MissVegas Posted March 31, 2011 Posted March 31, 2011 My ex boyfriend and I broke up on NYE. Many things led up to our breakup but the breaking point was when he ditched me on nye left me at home crying when i asked to spend it with him and got completely hammered was shirtless all night in the club and puking on himself *facebook videos were posted*. Anyways he showed NO remorse for this and even deleted me and all my friends off facebook within 2 weeks of me calling it quits, never apologized etc. Has been partying hard ever since. We booked a vacation and when we broke up I told him we could not go on the vacation if he did not actually fully work things out with me and go to counselling etc. I set up boundaries and laid it down what it would take and he basically said nope I don't want to do any of that didn't want to work things out, showed no remorse for anything he did, turned it around on me and basically didn't lift a finger to do anything in regards to us. So I told him we couldn't go on the vacation and told him it's transferable and cancellable. Then I did not hear from him for about a month NC I texted him just to make sure he got all the money back from the trip and everything because the cancellation date had passed and he tells me he didn't cancel it. I told him I did not understand this as I laid out what I need and he told me he didn't want to work it out or make the effort so why would he not cancel it. He said because I never told him specifically to cancel and because I was the one who wanted to book the trip and go in the first place. *When I was with him I suggested it because it was a good price and he said he wanted to go there, i always pay for my own trip*. I told him I did not understand why he thought we could go on vacation as he has not called me, seen me, barely texted me, apologized or even lifted a finger in regards to reconciling ANYTHING with me but expected us to go on vacation together? His reply was that "you treat me like i have all these problems but i don't It's u that has a problem with me". I told him he could transfer it still but he claims nobody wants to go and "i wanted to go with you.." He's demanding that I pay him for my share of the trip regardless of whether i go or not etc. I think this is unfair as I expected him to cancel and he failed to communicate with me properly about it. He hurt me so so deeply and I feel so hurt, I was a great girlfriend, always there for him. I didn't want to break up but was more-so forced into it and then his actions afterwards of not caring in the slightest way cut like a knife. Am I wrong here? What ground do I have to stand on? Do I owe him money? Why would he make no effort to call me, see me, talk to me, apologize, or reconcile with me but expect to go on vacation? How would that even work?? I feel so confused and upset. I'm trying to heal. It's not even like he's being nice to me about it. I texted him asking if he found anyone to go as I was worrying and said "I'm f----ing working. I work during the day and I'm busy you can find someone and pay me all the money or just pay for yourself, it's up to you". How could I go on a 2 week vacation with this guy??
tryingtocurerj Posted March 31, 2011 Posted March 31, 2011 he sounds like a real douche-berry. Say good riddance to him for good and don't pay him a dime. You don't deserve that crap!
LovelyReds Posted March 31, 2011 Posted March 31, 2011 he sounds like a real douche-berry. Say good riddance to him for good and don't pay him a dime. You don't deserve that crap! I agree completely, He's a loser, you don't owe him anything. Don't let him bully you. Go live the better life you deserve.
TaraMaiden Posted March 31, 2011 Posted March 31, 2011 Advise him that the only way you'll pay him is if a court says you have to.
Author MissVegas Posted March 31, 2011 Author Posted March 31, 2011 Can a court make me pay?? Why would he act this way?!
Chi townD Posted March 31, 2011 Posted March 31, 2011 Was this vacation part of a package deal? Where is the location to?
Author MissVegas Posted March 31, 2011 Author Posted March 31, 2011 It's an all inclusive package to a warm destination all inclusive hotel flight etc
Dust Posted March 31, 2011 Posted March 31, 2011 No he can't make you pay. Don't tempt him to sue you though, you can sue for pretty much anything. (doesn't mean it will work out for him) You should have seen this comming, isn't this the reason you broke up with him.
Chi townD Posted March 31, 2011 Posted March 31, 2011 If you invested money into this vacation, then you can try to get your money back. But, this guy sounds like a douche rocket and you're not gonna see that money again. However, if you blocked off the time off for work and if your finances are okay, book yourself a vacation. Go to a place that you've wanted to go! Once your booked then text him, "Fine, I'll go on vacation." Fly to your destination and have a great time. Sight see, lay out on the beach; enjoy yourself and relax!! When you get back and he starts blowing up your phone on why you ditched him just tell him, " I didn't lie to you. I went on vacation....just not with you." Okay, feeling vindictive.....sorry.
Author MissVegas Posted March 31, 2011 Author Posted March 31, 2011 I didnt pay him yet but i always pay for my share of vacations when we go. So he's demanding I pay him
Dust Posted March 31, 2011 Posted March 31, 2011 I didnt pay him yet but i always pay for my share of vacations when we go. So he's demanding I pay him Don't you dare unless its turning into such a big headache and you just want him gone.
Chi townD Posted March 31, 2011 Posted March 31, 2011 He's demanding?!?! Ummm...sorry...He's in no position to demand anything. You're not together. Demand that he go get bent!
TaraMaiden Posted March 31, 2011 Posted March 31, 2011 Can a court make me pay?? Why would he act this way?! No, that's the whole point, it couldn't. You advised him in good time and asked him to cancel. So he wouldn't get past first base. What I meant was, tell him to go the legal route and see how far that gets him....they'd laugh in his face.... He's entitled to Zip. nada. Zilch. And that's all you really should give him.
Dust Posted March 31, 2011 Posted March 31, 2011 No, that's the whole point, it couldn't. You advised him in good time and asked him to cancel. So he wouldn't get past first base. What I meant was, tell him to go the legal route and see how far that gets him....they'd laugh in his face.... He's entitled to Zip. nada. Zilch. And that's all you really should give him. Never ask some one to sue you. Even if frivolous it would be a head ache. I’d stick with ignoring him.
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