muse, so I can't really blame you for the anger. However, when searching for a partner people take everything you present into account. At 5'10 and 210 pounds you are pretty much saying you have no control over yourself when you eat and are unwilling to spend the effort exercising to bring your weight back within the accepted social norms. Lack of control, sloth and not caring about social norms are all unappealing traits and will hurt you in the dating field. And yes, its a dog eat dog world and women are just as shallow as men. We humans really are just another state in the animal kingdom.
MrNate Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 Your position would be frustrating to anyone Muse, so I can't really blame you for the anger. However, when searching for a partner people take everything you present into account. At 5'10 and 210 pounds you are pretty much saying you have no control over yourself when you eat and are unwilling to spend the effort exercising to bring your weight back within the accepted social norms. Lack of control, sloth and not caring about social norms are all unappealing traits and will hurt you in the dating field. And yes, its a dog eat dog world and women are just as shallow as men. We humans really are just another state in the animal kingdom. Preach it brotha/sista. The things I have heard in some female groups... it makes you want to make faces like: But on the flip side, you realize, just how much more similar women are to men, than different. And you get that soft grin on your face..and go about your day. lol
gaius Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 (edited) Preach it brotha/sista. The things I have heard in some female groups... it makes you want to make faces like: But on the flip side, you realize, just how much more similar women are to men, than different. And you get that soft grin on your face..and go about your day. lol Indeed! A lunch trip with a mostly female crowd is always an experience. Oh, and to defend that girl in the store, have you ever been around someone with full blown autism all day long? I have, and it can be trying for even the most patient person, let alone one girl who's probably making 5.50 an hour and busy running around attending to multiple responsibilities. Edited April 7, 2011 by gaius
iris219 Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 I've seen it on here so many times. A woman describes herself as attractive. But she can't get attractive men, only ugly men. Then she gets upset that men only want her for sex. Well, what do you call what you're doing? You obviously want an attractive man for sex! Oh, and the kicker is, women are always complaining that men don't value their personalities, only their looks. Yet, they won't stoop down to give one "ugly guy" a date, because they value looks over personality. Bottom line is, if you want to be valued for something inside of you, value other people for what's inside of THEM. The love you take is equal to the love you make. Women don’t just want to date hot guys. Women want to date men they’re attracted to. There's a big difference. Are you suggesting that women lack the ability to find anything below hot attractive? You know that's absurd. If you looked like Johnny Depp, but had the personality of a rock, you would not do well with women. You'd be on here saying, "I don't understand. I'm hot, but girls don't like me." Personality can make an otherwise average or below average in looks guy hot. Preference plays a role as well. I have friends who view certain men as very good looking, whereas I don't see it at all. People have different taste. I thought my ex resembled Jake Gyllenhaal. I thought he was one of the most beautiful men I had ever seen. I, apparently, was the only one who thought this. When a women really likes you, she doesn't see you as average (even if most of the world does).
Wolf18 Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 Why the hell do you have to look like a male celebrity or model to be considered an attractive man? Why can't you just be an attractive guy in your own way? I can't say the women I'm attracted to look like any celebrities.
Author LeaningIntoTheMuse Posted April 7, 2011 Author Posted April 7, 2011 That's because there are more good looking women, than good looking men. At the same time, these good looking women refuse to settle, so they end up alone. So do the average and ugly looking guys (that are most of the male population.) So women become cat ladies, and men become bitter and angry gym shooters.
Wolf18 Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 That's because there are more good looking women, than good looking men. At the same time, these good looking women refuse to settle, so they end up alone. So do the average and ugly looking guys (that are most of the male population.) So women become cat ladies, and men become bitter and angry gym shooters. Are there really more good looking women? I see women who have a similar face to me (adjusted for gender of course) who are considered absolutely beautiful and have countless guys after them. I see so many average looking women who are hot because they're not fat. I don't think there are more attractive women then men, that is just what we tell ourselves because we find more women attractive than vice a versa. What it is is that there are an equal number of good, average, and ugly looking people in both genders, only men are expected to date down and women are expected to date up. The average man is ecstatic with a shot with an average girl, while the feeling is generally not mutual. Sexual liberation and feminism has ironically destroyed the dating and sex life of the average man. Before the sexual revolution, women were not seen as base sex objects, a man would have to invest a lot of time in courtship in order to get a shot at sleeping with a woman. Today, all you need to do is be very attractive man and hit on average looking women, and in general you will get a hook up 10 minutes after doing that. So in essence, we traded in the ability to attract and keep a partner with our equivelant looks so that the top 10% of men can hump and dump a new one every other day. Because an average looking woman can have sex with a much better looking guy , she will believe she is on his level physically and hence the guys who are actually in her league are no longer good enough. Unfortunately, these women end up learning the hard way, and this is the root of all those "Why don't men want to commit/stick around/etc after having sex with me? " posts.
Author LeaningIntoTheMuse Posted April 7, 2011 Author Posted April 7, 2011 Are there really more good looking women? I see women who have a similar face to me (adjusted for gender of course) who are considered absolutely beautiful and have countless guys after them. I see so many average looking women who are hot because they're not fat. I don't think there are more attractive women then men, that is just what we tell ourselves because we find more women attractive than vice a versa. What it is is that there are an equal number of good, average, and ugly looking people in both genders, only men are expected to date down and women are expected to date up. The average man is ecstatic with a shot with an average girl, while the feeling is generally not mutual. Sexual liberation and feminism has ironically destroyed the dating and sex life of the average man. Before the sexual revolution, women were not seen as base sex objects, a man would have to invest a lot of time in courtship in order to get a shot at sleeping with a woman. Today, all you need to do is be very attractive man and hit on average looking women, and in general you will get a hook up 10 minutes after doing that. So in essence, we traded in the ability to attract and keep a partner with our equivelant looks so that the top 10% of men can hump and dump a new one every other day. Because an average looking woman can have sex with a much better looking guy , she will believe she is on his level physically and hence the guys who are actually in her league are no longer good enough. Unfortunately, these women end up learning the hard way, and this is the root of all those "Why don't men want to commit/stick around/etc after having sex with me? " posts. Makes a lot of sense, really. Although the women on here will deny it. Of course they have to defend the sisterhood.
Ruby Slippers Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 The last guy I dated was cute to me, but he clearly considered himself average or even ugly, because he told me he thought I could get a much hotter guy and would leave him for such a guy one day. To me, this sounded absurd. I had never even thought about such a thing. He seemed a little obsessed with how hot he thought I was, and how not-hot he thought he was. It was his insecurity and self-doubt that kept getting in the way, NOT his looks. To me, THE most attractive quality in a man is intelligence. Even if a guy is downright funny-looking, I usually don't care one bit if he's crazy smart. And that last guy I dated was brilliant, and this drove me wild. He's the first guy who I actually had to work to keep up with intellectually, and I freaking loved every minute of it. I set up a profile on OK Cupid a while back, just to look around, and haven't put up a picture or any info. Well, occasionally, they e-mail you that someone is in your quiver or whatever. So I was looking around the site the other day, and I found this guy that I have been thinking about ever since. This was the first profile I read fully. I usually stop because they are boring, cliche, or pretentious. I read his whole profile, then I came back later to read it again. And one more time before I went to bed. I think he's cute, but he's a little overweight and states that in his body type description. He's probably not the kind of guy lots of women would be chasing, solely based on looks... but I want him!! I have been fantasizing about him ever since. The reason I was so drawn to him is because his profile showed that he's highly intelligent and really thinks and cares about the world with depth. He's a scientist (major weak spot for me, since I love smart men the most), and I'm already dreaming about all the great conversations we're going to have in bed. The point of this rambling post is that looks is not the main concern for some women. People who care more about things other than looks may be rare, but we do exist. You don't need to appeal to every woman -- just that one special woman.
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