Mr.Cairo Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 Oh wow. I think you're way off base. I'm 41, and I supervise a whole host of young girls in their early 20's- a lot of them really beautiful. It's never bothered me. I don't love being 41, but I don't begrudge any young women for having the youth I don't have. I have wisdom they don't have, and I wouldn't trade that to be 20 again. I actually wasn't anywhere near beautiful when I was in my early 20's- I didn't come into my own until my early 30's, when I lost some weight and gained a sense of confidence I never had when I was younger. I love being a mentor to younger women- I really enjoy being around them. I've always thought it important to help younger women feel more confident by pointing out what is wonderful about them. There is nothing threatening about a beautiful woman to me, younger or older. I'll always be that woman that will compliment a stranger because she looks great. I'll never be that woman that scowls at another woman when I pass by her because I think she's hotter than me- I don't even think like that. I'll be that woman that smiles at them. If I could take the wisdom and confidence I have now and put it into a 20 year old body, I'd love it- but life isn't fair. By the time you get your **** together, your body and young looks have usually given up on you, lol. I don't know how this thread turned into men bashing older women for hating younger women and making an issue out of women of a certain age being bitter and expired. It's kinda mean, and it's kinda framing women as a commodity with an expiry date. Apparantly, the same girls some of the men are defending right now for being younger- won't be worthy of defense in 10 years when they hit an expiry date. Kinda sad. People should be with whom they want to be, and if they can have what they want, there's nothing wrong with it as long as both members know what is and what is not, and as long as the people are legal in that Country. Relationships are on an expiration date. I'd dump a woman/or be dumped such a fast, if she was 30 years old, doesn't matter her age. Every thing ends. Make the most of it!
BeginAgain Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 Oh wow. I think you're way off base. I'm 41, and I supervise a whole host of young girls in their early 20's- a lot of them really beautiful. It's never bothered me. I don't love being 41, but I don't begrudge any young women for having the youth I don't have. I have wisdom they don't have, and I wouldn't trade that to be 20 again. I actually wasn't anywhere near beautiful when I was in my early 20's- I didn't come into my own until my early 30's, when I lost some weight and gained a sense of confidence I never had when I was younger. I love being a mentor to younger women- I really enjoy being around them. I've always thought it important to help younger women feel more confident by pointing out what is wonderful about them. There is nothing threatening about a beautiful woman to me, younger or older. I'll always be that woman that will compliment a stranger because she looks great. I'll never be that woman that scowls at another woman when I pass by her because I think she's hotter than me- I don't even think like that. I'll be that woman that smiles at them. If I could take the wisdom and confidence I have now and put it into a 20 year old body, I'd love it- but life isn't fair. By the time you get your **** together, your body and young looks have usually given up on you, lol. I don't know how this thread turned into men bashing older women for hating younger women and making an issue out of women of a certain age being bitter and expired. It's kinda mean, and it's kinda framing women as a commodity with an expiry date. Apparantly, the same girls some of the men are defending right now for being younger- won't be worthy of defense in 10 years when they hit an expiry date. Kinda sad. I once heard the average age women want to go back to is in their 30's but for men it is in their 20's.
Mr.Cairo Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 (edited) I totally agree, if they're over 21, that while it may have creeped me out at 21 to be approached by 30-somethings (it totally did; I hated and cringed every time it happened; frankly, I feel the same way about 40-somethings now and even guys in their late 30s make me sigh because I know they think I'm even younger than I am, and I consider myself too young for them). Mr. Cairo As per various countries, I've lived all over. There are many countries where women marry/have kids WAY younger than in the U.S. (I've lived in a South American country, where this is common). I find that a bit sad, based on the lives I've seen people live in such places (generally they get married so young because of lack of opportunity, and are sexualized young by older men for the same reasons), but I don't impose my culture on them. However, anyone in/from MY culture (U.S. or any similar English-speaking Western culture) gets the cultural mores here placed upon them, and dating high schoolers or teenagers when you're an adult of 30+ is against social mores in my circle. Most of the educated 20/30something men I hang out with, as well as the women, would not find that kosher. I have taught and tutored 17 and 18 year olds. I'm only 26. To think of even someone my age attempting to "pick them up" disgusts me, as an educator. A 23 year old, the top of the OP's ceiling, is a totally different story. A 10 year age difference is too much to me, but I don't find it creepy or predatory like trying to date teenagers. We're not talking about South America. I know whats going on with older men and younger women in those Countries, but I'm talking about the western world, where most people are well-off enough to not sell their daughters. I've seen many, many women my age, when I was a teen, reject the guys their age for guys older than them. Guys in their 20's and up. Their mothers knew about it and didn't make a scene out of it. I've seen women in their 20's dating guys in their 30's and up. I've been the center of female attention in colleges or in any other place filled with young women, just for being older, and many of those young women had the means to choose any guy they wanted to have. I've seen average guys, even short guys, with no money, dating attractive 18 year olds, and these guys weren't even that much older, like in their late 20's. Why? Why are there are so many women, young, dating guys who are older or much older if this, if it happens, must have something to do with poverty? Why are rich women like Emmy Rossum, marrying at the age of 17, a guy who was older by 10 years? Why are young women, in their prime, with so many options, being able of having anyone they want - choosing guys who are older? We could say that they have the money, but I've seen too many poor guys having girlfriends, attractive girlfriends, young women whose parents provided for everything, and yet, they chose the older male. Why is it so common for a 16 year old girl to date a 19 year old man? Why is the law of consent below the age of 18 in many, many Countries? It seems to me that, if women were so disgusted by older men, that they' d stay away from them as much as possible, instead of being so liberal, so suggestive with the older male. Edited April 7, 2011 by Mr.Cairo
cpllkn4bifem812 Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 We are a couple I am a 27 yr old bifemale and hubby is straight and 45. We are very happy and secure in our realationship,that is why other young females are free to experience what I have with him. Also we share young women too, from 18 to 35. Like you I am not into other men, I have the one I desire and want to be with but always looking for the one special bifemale to join us and be a part of our family. Older women do seem to have more baggage like you said than the you ger ones and the younger ones are more apt to experiment with their sexuallity too. If you ever feel the need to become a part of a family let us know and we would be honored to bring you in on our love.
TryingtoUnderstand32 Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 Haha, you're just bitter that you don't have as many options as a younger woman got under her sleeve. You'll probably end up dating guys in their 50's because now, the men who were rejected when younger, are enjoying(and the women are doing it too)spending time with younger women. We all have our time to shine. Now that I have means(in all it's shapes and meanings), I go after what I want, and what I want is young, attractive women. Everybody wins. The younger women are treated like real women, instead of having sex with guys who don't know what they are doing, see women as pieces of meat, they spend enjoyable moments with educated, worldly men. Yes, you know how disturbing it is for a woman of 18 years and older than that, having a man taking her to places she's never been to, and getting her rid of all of those insecurities that so many women have, and also, to show to her that they can achieve much more than they have around them(those silly college boys). Yes, I also find it funny how many, young women, although being rich, are dating older guys. But that's a man manipulating a woman since women can't sincerely be attracted to males who are infinitely superior, in various ways, to the guys women have around them, in the same age group. The Patriarchy is so evil that it even attempts men from making women happy, tries to restrict men to a certain age group! Very funny to see the women my age bitter at my lack of interest in them. Its even more funny when they realize that the women I'm with have the youth, the brains, and the personality that they claim are only possible in women in their late 20's and upwards Dumbest thing I have read in a very long time
TryingtoUnderstand32 Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 Cairo- I'm gonna guess that you are of Middle Eastern descent?
bac Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 It is normal to want younger women for sex. Who does not? It is OK for a male to be with younger girls. If they agree to deal with you, it means you can offer the right stuff for them and you are able to choose the right girls. Women often look at relationships like that with negative attitude because there are some specifics in this type of relationships. They can understand the specifics because they are in the shoes of females. For example, you will never expect younger girls to pay for anything.
Mr.Cairo Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 Cairo- I'm gonna guess that you are of Middle Eastern descent? Wrong guess. I'm as white as anyone here, although much less feminized.
LovelyJublee Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 I am in my early twenties and I'm appalled by the attitudes of some of these men.Personally me and my girlfriends love guys our own age as they are fit,fun and have the same interests.Not older wrinklies who have erections that go floppy mid-sex and patronise us for being young.I also think a good chunk of the worlds most beautiful are in their 30's from my point of view and my best friend is a decade older and stunning!
TryingtoUnderstand32 Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 I am in my early twenties and I'm appalled by the attitudes of some of these men.Personally me and my girlfriends love guys our own age as they are fit,fun and have the same interests.Not older wrinklies who have erections that go floppy mid-sex and patronise us for being young.I also think a good chunk of the worlds most beautiful are in their 30's from my point of view and my best friend is a decade older and stunning! Not that I agree with the men saying what they are saying but I'm pretty sure these guys are in their thirties..most men in their thirties don't have wrinkles or floppy erections. So the comments you have made make you no better than them.
LovelyJublee Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 You don't like me cos I revealed you to be a liar on the other thread.You are also a hypocrite cos you are all over this thread ranting yourself!At least I stay calm.
Mr.Cairo Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 I am in my early twenties and I'm appalled by the attitudes of some of these men.Personally me and my girlfriends love guys our own age as they are fit,fun and have the same interests.Not older wrinklies who have erections that go floppy mid-sex and patronise us for being young.I also think a good chunk of the worlds most beautiful are in their 30's from my point of view and my best friend is a decade older and stunning! I'm in my 20's, little pony princess
TryingtoUnderstand32 Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 You don't like me cos I revealed you to be a liar on the other thread.You are also a hypocrite cos you are all over this thread ranting yourself!At least I stay calm. You are young, so that explains a lot.
BeginAgain Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 Guys would it be acceptable if she or someone similar to her was my dream girl?
Emilia Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 I'm almost 39 and I suppose what surprises me is how men on this thread rate younger women more easy-going and relaxed than us in our late 30s or 40s in general. I see a lot of younger girls as quite insecure and immature, not confident enough to explore. Anyway, to answer the original question: I am attracted to much younger men myself so I can't critisise the OP for feeling the same way towards younger women. A lot of men don't age particularly well, they go bald, let themselves go and grow a beer belly and only want to watch sports on the telly rather than do anything interesting. As I am quite sporty and have travelled around the world, lived in Africa etc, I like men that are more adventurous. Many loose that streak by the time they get to their mid-30s. I also think it's about socio-economic status in general. Those that are perhaps not so affluent and have a more basic life style lose their looks soon enough and you will see them get a bit flabby/fat. I work in the financial district in London and a lot of men my age are quite well to do with decent jobs. They know how to look after themselves and keep in very good shape, they are used to competition. They can give younger men run for their money. So I think in general if you live in an environment where everyone is quite settled, where the population are not particularly competitive, men and women slow down and lose their looks by their 30s. Those of us that live in larger cities are kept on our toes more and we look after ourselves more. I see a lot of attractive guys in their 40s around here. One poster here mentioned he liked women who knew their place in the dating environment. That comment to me reflects socio-economic status as well. Nowdays that sort of argument is seen as uncouth in more sophisticated circles.
BeginAgain Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 I'm almost 39 and I suppose what surprises me is how men on this thread rate younger women more easy-going and relaxed than us in our late 30s or 40s in general. I see a lot of younger girls as quite insecure and immature, not confident enough to explore. Anyway, to answer the original question: I am attracted to much younger men myself so I can't critisise the OP for feeling the same way towards younger women. A lot of men don't age particularly well, they go bald, let themselves go and grow a beer belly and only want to watch sports on the telly rather than do anything interesting. As I am quite sporty and have travelled around the world, lived in Africa etc, I like men that are more adventurous. Many loose that streak by the time they get to their mid-30s. I also think it's about socio-economic status in general. Those that are perhaps not so affluent and have a more basic life style lose their looks soon enough and you will see them get a bit flabby/fat. I work in the financial district in London and a lot of men my age are quite well to do with decent jobs. They know how to look after themselves and keep in very good shape, they are used to competition. They can give younger men run for their money. So I think in general if you live in an environment where everyone is quite settled, where the population are not particularly competitive, men and women slow down and lose their looks by their 30s. Those of us that live in larger cities are kept on our toes more and we look after ourselves more. I see a lot of attractive guys in their 40s around here. One poster here mentioned he liked women who knew their place in the dating environment. That comment to me reflects socio-economic status as well. Nowdays that sort of argument is seen as uncouth in more sophisticated circles. This is what happens when a society is more homogeneous. You get more classism.
Emilia Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 This is what happens when a society is more homogeneous. You get more classism. London is heterogeneous and I'm not British, wasn't even born in the UK. Other than that you are spot on.
bac Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 Not that I agree with the men saying what they are saying but I'm pretty sure these guys are in their thirties..most men in their thirties don't have wrinkles or floppy erections. So the comments you have made make you no better than them. As for erections, the guys who are looking for younger girls can not do wrong with sex because they are dealing with innocent and naive girls. The girls have a poor idea of what sex is about. Many of them feel nothing sexually but they feel great emotional satisfaction because sex gives them a sense of being valuable, popular, beautiful, loved, supported and other similar emotions. So, guys can sell them any type of bad sex or any strange sexual fantasies. Perhaps, the older guys are somehow insecure about their sexual abilities if they are afraid to have sex with a partner who might be able to experience sexual pleasure. Young people do whatever older people tell them to do in sex.
kiss_andmakeup Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 All of the generalizations on this thread are exhausting. There are 19 year olds who are very mature (while they are rare) and there are 30 year olds who are very immature. The idea that by wanting to date someone in the 17-23 age range (although I agree that 23 is much different from 17) the OP would be "victimizing" them is just ridiculous. I met my boyfriend when I was 20 and he was 31. We are still together at 23 & 34. I was always rather mature for my age but, beyond that, our personalities were/are extremely compatible. I felt no different than I would have around a mature 22 year old. We have great chemistry (including sexual) and I wouldn't want to be with anyone else. The idea that some people on here are essentially implying that I must have been a "victim" when we met is ludicrous. I knew exactly what I was doing. OP, while I would recommend maybe staying out of the teen zone for the sake of your own sanity, as long as it's legal where you are and you find someone you can relate to and enjoy being around, then go for it.
Lizzie60 Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 Of course it's OK... I want (and have) much younger men too!!!!
BeginAgain Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 There is no such thing as maturity. It is just a guilt trip mostly by women who want to mother everyone because the most powerful figure in their early childhoods which they had the most contact with were their mothers.
kiss_andmakeup Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 There is no such thing as maturity. It is just a guilt trip mostly by women who want to mother everyone because the most powerful figure in their early childhoods which they had the most contact with were their mothers. I'm assuming this was directed at me since I'm the only one who has mentioned maturity? If you had bothered to read my whole post you would have seen that I was actually agreeing with you and telling the OP there's nothing wrong with dating younger women.
bac Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 I would honestly suggest you date people who have at least graduated high school. I'm only 23, but I can't stress to you how much I have changed since I was 17. I actually think it would be extremely awkward to date someone who is 17..are you gonna go pick them up from their parent's house? Do you have to drive them around? (I didn't get a car until I was 17) You can't take them to bars or clubs...I have to admit I find it weird that besides them being "hot" that that would even appeal to you... That part of female's body that the guys are mostly interested in has not changed much. The men just care about your young, sexy looks which make them hard. They care the least about how much your mind and sole has changed since 17 to 23.
Dlyrica Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 That part of female's body that the guys are mostly interested in has not changed much. The men just care about your young, sexy looks which make them hard. They care the least about how much your mind and sole has changed since 17 to 23. Are you saying my vagina hasn't changed much?? Obviously that is not the concern since I'm pretty sure mid twenties to thirty year olds still have their vaginas. Most of the guys opinions ARE about the woman's mind and soul and how they are different the older you get...I think this is a stupid argument in general but I find your response especially moot.
Eeyore79 Posted April 8, 2011 Posted April 8, 2011 Pedophilia ends when the focus of the sexual attraction has entered puberty and in a girl that's 12 or 13 on average. So it's not pedophilia if the girl is 12-13? Erm, I think the law might disagree... When two teenagers have sex, it's likely to be very innocent and straight-forward. An older man will often try to introduce a teenager to sex acts and fetishes that she definitely isn't ready for, and if she's young and naive he'll probably be able to convince her to do whatever he wants. That's wrong, whether she's legal or not. You can cause serious psychological trauma for a teenage girl if you use and abuse her for your own sexual gratification, whicis obviously what you're doing since an adult man in his 30s can't possibly want a relationship with a teenager. Selfish, selfish, selfish...
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