WorldIsYours Posted April 3, 2011 Posted April 3, 2011 No, when your partner tells you something that matters a lot to them and you continue to ignore them, they might leave you. Exactly how that ending comes about is not the point. Ahh so it's okay to cheat and in the process, help destroy someone else's marriage because of relationship issues they refuse to be mature about and try to work on.
WorldIsYours Posted April 3, 2011 Posted April 3, 2011 If I read it right, I believe her date thing and her ending it with OP occurred right around the same time. No, cheating isn't right, but endings also don't come neatly. It sounded like it was all at the same time, like she just wanted out. The MM thing, ick, but separate. No point getting too legalistic, could be she made a date with somebody else and ended it with OP on the same day. It does not mean, as some would say, that she is the devil and had no cause to end it, that OP had no fault in the break up. The fact remains she cheated before her ex found out, and tried to justify her cheating by using the words "break" and "date.":lmao:
WorldIsYours Posted April 3, 2011 Posted April 3, 2011 Stop putting words in my mouth. You have an ax to grind with cheating and exxagerate everything about it and see nothing else. Nothing is exagerated about the facts of infidelity. I think you are a little bit off kilter and need to go spin on your axis for a while. Okay I will. I suggest you do the same. P.S. If you're not married, you don't need to work it out. Same can be said for married folks. When you decide that person is not the one, you just go. Exactly!!! So instead of being a tramp by cheating and causing destruction to the innocent folks, simply leaving/divorcing is the mature way to go.
WorldIsYours Posted April 3, 2011 Posted April 3, 2011 Damn, shut up. Mono-rant. LOL I'm literally afraid I can't do that. It's a public board and we're merely discussing.
fooled once Posted April 4, 2011 Posted April 4, 2011 Hmmmm...I starting to think that this would not have happened if I only showed her more attention Lost, My view - maybe you could have spent more time but that doesn't mean it was okay for her to cheat. That is on her; that is hers to own. She chose to cheat. There is someone else out there for you. My advice - have her stuff ready for her, wish her well and then escort her out the door.
Flabbergaster Posted April 4, 2011 Posted April 4, 2011 Lost: creative criticism Why did you only see her on weekends? Are you in different cities? Do you work two jobs? If you're in different cities, not much you can do. If you work two jobs...could you have found a way to see her a bit more? Maybe a compromise, where you go to her place and wake her up after your second job, and spend two hours with her before sleep? Maybe this could have been a wednesday thing? Discuss ideas for compromise, next time a lover indicates there is a problem. Even if you don't change, the fact that you're discussing their concern means a lot. Your handle makes me wonder if you're on lithium. If so...sometimes lithium numbs a person. This can be difficult on the SO, because you seem cold to them when you're numbed. i am NOT suggesting someone stop taking lithium, if it is the only med that works for them. I am saying that if this is the case, make sure to communicate on this topic with a future SO. If you're not actually on it...uh, never mind. Seeing her more...quite likely wouldn't have solved anything. Two years is a rough point for an R, people sometimes just get bored and uninterested at the 2 year point. Little things that bothered them add up over time; at 2 years you'll get dumped for things like leaving a sponge in the sink, after washing dishes. Look for more areas that you didn't compromise, try to understand why not, and next time try to compromise more. And remember that she quite easily could have left, anyway. If a woman was ready to have sex with someone else that quickly...it means her heart has already left you. I would suspect she had just moved on, for no particular reason. World! Summers! Could you two PLEASE just add the other to your ignore list?
Author LostOnLI Posted April 4, 2011 Author Posted April 4, 2011 I like your interpretation LI stands for Long Island, not Lithium I only saw her on the weekends because I work about 50 hours a week and go to school for my masters degree. After I got home around 7, I would do some school work and by the time I finished it would often be 11-12. She lives an hour away, so even if I went to work from her place the next day it would leave me with about 4 hours of sleep. Lost: creative criticism Why did you only see her on weekends? Are you in different cities? Do you work two jobs? If you're in different cities, not much you can do. If you work two jobs...could you have found a way to see her a bit more? Maybe a compromise, where you go to her place and wake her up after your second job, and spend two hours with her before sleep? Maybe this could have been a wednesday thing? Discuss ideas for compromise, next time a lover indicates there is a problem. Even if you don't change, the fact that you're discussing their concern means a lot. Your handle makes me wonder if you're on lithium. If so...sometimes lithium numbs a person. This can be difficult on the SO, because you seem cold to them when you're numbed. i am NOT suggesting someone stop taking lithium, if it is the only med that works for them. I am saying that if this is the case, make sure to communicate on this topic with a future SO. If you're not actually on it...uh, never mind. Seeing her more...quite likely wouldn't have solved anything. Two years is a rough point for an R, people sometimes just get bored and uninterested at the 2 year point. Little things that bothered them add up over time; at 2 years you'll get dumped for things like leaving a sponge in the sink, after washing dishes. Look for more areas that you didn't compromise, try to understand why not, and next time try to compromise more. And remember that she quite easily could have left, anyway. If a woman was ready to have sex with someone else that quickly...it means her heart has already left you. I would suspect she had just moved on, for no particular reason. World! Summers! Could you two PLEASE just add the other to your ignore list?
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