CommunityRN Posted April 3, 2011 Posted April 3, 2011 So, I'm new to this feeling of (possibly and probably) being cheated on so I'm not really sure what to think or do. My boyfriend and I have been together for two years. Things have been a little bit 'off' and different lately, but I've been trying hard to work through it; trying to get us back to that spot we were at. I've been trying to make plans with him, do things that make him happy, etc. I'm tired of trying; it's making me so exhausted. He always has excuses to not want to be with me, or, if we do have plans, he breaks them. We had a small argument about this this past Wednesday. I explained how I was feeling and he told me that I was being completely ridiculous and outrageous and selfish. I felt this was totally outlandish but shut my mouth and dealt with it and gave him space. Well, I let him have it all day Thursday - at which time his cousin was sent to the hospital and the only reason I know about that is because one of our mutual friends asked me how the cousin was doing. So I figured, okay, he's got a lot on his plate. I called to let him know I was there for him, but nothing. No dice. Fast forward to Saturday evening. I still hadn't heard from him. I know I should NOT have done this, and I'm not looking to be chastised for doing this, but I just had a feeling so I went on his Facebook because I know his pw. I found messages he sent to a girl he'd met on a vacation a couple years prior telling her he'd be in the town she lived in tonight and did she want to meet up for some drinks and 'fun'. I called his friend to ask if he'd heard from him, and he said as far as he knew he was in said town with one of his guy friends. Except this guy friend was in a completely other city with his girlfriend. If I ever go to grab his phone to look something up (iPhone) he goes nuts and gets antsy; he never wants to take me out when he goes out with his guy friends (who bring their girlfriends); he won't let me meet the people he works with. I think I've bee avoiding what I was knowing in my head for a long time and last night, everything started to make sense. I know I shouldn't have gone on his FB. But now I wonder, on the nights when he was out till 5 and 6 am, who was he REALLY with? I don't know how to confront him or what to do. Even if nothing physical happened - he lied to me, he lied to others, and is getting in touch with random girls for 'drinks and fun'. I suppose I just needed to vent. Anyone have any advice for dealing?
SummersEve Posted April 3, 2011 Posted April 3, 2011 Honestly it sounds like it doesn't matter that much what you do, he is backing off out of this relationship and moving on. It seems that all he's left you here is the chance to keep some dignity, so why not take it. Just stop contacting him completely since it seems to irritate him so much. I think it is trashy of HIM to leave you to figure it out on Facebook after two years together. Sorry.
fltc Posted April 3, 2011 Posted April 3, 2011 You can't trust him, that's the end of any relationship. Sorry.
Author CommunityRN Posted April 4, 2011 Author Posted April 4, 2011 Thanks guys. After a very messy bit tonight, we ended it. I still don't know how I feel, as it was only a few hours ago. I feel relieved and incredibly sad at the same time. I already miss his family. But there were just so many things going on. Too many. He said nothing happened, and I believe him, but I've been suspicious of it before. It doesn't make it any easier now.
ComputerJock Posted April 4, 2011 Posted April 4, 2011 Now its time to work on yourself, have fun, go to the gym and find a new boyfriend who doesn't cheat.
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