jans15 Posted April 6, 2011 Posted April 6, 2011 I met this amazing guy(who I work with) months ago however we just became close. We only see each other once a month but it is usually on an overnight assigment. We are both married. I know.. crazy right!? I feel that if I get clarity on the situation I will be able to move on and focus on my loving husband. We got drunk and hung out one night together ending up in my bed. After cuddling for a while (and his repeated I have to go) he eventually did. He is the one that came into my room and initiated our hanging out. I did offer my bed to him after we decided to watch a movie. I figured after he left me he was completely uninterested. We ended up working together again and the same thing happened. This time I leaned in to kiss him (I was drunk) and he said although I think you are really cute, I can't do this. Again, he came into my room and was in my bed cuddling with me. Why can't I stop thinking about him? Why does he keep coming into my room and bed and then leaving!? Why did he cuddle but not allow things to go further. Is he not interested in me? I have no interest in ever leaving my husband however this attraction is all I think of day and night.
Jane Deaux Posted April 6, 2011 Posted April 6, 2011 Wow. You sound almost just like me 6 months ago. Be careful. I am telling you. He is interested. And if you keep pursuing it, it will happen. Then you will be in nothing but love and heartache all at the same time. And it's no fun. And you WILL have thoughts of leaving your husband. End it now before you can't.
Author jans15 Posted April 6, 2011 Author Posted April 6, 2011 If he is interested... why does he get up and leave? That is why I am so confused. He is the one who suggested we get the alcohol and then drink in my room. He then suggested the movie. Can you tell me more about your story?
Jane Deaux Posted April 6, 2011 Posted April 6, 2011 He is interested but he is trying to do the right thing. Which is a better start than mine. I can't pm you because you are new but if you click on my name and go back to the thread I started. Thats my story. I'll tell you the rest if you want to know. As far as the MM you are dealing with, he is finding you attractive. Probably gets a thrill just from the movie and cuddling and is then feeling guilty enough while there to go ahead and leave. But he likes it. However, it seems that he put enough thought into what he was doing the last time to tell you that he can't kiss you. But then, he still wanted the thrill of coming to your room to watch a movie. And if you guys are indeed getting to know one another he may have developed some sort of "spot" for you. And that probably weighs in on the push and pull that he is doing.
Emme Posted April 6, 2011 Posted April 6, 2011 Um... what i have learned is that women don't give men enough credit. What you have discibed above is a man who is building a web for you without you realizing. Now you are stuck and you can't move. He is not trying to do the right thing he is trying to get you to push the circumstances forward so it seems as though you initiated it. When it's actually him. He wants you to want him that's why he comes and then pulls away. Why don't you try it. See what happens. He is playing with your emotions and he has succeeded. So how bad do you want him?
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