butterfly2011 Posted March 30, 2011 Posted March 30, 2011 HE is such a jerk.. Other names come to mind, but I will refrain. So he is playing games with me so I am finally sick of it. I care about him but I care more about myself. My feelings don't deserve to be hurt anymore. If he wanted to come home he could have and well he hasn't. We talked this morning and of course if someone talks to him when I am on the phone, he tells me to hold on....can't I be center of his attention once. Instead he then says I have to go, I will call you back in awhile. I know he won't. He text me saying "please understand me and that I do love you." CRUMBS...... So I told him to prove it cause I'm tired of being strung along and chasing crumbs. He wrote back" whatever" So I went there,,,yes I did.... I said you will miss me when I am nowhere to be found and he said...sure i will?? I replied yet again saying fine then dont miss me. If you dont want me soemone else will. So he said he will go and pick up the rest of his things today. I said do what makes you happiest and he said ok. I'm done being treated the way he treats me. I have treated him awful and i am going to say its because I am not getting what I want out of this relationship. He is not the family man type but he thinks he is. He is no longer my best friend..... he pretty much got me where he wanted me and then pulled an ole switch a roo on me. I wasn't madly deeply in love with him for almost 2 years.... I loved him but it wasn't like it is now to where I hurt for him. He used to be so nice to me and compliment me and tell me how much he wants to marry me and have a family. He talked me in to this relationship and when he got it, this is what I get when I give him what he asked for. WOW..... I feel like a dumba** right now. I lost ME in this. AHHHHHH... NC is difficult when you love someone so much, but I tell you what....he deserves it now and it is what I have to do to figure out what I need and want to do. Please keep me in your positive thoughts so that I can build the strength to get through this NC. I really deserve better than this. IF you knew me, really knew me and him, you would agree that he is making a huge mistake.
ShatteredReality Posted March 30, 2011 Posted March 30, 2011 I don't have any advice for you...but best of luck to you! I hope you're able to keep up NC and move forward with few scars!!
Fufu Posted March 31, 2011 Posted March 31, 2011 butterfly2011: You can do it Remain NC and you will walk away from this unpleasant situation.
Trovador Posted March 31, 2011 Posted March 31, 2011 NC is hard even when you don't love the other party, so you are for a treat... but in the end, when you are able to say "how in hell could I stand that jerk" or "what was I thinking" you'll know that all that effort was worthy... Or who knows, maybe it won't be hard at all...
Author butterfly2011 Posted March 31, 2011 Author Posted March 31, 2011 Thank you. Yes NC is super difficult and I love him but he is playing games with me. He needs to mature obviosuly as do I. I am ashamed of myself for allowing myself to stoop to his level of maturity. He of course keeps sending texts to me.....first he said he is going to pick up the rest of his things, then he wants to work things out, but he still hasn't showed his face. He wants to keep arguing and placing blame on me for the situation we are in. I don't want to move on, but I know deep down it is best that I do. I've done what I can to show him I was sorry and that I want to work it out, but he is getting comfy with where he is and maybe that is for the best. There is really nothing I can do to get him to see how he is behaving...and he is too old to behave this way and I am not the woman to be treated this way. Love is forgiving but he wants to keep playing the game so he can stay away as long as possible. I guess he is having fun. Can't control anyone but myself and little does he know the decision isn't solely his. I can walk away at anytime and he will be sitting there feeling like a fool because he thinks I am going to accept him whenever he decides the time is right for him.
Recommended Posts