Adi Posted April 1, 2011 Posted April 1, 2011 Hi, its a long story, but after years of being with the wrong people i finally met the one, we fell in love and had 4 amazing years together, we traveled all over and planned our life together. But one night we had a big fight, and a week later she left and broke up with me, i did get her back but we were on and off for about a month, then she broke up by letter, a few days later i found out that when we were on and off she just seemed to have one night stands, four in total with old school friends. I found a letter too one guy saying how depressed she was and how she was on anti depprssion tablets, i reached out too her about 3 weeks after we broke up, and we got back together, it killed me tho, thinking of her lying too me and having sex, but i tried and tried so did she for a year we tried too move forward but it never worked. I broke up with her, i kinda needed space, but after a week she just went mad againn this time joining a brif encounter site, and just meeting strangers for sex. we have been broke up for about 10 months but i still love her, i think she still loves me she seems too have big problems with depression and unralstic goals for life, i hate what she has done but i know i can never be in love with anyone has much again. Any advice would be good, i have dated lots, 38 dif dates but i still think about what we had.
smudge21 Posted April 1, 2011 Posted April 1, 2011 Feel you pain there, but do you think this could be more of a case of you putting this girl on such a high pedastal that now, even through all her lies, you can't even reach up to take her off it? I don't doubt for one second you feel she was the one, hell, I still think that about my ex. We were so right for each other, but she too had issues and was very insecure. I refused to see those bad points and could only see the good. Even now, whilsts I'm on NC, I still find it hard to focus on the bad times, only ever the good. I will also say that my recent ex was my third 'the one'. Each time it just feels so right that no one else could ever replace them, but when things end and feelings die, you find that there is life beyond them... and that 'the one' is really still out there waiting to be found. You can't change this girl to be how you want her to be and by thinking you can then you'll never move on, but that's what you really need to do.
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