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Second day of nC.... hurting bad, missing him


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Posted

Second day of NC...this is so hard, but I haev been reading so much about how this will help me as well as make him miss me...yes I want him back.. I was wrong in this one..... but he has been playing games and I fed in to it.... it's been almost two weeks since I told him to leave. HE said he wants to work it out but then I get impatient and hurt cause nothing happens...he doesnt call, come home, nothing. But he said twice now that he wants to work things out. ANyhow...of course my mind is everywhere with this...thinking he met someone else so quick... But i also know that he hasnt been feeling so great since he lost his job in early March due to the job ending. Now he is waiting on a new job to begin. He is an electrician and there is a two year job coming up and the boss said he will be on it. So I know that not working and our argument and me telling him to leave made things bad..

I miss him....but no contact cause I tried and he said he loves me, misses me, wants to work things out, but doesnt do anything about it.... so waht now? Keep no contact I know....

We lived together... he came and got some of his things and left most of it to see how things pan out. Do you think he could be feeling really bruised about not working?

Posted (edited)

You have to look at his actions. Not his words. It's not just saying, it's doing. He can say 20 times everyday he wants to work it out but if does nothing but talk, what is there to hold on to? If you didn't see anything of substance, you have to stick to NC. Breaking it will take you back to what made you start NC in the first place.

 

Who knows what is going on in his head. Maybe he is depressed and can't get his act together. Maybe he just can't give you what you want eventhough he loves you. Stop blaming yourself. If two people want to work things out, it doesn't matter how bad the situation is, they will work it out because they want to stay together.

 

And you can't analyzen what he is thinking or feeling unless he's there sharing his thoughts and plans and wanting you to be there to help him through this hard time and save the R.

Edited by geegirl
Posted

NC gets easier the longer it goes on. Talking on here should help, a place where you can say to strangers what you might want to say to him.

 

Sort of like the letter you should write and never send. There are so many people here with similar problems and will be there to help you overcome any weaknesses :)

Posted

Mov and Butterfly, correct me if I am wrong, but I believe we are all on day 2 of no contact. Let's stick with each other and be each other's support systems here (if you want). The three of us can do this. together. Crazy how total strangers who can empathize with what is going on are sometimes the best to have around.

 

If you guys are interested I just posted a novel under the title, "I need to be honest with you guys and myself" which details my exact situation. Warning, it is very long, but if you have time would appreciate a read. It makes for a good read if nothing else.

 

Good luck you two, I am sure we will be talking soon.

Posted

It will pass

Time to meditate and retrospect

Assume it as a test

Time will heal all the wounds

it all depends on whether you want to forget or not

Posted
Second day of NC...this is so hard, but I haev been reading so much about how this will help me as well as make him miss me...yes I want him back.. I was wrong in this one..... but he has been playing games and I fed in to it.... it's been almost two weeks since I told him to leave. HE said he wants to work it out but then I get impatient and hurt cause nothing happens...he doesnt call, come home, nothing. But he said twice now that he wants to work things out. ANyhow...of course my mind is everywhere with this...thinking he met someone else so quick... But i also know that he hasnt been feeling so great since he lost his job in early March due to the job ending. Now he is waiting on a new job to begin. He is an electrician and there is a two year job coming up and the boss said he will be on it. So I know that not working and our argument and me telling him to leave made things bad..

I miss him....but no contact cause I tried and he said he loves me, misses me, wants to work things out, but doesnt do anything about it.... so waht now? Keep no contact I know....

We lived together... he came and got some of his things and left most of it to see how things pan out. Do you think he could be feeling really bruised about not working?

 

read my post under shapp.

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