jstobo Posted April 5, 2011 Posted April 5, 2011 Going on a first date tonight. It's been a long time since I've had a first date that wasn't meeting a woman for coffee. This is dinner, outside, overlooking the ocean. My plan is to wear a nice pair of jeans and a plaid button down shirt. Is that too informal for a first date? I own suits for work and jeans and dockers for casual. Advice is much appreciated!!
BeginAgain Posted April 5, 2011 Posted April 5, 2011 I don't know. Are you the Brawny lumberjack? Though seriously you can't go wrong with black slacks, a white dress shirt, black jacket, a dress belt, and dress shoes.
Author jstobo Posted April 5, 2011 Author Posted April 5, 2011 I don't know. Are you the Brawny lumberjack? Though seriously you can't go wrong with black slacks, a white dress shirt, black jacket, a dress belt, and dress shoes. Good point about the Lumberjack. That seems so dressy. No?
BeginAgain Posted April 5, 2011 Posted April 5, 2011 For a romantic dinner by the ocean no it isn't too dressy unless you are going to Joe's crabshack on the pier. Expect the girl will dress to the nine's. If she doesn't you can ease the tension by using light flirtatious humor, reassuring her by caressing her arm, and gently smiling.
SweetDaphne Posted April 5, 2011 Posted April 5, 2011 From a girls perspective: I'd go with a nice shirt and khaki's. It's not too formal but at the same time it makes it look like you care about your appearance. Jeans might be a little informal - unless of course the place you're going to is relatively casual/informal. Otherwise nice shirt (button down or polo) and khaki's always works.
Andy_K Posted April 5, 2011 Posted April 5, 2011 Wear what you feel expresses your personality best. Wear what will make you feel most confident and comfortable, because that will make far more of an impression on your date that the clothes you happen to be wearing.
threebyfate Posted April 5, 2011 Posted April 5, 2011 This is so personal. The easiest way for us to help you is for you to post a pic wearing what you normally wear in a semi-casual but relaxed atmosphere. If you want a more up-to-date look, you can get some fashion ideas from Armani exchange. The looks suggested might be a bit young depending on your age and body type. Some guys can wear AX or similar into their fifties, if they're in good shape with a lean body type. One thing's for certain, create your own style instead of the exact look since some of it leans towards being effeminate or tries to emulate a poser street look. As for my own preferences for seeing a man dress for a dinner like this, a pair of relaxed semi-casual dress pants, soft linen shirt, plain crew neck t-shirt and outdoor jacket or casual cut blazer. When you layer like this, you're not a victim to weather conditions.
iris219 Posted April 5, 2011 Posted April 5, 2011 I prefer men in jeans actually, so I like the jeans and plaid button down idea. I like the jeans and blazer look as well, but that might just be me. I hate when guys look like they've just come from work in an office when they haven't. I don't like men in khakis at all. I'm OK with Banana Republic kind of dress pants if you're going to a very nice restaurant (not sure how upscale the place is). Good luck on your date!
BeginAgain Posted April 5, 2011 Posted April 5, 2011 The khakis would work well since the dinner is near the ocean and khakis go with the yacht look.
reservoirdog1 Posted April 5, 2011 Posted April 5, 2011 If you're wearing jeans, go with a fitted casual collared shirt with long sleeves. One solid colour, or two colours max without an excessively garish pattern. The button-down lumberjack thing sounds a bit nerdy and uptight, sorry to say (if it's what I'm picturing). It's a first date. You want to convey "cool, casual, confident" -- not uptight and overly restrained. If you have a dark coloured, good quality, casual sport jacket you can wear over it, that's good too.
Feelin Frisky Posted April 5, 2011 Posted April 5, 2011 The lumberjack image didn't come to mind with your description. I assume you didn't mean blue jeans. Your dress should be appropriate for where you are going on your date. It sounds like you have a handle on what casual attire should be (button down shirt, slacks). I would add to wear real shoes and not sneakers of any kind and see to it that they are sporty and clean. Chicks look at that. Don't wear "police shoes"--they may be black and shiny but they project a lack of style. If you are going to a posh restaurant, the suit may be more appropriate. If you are going to a dance club (do people do that any more?), wear something stylish for that. Remember the shoes. It's ridiculous but true many times.
Author jstobo Posted April 5, 2011 Author Posted April 5, 2011 This is all good stuff. I'm 40, in shape, but not super thin. I'm not sure AX fits my body style. The restaurant is an outdoor patio. Not fancy. Not Joe's Crab Shack. Think Bistro I guess. I definitely hear you about the shoes. I have a great pair of Gucci shoes that you wouldn't wear with a suit. Perfect for this.
blackmagik Posted April 5, 2011 Posted April 5, 2011 Jeans nowadays can work. You just have to have the right type. Most restaurants are casual so you can typically get away with it. I would check on Yelp to see what the attire is like from the restaurants point of view. I would also send her a text or a phone call letting her know that it is just causal attire for the date which in my mind is perfectly okay to do. A always prefer a nice fitted jean myself and a collared but solid color dress shirt coupled with a NICE pair of leather shoes can really look good yet casual. Like other said though its all about how you feel in the outfit. If you feel confident and comfortable, so will your conversation throughout the night. If you are unsure or worried about your look that will come through as well... go with comfort and confidence and you'll be golden.
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