Leigh 87 Posted March 31, 2011 Posted March 31, 2011 I have read about dates going really well, where one of the people gets such a great feeling about things... only for the other person to never call back. Normally the guy. HOW, I want to know, can a person feel SUCH a great connection, if it is one sided? I mean, I know it is hard to tell what another person is feeling or thinking, but surely it is a little odd, for ONE person to get a realllllly good feeling from the other person, when the other person is NOT feeling it? I would like to think that I, personally, KNOW if I am sitting with a person who does not even like me that much....... Although some people have bubbly personalities and are naturally affable and come across as though they like every one. I would like to think I could pick up if the person was naturally out going and nice to every one, that I would STILL be able to recognize if there was a " spark". Although, I guess there is not always a spark at first that is that apparant. The guy I am seeing now, I only realized there was something there when I looked back over it. We developed feelings because we got to know each other more. I guess what I am asking your opinions on, is: HOW come I hear about so many people, getting such a grat feeling from their date, when the date doesn't feel it back? I thought attraction, when it is strong, is mutual; after all, if a guy is NOT at all into you, isnt it obvious that there is no great spark or connection?
Author Leigh 87 Posted April 1, 2011 Author Posted April 1, 2011 COme one people! Surely there are a lot of you who had experience, with having a person you feel you get along great with, only for them to not reciprocate the feeling? And also in a relationship - if u feel a certain feeling when u are with the guy, it feels obvious to me if they share the feeling..... For instance: guy I am seeing, when I see him after not seeing him in a few days or a week, I feel happy, I smile, and I just get this feeling that I do not feel towards people I am not sexual or have a relationship with. It just feels so obvious when the feeling is mutual; I can just feel it from the person, at the same time I am feeling it? I probably have a lot to learn, as I have not dated guys since this guy, for years.
Eternal Sunshine Posted April 1, 2011 Posted April 1, 2011 This never really happened to me. I can read people well and every nuance of body language, tone of voice, look in their eyes etc... I have had instances where things went REALLY well on the surface, but there was something very small about the date that made me feel like the person is not calling again and he didn't. That being said, I can get paranoid by reading too much into texts, text lag etc but that is without the context of seeing them in person.
Romeofud Posted April 16, 2011 Posted April 16, 2011 I have read about dates going really well, where one of the people gets such a great feeling about things... only for the other person to never call back. Normally the guy. HOW, I want to know, can a person feel SUCH a great connection, if it is one sided? I mean, I know it is hard to tell what another person is feeling or thinking, but surely it is a little odd, for ONE person to get a realllllly good feeling from the other person, when the other person is NOT feeling it? I would like to think that I, personally, KNOW if I am sitting with a person who does not even like me that much....... Although some people have bubbly personalities and are naturally affable and come across as though they like every one. I would like to think I could pick up if the person was naturally out going and nice to every one, that I would STILL be able to recognize if there was a " spark". Although, I guess there is not always a spark at first that is that apparant. The guy I am seeing now, I only realized there was something there when I looked back over it. We developed feelings because we got to know each other more. I guess what I am asking your opinions on, is: HOW come I hear about so many people, getting such a grat feeling from their date, when the date doesn't feel it back? I thought attraction, when it is strong, is mutual; after all, if a guy is NOT at all into you, isnt it obvious that there is no great spark or connection? Leigh, I've read over some of your posts complaining about men not seeing you or paying attention to you, etc. I know this is off topic but I couldn't reply to your other posts because they lock out after a month or so. I really wanted to email you and talk about this further & we can, so drop me a note at [email protected]
oaks Posted April 16, 2011 Posted April 16, 2011 I have read about dates going really well, where one of the people gets such a great feeling about things... only for the other person to never call back. Normally the guy. I thought it was normally the girl who never called back, but I suspect we both put some bias into our observations! HOW, I want to know, can a person feel SUCH a great connection, if it is one sided? I think it's possible to have a great evening and genuinely enjoy it and enjoy the person you're on a date with and then when you get home have an "Is he/she for me? No. Oh well. Never mind." conversation with yourself. Glad to hear that you're seeing someone. How's it going?
utterer of lies Posted April 16, 2011 Posted April 16, 2011 I thought attraction, when it is strong, is mutual; after all, if a guy is NOT at all into you, isnt it obvious that there is no great spark or connection? Unfortunately not.
SincereOnlineGuy Posted April 17, 2011 Posted April 17, 2011 Let me guess: If we plotted dating scenarios on a graph, then would we determine that "As the 'numbers' associated with their physical attractiveness get further from one another, the more likely will be the scenario that you describe". Two college students, each "7.3" on the seeming beauty scale... would either hit it off, and have truly thriving conversation all night, or both would be quite understanding of each having had a less-than-ideal time. Whereas, if a prom queen @ 9.0 on the beauty scale went out with a 5.7 guy... of COURSE it is more likely that the guy will be smitten while the girl doesn't give a passing thought to a 2nd date. And it doesn't really matter which of the pair has the upper hand on the beauty scale... it is highly likely that the other will be the person who perceived having a much better time than did the one with the upper beauty hand.
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