Write your list about why you don't want them back here

[Popondetta]

Okey! Alot or most of the members on LS are here because they/we are very hurt. Many of us wants our ex's back, me included. I was the dumpee, but I also see some dumpers regretting what they did (gives me hope my ex will regret... unfortunately), and wanting the person they dumped back.

My suggestion is that in this thread we can write all the negative things about our ex's and the relationship. This will make us focus more on why it wasn't good enough for us. Because let's face it; We think of our ex's like gods and godesses. Please let us make them human(trolls) again!!

(Sorry about my bad english,- I'm danish)

 

Okey, I will start;

 

1.You're not a great kisser

2. You didn't make me feel attractive

3. You smoke pot

4. You hardly ever wanted to do the things that I wanted to (like going hiking, making plans to do fun things together, hanging out with my friends)

5. You are moody

6. You're not even happy with yourself so how can you bring more happiness to my life.

7. You hardly ever complimented me on anything, even in the beginning when I know you were in love with me

8. You left me when I needed you the most

9. You have skinny legs and arms

10. Your back is hairy

11. You never did anything extra to impress me

12. You have commitment issues

13. I had to bring food for breakfast if I was to stay over at your place

14. I bought us plane tickets to rome for your birthday You gave me nothing for mine

15. On our first date you asked me how many brothers I have. I replied 2 You asked me the same question on the next date.

16. You never asked me about my sick relative or how I'm feeling about the situation

17. You never made me feel interesting

18. You think that you're interesting when you have monologues about boring stuff

19. You're not in touch with your feelings in general and you even admittet it

20. You're 33 and you play computer games

21. I am a cute and funny girl/woman and you don't realize it or appreciate it

22. You never ONCE had a really good laugh with me (and not with anybody else either)

23. You're way too self-conscious and insecure

24. You're paraniod

25. You left you ex for the same reasons you left me (commitment issues)

26. You hang out with younger people

27. You have unrealistic thoughts and meanings about so many things

28. You will never grow up and be a real man and take responsability

29. You weren't even man enough to break up with me ("I'm confused, I don't know what I want, I love you but maybe not in the right way, go live your life and be happy but wait for me another couple of months, I'm SO confused, I miss you, I have to let go but I might think in 2 months time that it was the biggest mistake of my life")

 

Why on earth do I love you and want you back?! Not sure actually and I realize I will have to focus on this list go get me moving forward.

Edited March 31, 2011 by Popondetta
addition to list

[Feelin Frisky]

1. Split personality

2. Split personality

3. Split personality

4. Split personality

5. See 1 through 4

[lapse]

1. He lied

2. He threatened to "throw my **** outside"

3. He criticizes me and anyone or anything I love or respect

4. He can't even use proper subject/verb agreement to do #3

5. He called countless times a day to talk about severely monotonous stuff... I mean really... that's his idea of stimulating?

6. He played WoW 7-12 hours a day

7. He didn't do anything and wouldn't pick up after himself

8. He didn't follow through on anything he started ( " )

9. He was never satisfied

10. He was completely negative, but would never offer solutions

11. He blamed me for all of the above... dude's a wuss

And too damn needy. And never supportive - he'd make these subtle insults... like when I was finishing my Master's while working 60 hours a week. Bastard.

 

I can't even remember the list of why I stayed... other than I thought it was easier financially (it wasn't really) and I was used to the way his body felt beside me in bed. Ewwww. The stay reasons were clearly before I moved out.

[TryingtoUnderstand32]

I hated my ex's snobby friend whom shall remain nameless (Claudia). This woman had her nose so far up in the air and it KILLS me to know she will probably tell my ex bf he is better off without me.

[Lil1]

LOL! Well I don't want my ex back because I am completely over him but I'll contribute cuz this is a fun thread :

 

1. You never got a job in the 2 years that we lived together. No, selling pot is not a job.

2. You never helped me with rent in the 2 years we lived together.

3. You spent all your days playing Call of Duty, watching porn, smoking pot, and generally behaving like a high school loser.

4. You always wanted head but never returned the favor unless I explicitly asked you to.

5. Your back is hairy.

6. You have thin lips and big teeth.

7. You never took me out on dates because you never had money.

8. You crashed my sister's car and never paid her for the damage.

9. You constantly wanted reassurance that you are a 'stud'.

10. You did not know who you are and what you want out of life and expected me to somehow figure this out for you.

11. You walked out on me after all the love, all the sacrifice, and all the concessions I had made for you. But in the end, you did me a very big favor, so thank you!

[OhioLaw1987]

OH MAN....I will limit this just to the MAIN things that make her totally horrendous:

 

1) You are boring, unless you count being a lunatic as a "hobby," in which case you are really interesting.

2) You have the most miserable taste in music of all time. Pink is not one of the best artists of all time, thats just not even arguable.

3) You smoke cigarettes and it makes you smell.

4) You are too tense.

5) You don't understand sarcasm

6) Your personal cleanliness always grossed me out.

7) You snore.

8) You only care about law school.

9) You are scary behind the wheel of a car

10) You cheated on me

11) You cheated on me

12) You cheated on me

13) You cant handle your alcohol

14) You never even met my brother (he lives an hour away)

15) You dont like Ohio State.

16) You were emotionally abusive towards me

17) You have "painted me black" after i was SO good to you.

18) You lie

19) You are two-faced

20) You refuse to help yourself address the problems that will ultimately lead to you living a sad life, and its really heartbreaking to see someone as wonderful as you, at the core of your person, drown like that

[SingVoice]

LOL I had so much fun reading this I decided to post!

 

1. You are incredibly selfish.

2. You smoke pot WAY to much.

3. All your friends are losers.

4. You have no future.

5. Your house is disgusting.

6. You have really LARGE HAIRY feet.

7. You had some weird brown marks on your teeth.

8. You are stubborn.

9. You treated me like ****.

10. You wouldn't make me a priority.

11. You used me for money/food.

12. You aren't educated and act like it.

13. You have an arrest record.

14. You never clipped your toenails. (Seriously they would get SOOO long).

15. You CONSTANTLY complained about your health but did nothing about it.

16. You never complimented me.

17. You treated me like **** in front of my family and friends.

18. You never supported me.

19. You never lifted me up when I felt down.

20. You drank too much. (Every freaking day).

21. You are selfish and lazy and thats why you are 30 years old and have nothing going for you.

[fleur_de_me]

1) You spend more time looking in the mirror than you do looking at me

2) You play with your damn iPhone when we're out to dinner

3) You have a good job, but you are irresponsible with your money. You flushed thousands of it in the stock market playing options.

4) You want me to hang out with your friends, but you don't want to hang out with mine. You don't even want to meet them.

5) You know what the stock market is doing every second of the day, but you probably don't even remember my brother's name, where I went to university, or any of the details of MY life.

6) You aren't a good singer, but you think you're a musical genius. The videos you post on youtube are crap. Just stop. You're not good.

7) You promised you'd always be there for me, and you weren't there when I needed you the most.

8) You made me feel bad about wearing a 2-piece bathing suit around your foreign fobby friends because you didn't want them looking at me and thinking I was a whore.

Edited April 1, 2011 by fleur_de_me

[Fufu]

I have 1 thing to say only.

 

1. You don't value me anymore.

[ReturnToSender]

Oooh good one! Okay, lets see what I can come up with, considering I still have strong feelings for him I hope my list isnt too lame:

 

1 - You cheated on me

2 - You lied to me

3 - You were sad I found out, and sad I was hurt, but never showed regret

4 - Youre always complaining about something, anything, everything!

5 - ...

 

Man this is hard...lol Even his complaining never really bothered me to be honest, its just him venting...so thats just something I added to the list so that I have something else to add.

 

Really, that he cheated, lied and only feels bad that he got caught are the things that I dont like about him...if it wasnt for that, I have no complaints at all. Argh man...argh!

[Ginger Beer]

Reading some of the lists, especially about the men, make me feel sick.

 

Why on earth would you be attracted to a man with poor hygiene?

[Popondetta]

Reading some of the lists, especially about the men, make me feel sick.

 

Why on earth would you be attracted to a man with poor hygiene?

 

Yeah! Isn't it crazy that we want them back?! In my heart I alwasy just remember the good things and what I miss about him, so I thought it would be time to focus on why we shouldn't want them back, and focus on finding someone that's better for us next time. I think OhioLaw1987 writes about a girl with poor hygiene actually....She sounds quite charming...

[Jerrica]

1. you have no ambition

2. you start projects and never finish them

3. you threatened to kill my dog during a fight

4. you punched holes in the walls of my home that I now have to fix

5. you have screamed in my face

6. you call me names and verbally abuse me

7. you cheated on me

8. you lied to me many times but always find a way to blame me

9. you spend your day on facebook

10. you always try and one-up everybody to make yourself look better

11. you only have grade 9 education

12. you are irresponsible

13. you are just a little boy who needs to grow up

 

but for some reason, I still love you.

[silic0ntoad]

I have 1 thing to say only.

 

1. You don't value me anymore.

 

 

+1.

 

been a long time since T and I Broke up, but I guess I can try to contribnute:

 

1. You don't know how to communicate.

2. Your sex drive is abysmal.

3. You're extremely selfish.

4. You build lives to destroy them.

5. You fail me.

 

I guess everything else aside, that's all I can remember, but the ex that drove me here suffered from the above... It sucked.

[betterdeal]

1. I am improving my self

2. I don't have the energy to deal with your pain

3. I don't trust you

4. I don't like how much you self-medicate

5. I don't like that your main hobby is men

6. I don't like cocaine

7. I prefer sex to be a two-person production instead something I do to you

8. I won't be manipulated

9. I never respond to anyone who tries to use sex as weapon

10. I am pleased to not be a bit-part player in the home-made drama

11. I dislike your abusive parents intensely

12. I'm not your previous big love

13. I'm not your father

14. I know when you're trying to deceive: even if it isn't technically a lie, it's a lie

15. I am pleased to not have to be subjected to the mood swings

16. I am pleased to not have to be subjected to the double standards

17. I am pleased to not have to be subjected to the attempts to ferment guilt in me

18. I don't believe in astrology

19. I'm glad to not have to visit the doctor to get warts removed

20. I'm glad to not listen to you bawling your eyes out on the phone to your ex

21. I sleep better

22. I eat better

23. I owe you nothing

24. I don't need you, never have

25. I'm happier without you

[silic0ntoad]

18. I don't believe in astrology

 

 

I despise astrology. Since when can the stars tell me what's going on in my life?

 

Lame.

[lapse]

This is a great thread!

 

Oh, I dig the shift to the "I" statements, too!

 

*I don't believe in him any more

*I'm not excited by the idea of having him in my life or my future

*He has no self-discipline and his breath stinks all the time

[optimistgirl]

Ok, here goes....

 

1. You're a grown man who can't even stand up to your own mother.

2. It was hard to have a conversation with you.

3. You hardly ever cracked a smile.

4. Your answer about everything was always..."I dunno"... "Maybe"..."I guess" Often found myself wondering "Well, what the heck do you know!"

5. You were miserable because you hated your job and it showed.

6. You were completely insensitive.

7. You didn't believe in celebrating holidays.

8. Assumed I wasn't the type to like flowers on Valentine's Day. (For the record... I DO)

9. Had no hopes or dreams. When I asked you where you saw yourself in 10yrs...your answer was, "I dunno........not be at my job anymore." Big surprise.

10. You have ear whiskers.

 

Phew....felt good to get all that off my chest. I need to read this list over and over again until I can get him out of my head and out of my heart!

Edited April 1, 2011 by optimistgirl

[ShoeGurl1973]

1. You never did any little things for me

2. Your breath stank

3. You never contributed to groceries

3. You lied about having an ex wife and a child

4. Immature sense of humor

5. You play too many video games

6. You don't care how you dress

7. You never took me to nice places to eat when you knew I liked it

8. We hang around mostly your friends

9. You don't help around the house

10. bad with finances

11. low self esteem

12. verbally abusive

13. angry drunk

 

 

 

and still i miss him like crazy...WTF?

[ALonerAgain]

1. I want to become a healthier person, starting from the inside.

2. I need to be honest with myself - and that includes the reason/s why I fell for you in the first place.

3. I deserve respect - but I can only get that if I respect myself first.

4. I need to learn how to value myself, for and by myself.

5. I want someone who is emotinally open and available to share themselves with me.

6. I want someone to share life's obstacles with me and not be a 'fair-weather partner'.

7. I want a partner whose words match his actions.

8. I want a partner who says what he means and means what he says.

9. I want a partner who's not living in denial.

10. I want a partner who's accepting of himself and all his flaws.

[butterfly2011]

OMG..this is hilarious... I love it.. I will post mine later. LOL

[ALonerAgain]

1. I want to become a healthier person, starting from the inside.

2. I need to be honest with myself - and that includes the reason/s why I fell for you in the first place.

3. I deserve respect - but I can only get that if I respect myself first.

4. I need to learn how to value myself, for and by myself.

5. I want someone who is emotinally open and available to share themselves with me.

6. I want someone to share life's obstacles with me and not be a 'fair-weather partner'.

7. I want a partner whose words match his actions.

8. I want a partner who says what he means and means what he says.

9. I want a partner who's not living in denial.

10. I want a partner who's accepting of himself and all his flaws.

 

 

11. I want a partner who sees me as a healthy equal, not a surrogate mother; potential 'care-taker'; 'dream woman (!)'; 'someone to take care of'; 'baby machine' or any other label he cares to (subconsciously) slap on me.

[Feelin Frisky]

1. You take betrayal of trust into new dimensions

2. You can't have me look like a GQ cover boy and have us engage in comfort eating every night at the same time

3. You took all the joy out of giving flowers by damn near demanding them all the time

4. You made me the entire focus of your existence and expected me to live your expectation at every small turn as if I don't have a life of my own

5. I don't know who screwed with your head as a youngster but I am not him and do not deserve to be treated as him

6. You do nothing but blame everyone for everything that makes you feel anything but what you want to feel and never take responsibility for the negatives you bring on yourself

7. You embarrass me by dressing like a junior high school girl and acting like one some days. You dress too butch on other days.

8. You get these ideas in your head to give me things that YOU want--not what I want--and then throw a fit if I don't act like I'm overjoyed with every one of your choices. All I want is for us to be patient with each other and get through some time without grounds for contentiousness. Wanna give me something? Don't give me anything but the benefit of the doubt.

9. You stop what you're doing before the end of my orgasm which makes even great ones disappointing and you still "drop the ball" even after I've tried to work this out with you many times. I don't get it.

 

 

I have another ten I'm sure I can throw on the fire.

Edited April 1, 2011 by Feelin Frisky

[kbme311]

1. You didn't see me, just what you wanted.

2. You were crap in bed.

3. You didn't believe in foreplay

4. You didn't believe in female orgasms

5. You were boring to be with, all you wanted to do was watch TV 24/7

6. You went out with a drug addict who made porn and thought that was something to show off about.

7. You used my place to save on money then went to see a girl you fancied but didn't have the balls to ask out.

8. You lead me on pretending you wanted a relationship when all you wanted was somewhere to sleep because you weren't happy where you lived.

9. You told me intimate details about your sex life with your ex girlfriend's which I didn't want to hear and can't stop visualising.

10. You weren't into sex only playing out masturbation porn you watched.

11. You didn't take me anywhere, not once, in all the time we were together.

12. You didn't buy me a gift in all the time we were together.

13. You never told me I was special.

14. You never told me you loved me.

15. You didn't like kissing.

16. You worked in a supermarket.

17. You said cruel things.

18. You didn't have the balls to tell me the truth.

19. You've bad mouthed me to everyone saying I'm a psycho because you didn't want to talk about your selfish behaviour.

20. You said you wanted us to work but did absolutely nothing whatsoever in order for that to happen.

21. You never did anything for me except cook me an omelette once under duress.

22. When I was unemployed and you were working, I paid for the food we ate and the for the times we went out.

23. I think the worst thing you did was take money from me when I had barely anything to live on in order to see a girl you fancied and are now dating.

24. You were never transparent about what you did. You insisted on living in a cloud of mystery so I never knew where the hell you were or how to get in contact with you and it worried me sick. You told me I was a psycho because I hadn't heard from you in a couple of days and was worried.

25. You shoved me away when I wanted a hug all the time, you said you didn't 'do' affection.

26. You said everything that was wrong was my fault.

27. You told me to buy a teddy bear if I wanted to hug and kiss something.

28. You told me to shut up so you could listen to tv adverts.

29. When I asked for more sex you said, "Why would I want something that I can have any time I want?"

30. You were still in contact with your ex porn druggie girlfriend and didn't tell me.

31. You were chasing girls on facebook when you were telling me you wanted a serious relationship.

 

 

I'm sure I can think of more...

Edited April 1, 2011 by kbme311

[Popondetta]

4. I need to learn how to value myself, for and by myself.

5. I want someone who is emotinally open and available to share themselves with me.

6. I want someone to share life's obstacles with me and not be a 'fair-weather partner'.

7. I want a partner whose words match his actions.

8. I want a partner who says what he means and means what he says.

9. I want a partner who's not living in denial.

10. I want a partner who's accepting of himself and all his flaws.

 

I think I can relate to these...I want the same things, and my ex will never be able to give me this. Why the f%& do I want him back?!?! I just want someone who can hold me and make me feel safe!!