gracielou8 Posted April 1, 2011 Posted April 1, 2011 I am having such a hard time coping with breakup. My bf of 6 1/2 years broke up with me in December and even though I am better than I was, I am still absolutely devastated. I found out that he had started dating a girl that I work with not long after the breakup. We worked in the same office with this person for a little over a year, and he got another job shortly after he broke up with me. Fortunately, I will be starting a new job in a month. Both of us have been through some pretty rough times the past few years and I now realize I had probably been mildly depressed for the past 2 years. I really loved him (and a part of me still does although I shouldn't), and I saw myself spending the rest of my life with him. I am absolutely crushed, but see zero hope in getting back together. He has moved on, and seems to not understand why after almost 5 months, I havent moved on either. He has brought this up at multiple times over the past few months when we have talked. Our lease on the apartment isn't up until October so we have been living as roommates, although I don't see him much at all. Just a few minutes a day maybe. We have a significant amount of debt we accrued together during some rough times when I was out of work on two separate occasions when I was injured and had to have surgery. Our accounts and bills are still together until we are able to pay down some debt and divide things up easier. I know that I wasn't putting my all into the relationship at times over the past 2 years (neither was he), but I didn't realize until after he broke up with me and I started to really reflect on the past few years. Every time I go to work I am reminded of the situation because I see the new gf. I feel that I won't even be able to start healing until we can live apart. Even then, we still own a home together out of state that we won't be able to sell right away. I'm probably going to have to have contact with him for the next 1-2 years or until we can sell the house and pay off all our debt. He was my first really serious relationship, and I didn't date much prior to meeting him. These emotions are foreign to me and I'm having such a hard time dealing with them. My previous few breakups, while difficult, did not cause me so much anguish. We had moved to a new state about 1 1/2 years ago so I don't have many friends, and those I do have are mutual friends. Its just such a horrible situation. Im sorry for such a long post, but I just need to get this out. I'm trying to move on, and I know I will find someone who will love me for who I am and treat me with the respect I deserve. I just feel like I take one step forward and two steps back.
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