Author KineticsEng Posted April 7, 2011 Author Posted April 7, 2011 I don't think anyone should use kids for leverage. But some of us think (and probably him) cheating is a pretty chicken s*** move...just saying. He completely understand.... but why would anyone want to hold their wife hostage. How can that end well? The logic just doesn't support that action.
bentnotbroken Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 He completely understand.... but why would anyone want to hold their wife hostage. How can that end well? The logic just doesn't support that action. And the logic of the affair does? Hmm. I don't believe she is that naive to think that he can take the kids. My opinion is cowardly actions are more the norm than the exception with this couple.
Author KineticsEng Posted April 7, 2011 Author Posted April 7, 2011 And the logic of the affair does? Hmm. I don't believe she is that naive to think that he can take the kids. My opinion is cowardly actions are more the norm than the exception with this couple. I think its more of she doesn't want to negatively affect the children. And he is threating to make things nasty in regards to custody. And our affair actually is pretty logical. Its pretty easy to see how it happened if you knew both of our situations. I'm not saying it was the right action for us to take.... but I think you would under stand why it did.
bentnotbroken Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 I think its more of she doesn't want to negatively affect the children. And he is threating to make things nasty in regards to custody. And our affair actually is pretty logical. Its pretty easy to see how it happened if you knew both of our situations. I'm not saying it was the right action for us to take.... but I think you would under stand why it did. As long as I breath I will never understand why people take this option to issues. But it isn't for me to understand. I just dislike hearing the excuses. I actually respect those who say they do because they want to...nothing else.
PhoenixRise Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 What is holding you hostage in your marriage? You say your wife has no interest in meeting your needs. Why stay? Can't you co-parent with your wife as a divorced couple the same way you would expect your MOW's husband to co-parent with her? Who says that MOW's husband stating that if they divorce he will sue for custody of the children is manipulation to keep her there. Maybe it is just the truth. Why should she automatically be considered the custodial parent? Isn't the father/husband just as much a parent and just as entitled to have the children with him full time as she is? Is the father's love for the children less important than the mother's. Why jump to the conclusion that the father wanting custody of the children is about keeping the wife in place? Maybe the father wanting custody of the children is solely about the children.
Author KineticsEng Posted April 7, 2011 Author Posted April 7, 2011 As long as I breath I will never understand why people take this option to issues. But it isn't for me to understand. I just dislike hearing the excuses. I actually respect those who say they do because they want to...nothing else. I understand your position. What I think your neglecting is that im explaining why we wanted to. And not throwing excuses out there. We know what we did. And why we did it. And now we are dealing with the ramifications of it.
bentnotbroken Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 I understand your position. What I think your neglecting is that im explaining why we wanted to. And not throwing excuses out there. We know what we did. And why we did it. And now we are dealing with the ramifications of it. Not neglecting. The assumption(rather erroneously by more than you) is that others haven't wanted to or that they haven't the opportunity, or the same excuses. If you have been married for any length of time...we have issues with our spouses not meeting some or all of our needs. So in the end...it is still about wanting to do what is easy instead of what is right by all involved.
Author KineticsEng Posted April 7, 2011 Author Posted April 7, 2011 Not neglecting. The assumption(rather erroneously by more than you) is that others haven't wanted to or that they haven't the opportunity, or the same excuses. If you have been married for any length of time...we have issues with our spouses not meeting some or all of our needs. So in the end...it is still about wanting to do what is easy instead of what is right by all involved. I agree. And appreciate your input. Thank you.
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