Sheppy99 Posted April 6, 2011 Posted April 6, 2011 Hi guys. Not sure if this is the correct forum for this but everybody here was so helpful when I was getting over my last gf that it makes me feel most comfortable seeking advice here if that is ok. So I'm in University and in all of my classes there was this unbelievably pretty girl that I would just look in her way sometimes and wonder what she is thinking. I'm a fairly confident person but to me she is just so my type and perfect that it almost scares me. So for the past 3 months I haven't said anything to her and in one of my 3 classes I sit directly behind her every class and it's a theater style layout. So 3 weeks ago during this class she turned around and started talking to me and I literally almost swallowed my tongue, no joke, lol. She basically started the conversation by saying "hey are you in my philosophy class?" I replied of course with yes I am. She said she had missed one of the classes and needed some notes so I quickly saw an opening and asked for her email. Sent her the information she needed and didn't look too much into it at that point. Figured she just needed something for class. So the next week after that, she got to class and immediately turned around with a massive smile on her face and started talking to me and asking me questions and telling me about herself. She told me she worked at the airport and asked me how old I was. I said the dumbest thing "old enough" and laughed because I'm 28 and she's probably like 22-24 and I didn't want to scare her off lol. After class we walked to the parking lot together and continued laughing and very pleasant conversation. So at this point I'm wondering possibly she is interested. So later on that week she emailed me and asked me if I had went to one of our other classes and said she missed it unfortunately and ended the conversation with "see you in philosophy class :)" So up to this point I have never sat with her in this particular class and she rarely ever goes to this class. So I'm thinking that this is a hint she wants me to sit with her in philosophy class. So I sent her back this really up beat email and for some retarded reason I ended it with "Take care" I have no idea why I said take care and not see you in class as well. I think it's because where I work I end most of my conversations with clients with "Take care" so it's force of habit. Worst yet, day of class comes. I get there late and a guy friend of mine was waiting outside class for me with notes he had gone to the trouble of printing off for me. I've always sat with him through every class. I got into the class room and seen she was sitting near the front. My buddy immediately grabs a seat at the back cause he likes to sit at the back. So immediately I realize I'm in a terrible situation. I can't snub my buddy but I don't want to snub her either. Well I sat with him. At the end of class I waited to walk out with her and she was anything but chatty. This was last thursday. Monday comes and this is the class where I sit directly behind her and the last 3 weeks she's been coming into class and immediately turning around and talking to me all smiles. She comes into class last night and literally sits down and acts like I don't exist at all. When class ended, she bolted out of the theater like her pants was on fire. Tonights class more of the same. My question is, did my email response where I said "take care" at the end coupled with me not sitting with her on thursday in class give her the impression that I wasn't interested? She has completely turned into the ice princess on me. Also, I did email her asking her if she'd like to do something this weekend to show her that I am interested last night but I haven't gotten a response back at all. It is her university email so I'm not sure how often she checks it. I'm completely confused any advice would be appreciated
Trovador Posted April 6, 2011 Posted April 6, 2011 Girls are very apt at playing the hot/cold game, they even do it unconsciously... It works, isn't it? So, you expect it is a game, right, as in she is doing it out of interest towards you... Stop it. You are getting infatuated. You don't have a real basis to think you are more that the "nice guy I see sometimes in class"... you are better off thinking nothing is fluorishing between you two... let some time pass and try to be objective, because you might have the crush of your life, the pun is free... Personally (that is, according to my experience) I think she doesn't have romantical feelings for you, girls are slower in developing that kind of emotions, but she might fall for you, if you stop acting like a nerdy teen... never snug a woman because your friends, family or whatever, with the sole exception of your mother... and don't be afraid of flirting a little (with wit and class of course)... that "take care" is so innocuous that she forgot about it, if she happened to notice it... Raise the stakes, man...
Author Sheppy99 Posted April 6, 2011 Author Posted April 6, 2011 Girls are very apt at playing the hot/cold game, they even do it unconsciously... It works, isn't it? So, you expect it is a game, right, as in she is doing it out of interest towards you... Stop it. You are getting infatuated. You don't have a real basis to think you are more that the "nice guy I see sometimes in class"... you are better off thinking nothing is fluorishing between you two... let some time pass and try to be objective, because you might have the crush of your life, the pun is free... Personally (that is, according to my experience) I think she doesn't have romantical feelings for you, girls are slower in developing that kind of emotions, but she might fall for you, if you stop acting like a nerdy teen... never snug a woman because your friends, family or whatever, with the sole exception of your mother... and don't be afraid of flirting a little (with wit and class of course)... that "take care" is so innocuous that she forgot about it, if she happened to notice it... Raise the stakes, man... Great advice. You are 100 percent correct and I definitely shouldn't be thinking as if there is something there I'm missing out on because of a few overly friendly conversations. I need to play it cool and act as though all is normal. I mentioned a hang out this weekend in an email that I had to send to her anyways for class so the ball is in her court. I can't do much more than that or beat myself up because I may have inadvertently upset her by possibly giving her the impression that I was avoiding her in class by not sitting with her. I know that sounds so childish but I honestly couldn't think of anything else for the sudden coldness. As you said though, the hold cold game is a sign of interest but I'm not going to partake in it. I have more important things to worry about than games. Maybe some girls like being courted and chased but it just isn't my style. As you said, raise the stakes. I think mentioning a hang out let her know that I am somewhat interested so I'll leave the rest up to her. If nothing comes of it so be it. Just really is a bummer cause I liked this girl from a far for months and to of gotten to this point to only have her completely do a 180 is very perplexing to me. Honestly thinking back on it, she really did do all the work. Initiated all the conversations in class, emailed me in flirty ways and I haven't really done much of anything aside from the offered hang outs after she turned ice cold. hmmm
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