Feelin Frisky Posted March 30, 2011 Posted March 30, 2011 First... Not every guy has to conform to YOUR standards of paying in order to be quality. Crap, I've met guys that think paying means they have a right to do whatever is necessary to get laid. Besides... had you actually read a bit further you would realize they are not even dating... and she just got out of a relationship and doesn't want to date him right now... she just wants him to buy her stuff. Rule of thumb: if you think your post is going to amount to a lecture of one Feelin Frisky think again before doing it. You've already etched your place into my permanent shi+ list and nothing you ever say seems to make me want to back off on it. Who says anyone has to read every post before remarking on the OP in the thread? I gave my two coppers on the subject in general. You CAN'T correct me so why bother unless it's just to be the hemorrhoid you've shown yourself to be to me further? I have nothing ever to say to you and do not jump on other people's posts to try to establish myself as some kind of righteous "corrector". So do us a favor and just move on if things don't meet YOUR standards.
interfuse Posted March 30, 2011 Posted March 30, 2011 Rule of thumb: if you think your post is going to amount to a lecture of one Feelin Frisky think again before doing it. You've already etched your place into my permanent shi+ list and nothing you ever say seems to make me want to back off on it. Who says anyone has to read every post before remarking on the OP in the thread? I gave my two coppers on the subject in general. You CAN'T correct me so why bother unless it's just to be the hemorrhoid you've shown yourself to be to me further? I have nothing ever to say to you and do not jump on other people's posts to try to establish myself as some kind of righteous "corrector". So do us a favor and just move on if things don't meet YOUR standards. I agree with this part.
Untouchable_Fire Posted March 30, 2011 Posted March 30, 2011 Rule of thumb: if you think your post is going to amount to a lecture of one Feelin Frisky think again before doing it. You've already etched your place into my permanent shi+ list and nothing you ever say seems to make me want to back off on it. Who says anyone has to read every post before remarking on the OP in the thread? I gave my two coppers on the subject in general. You CAN'T correct me so why bother unless it's just to be the hemorrhoid you've shown yourself to be to me further? I have nothing ever to say to you and do not jump on other people's posts to try to establish myself as some kind of righteous "corrector". So do us a favor and just move on if things don't meet YOUR standards. I'm on everybody's shyt list... so get in line. It's nice to pay... but it really doesn't show or indicate anything in general. I've been guilty of not reading a thread before posting too. Just like you it leaves me... Feelin Foolish.
zengirl Posted March 30, 2011 Posted March 30, 2011 The only reasons I can think of are: (1) He doesn't really think of you as a girlfriend; he is just killing time until he meets someone else, so he doesn't want to waste money on you. (2) He is trying to make some sort of political statement through the way he treats you. (3) He is an incredibly cheap bastard. None of them say anything good about him. The main issue here is that you seem to have very different ideas about money, and that's never a good thing in relationships. I'd still stick with this explanation even after oh-so-many pages. Women must be compensated for all those many thousands of years of living under Man's repressing hand. No thanks, I'm good. I mean, I want my equal pay (this country does still have issues there) and my right to do what I want with my body and maybe maternity leave to be worked out a bit better (only developed country with no paid maternity leave, not that paternity leave would kill us either) and such, but I don't need some guy to make up for what his father or some other dudes his father's age (and older) did. It's true, we aren't that far away from sexism and the glass ceiling isn't truly gone yet, though. We should keep working on that a bit, but not by making things unequal in the other direction. I really wish people would stop putting words in my mouth =\. I would like for us to progress into a relationship slowly and he is on that page with me. We both want to go slow. I don't WANT him to buy me stuff. That's not my goal. I just think it's polite to offer once in a while. I treated him to a drink at the bar. I like treating people sometimes...people that I like. Totally reasonable in my opinion. I'd be pretty shocked if a guy never offered to buy me anything, especially if I'd grabbed him a drink. I just don't know many good guys like that. (Unless I made vastly more than him or something.) Assuming the guy should pay every time or something is very different from saying, "Hey, it's weird, he's never even offered to grab me a drink."
Jynxx Posted March 30, 2011 Posted March 30, 2011 Rule of thumb: never pay for anything over 5$ unless you had sex. Keeps you from looking like you want her to owe you something, keeps golddiggers at a distance and saves you a decent amount of money that would've been wasted on girls wasting your time in the long haul.
Jynxx Posted March 30, 2011 Posted March 30, 2011 Give far more education to women. Give far more money to women. Women must be compensated for all those many thousands of years of living under Man's repressing hand. I was unaware there were women who are living under anyones hand for a thousand years. I agree they should get special treatment. As for those under 100, I don't
jane100 Posted March 30, 2011 Posted March 30, 2011 It's the truth. How many of those 15 year old girls were really interested in being married to a 40 year old man? If they were caught with the guy they wanted, they would be left homeless and their children would be taken away from them. All of the relationships up until the 20th century(1970) were nothing more than a business transaction, with women providing sex and children and the men providing a house and money. That's what the patriarchy does. It completely takes a woman's right to select her partner and makes her 'bond' with a man she wouldn't be interested in if the possibility of her having her own, independent life, was there. Women with the money to let the evil patriarchy behind do what nature intended them to do: they select what is best for them. Not what is best for men. I don't know where you're from but what you have in your favour Mr Cairo is that those First World Dorks, in particular Musemaj and WayneBrady in their pure and ignorant light. Plus what you say here, its so self-evidently true but still remains a revolutionary thought. As far as a "stingy" man goes (as opposed to a bit careful). Its a bad sign however you slice the ham. I suspect the OP will find this out ...
Author chelle21689 Posted March 30, 2011 Author Posted March 30, 2011 People people! Let's stay on topic and stop talking about history! LOL private message eachother!!!
fishtaco Posted March 31, 2011 Posted March 31, 2011 Lead by example and offer to buy his coffee sometime. I bet he'll return the gesture. If not, then I might start to be annoyed. I like this. I don't like to pay for women because some women are users. They pretend to like you so you'll buy them stuff. From a guy's perspective, we can't tell until it's too late. But I do it anyway because of tradition, so I try to minimize this as much as I can. So if a woman offers to pay, then I will return the gesture, plus she would have earned extra points with me. Sure, some guys would then assume the woman isn't into them. But at this point, I'd have respect for her no matter what, and then I'll figure out the interest part later.
waynebrady Posted March 31, 2011 Posted March 31, 2011 I don't know where you're from but what you have in your favour Mr Cairo is that those First World Dorks, in particular Musemaj and WayneBrady in their pure and ignorant light. Plus what you say here, its so self-evidently true but still remains a revolutionary thought. As far as a "stingy" man goes (as opposed to a bit careful). Its a bad sign however you slice the ham. I suspect the OP will find this out ... He also said that women should get all the education, and all the money and that men should be punished and women compensated for the last couple of thousand years. You think thats true too? If so you are a misandrist just like him.
musemaj11 Posted March 31, 2011 Posted March 31, 2011 By the way, gas is $4.05/gallon where I live. Didnt she say that he is always the one driving her around? Its funny that people who get to ride on someone else's car never seem to realize that the car's owner has to pay for the gas and its not free. Anyway, this guy is not cheap. He is indeed a smart one. Obviously he has no problems giving to important women in his life such as his mom. I think the guy realizes that he is a good catch and has had experiences drawing gold diggers in the past.
Author chelle21689 Posted March 31, 2011 Author Posted March 31, 2011 He doesn't always drive me around. He picked me up probably 3 out of the 4 times we've been out. He usually offers to pick me up though. Anyways UPDATE: So he wanted to go ice skating Friday. He bought tickets $9. He sent me an email to buy one but the deal closed. We found out that the $9 was good for TWO adults...and then he mentioned, "Oh good! That saves us both money and we could split!" -_- Wow
fishtaco Posted March 31, 2011 Posted March 31, 2011 He doesn't always drive me around. He picked me up probably 3 out of the 4 times we've been out. He usually offers to pick me up though. Anyways UPDATE: So he wanted to go ice skating Friday. He bought tickets $9. He sent me an email to buy one but the deal closed. We found out that the $9 was good for TWO adults...and then he mentioned, "Oh good! That saves us both money and we could split!" -_- Wow Look. Some women are actually okay with this. If you're not, and you expect the man to pay, that's not uncommon, and you have the right to want what you want. But that means you should date someone else. Because you DON'T have the right to make him pay when he doesn't want to. There are plenty of men out there that will pay for you. I know guys that will pay for you just by introducing you to them as my friend. And even though this is the first time you've met, they'll pay for you no matter if they're even romantically interested in you or not. Go find one of those guys. They're out there.
Author chelle21689 Posted March 31, 2011 Author Posted March 31, 2011 I looked at his newsfeed and his cousin thanked him for stopping by and buying her a waffle bowl sundae. Soo he seems generous with close family. Noo this is the 7th time we have met lol Honestly, if I knew why then I wouldn't be bothered. But I don't want to ask because it sounds really rude
xpaperxcutx Posted March 31, 2011 Posted March 31, 2011 He doesn't always drive me around. He picked me up probably 3 out of the 4 times we've been out. He usually offers to pick me up though. Anyways UPDATE: So he wanted to go ice skating Friday. He bought tickets $9. He sent me an email to buy one but the deal closed. We found out that the $9 was good for TWO adults...and then he mentioned, "Oh good! That saves us both money and we could split!" -_- Wow LOL who splits on 9 bucks? I think this guy is just clueless if not stingy.
Author chelle21689 Posted March 31, 2011 Author Posted March 31, 2011 See...I'm glad someone gets it. LOL X(
xpaperxcutx Posted March 31, 2011 Posted March 31, 2011 I looked at his newsfeed and his cousin thanked him for stopping by and buying her a waffle bowl sundae. Soo he seems generous with close family. Noo this is the 7th time we have met lol Honestly, if I knew why then I wouldn't be bothered. But I don't want to ask because it sounds really rude If you're already turned off by his non- gestures, then by all means go ahead and talk to him. I know some very stingy people but I don't date them.
Author chelle21689 Posted March 31, 2011 Author Posted March 31, 2011 If we get further into a relationship officially I'll ask. If we decide to be friends...I'll ask...LMAO!
xpaperxcutx Posted March 31, 2011 Posted March 31, 2011 If we get further into a relationship officially I'll ask. If we decide to be friends...I'll ask...LMAO! Either way, it's a win-win for you. I have a question though, has he always been the one to initiate dates? Usually the one who offers the dates pays.
interfuse Posted April 1, 2011 Posted April 1, 2011 I don't know why he won't pay for you. It seems rather odd. If he's nice all around, it's odd that he doesn't offer to pay. Usually guys like him (from what you described) offer to pay. Something's up.
DreamerGirl27 Posted April 1, 2011 Posted April 1, 2011 Try this on for size... a guy who DOES pay for you, asks you to pay for him sometimes, who has said he's NOT interested...
SummersEve Posted April 1, 2011 Posted April 1, 2011 (edited) Okay Chelle, I think I get it now. I bet he is being overly cautious about being used. You say you are somewhere between friends and romance? Probably he has been used like that before or is going on advice from others, on how not to get played. And he is following that advice so very closely that it's really almost funny. Like don't we all know, that three dollars he holds onto will make the difference between him being friendzoned or drooled over by you, lol. Let us know, hey? Edited April 1, 2011 by SummersEve
LeaningIntoTheMuse Posted April 1, 2011 Posted April 1, 2011 Maybe he believes in equal rights. I don't know?
Author chelle21689 Posted April 1, 2011 Author Posted April 1, 2011 Summer's Eve..LMAO!! I mean, I told my closest friends and everyone LAUGHED! It's very weird...he is like so polite and it's just THIS little thing... Like I said, one day I will find out why he's bein so funny with this. Haha, I wonder if he'll ask for the 50 cents if I'm short!!
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