Lucky555 Posted March 30, 2011 Posted March 30, 2011 My guy and I have been together for 4 months. He has not really taken me out on dates as he doesn't have a lot money to be spending. However I have been making him dinners for over a month at my expense. I travel to see him at my expense. He doesn't want to go out and it's beginning to be a bit boring. In bed he seems to have got lazy and impatient almost. He used to be attentive and would do what if it took..now he Is as I have stated. This has happened for a good month now. I wonder what I should be expecting at 4 months..he doesn't ever say anything that expresses emotion and this concernes me. It also seems lately he has been getting bothered by me when I am just being myself. What should I be expecing by now in our relationship? Also I would think he would be expressing himself a bit More. I'm bothered by his lack of initiation lately and him being bothered.how can I see icebox relationship is legitimate? I'm concerned because it's early and I would think he and I would be closer emotionally.
musemaj11 Posted March 30, 2011 Posted March 30, 2011 Give as much as the other person willing to give. If you have $1000 and you give him $500, expect him to be willing to give you $50 if he only has $100. Dont let yourself be used and taken for granted.
Kelemort Posted March 30, 2011 Posted March 30, 2011 Been there done that. I stayed in a relationship for a year and a half that started out sort of like this. At first he was all interested, attentive, romantic, etc. We were going on dates, he was paying for outings and dinners, etc. And then, after about a month or two, BOOM. That was all over. Suddenly I was paying for everything, always driving to go see him, taking him to school, taking him to work and picking him up from work, etc. It's just not worth it. That relationship was over a year before it officially ended. I was just too afraid to break free and see it. I think we just realized that ultimately we weren't a good match for each other. He withdrew and decided to become a selfish jerk, and I struggled to make it work and threw everything I could at him. He didn't deserve it. So stop what you're doing. See if he makes any effort for you. If he doesn't, you have your answer.
Author Lucky555 Posted March 30, 2011 Author Posted March 30, 2011 Ya I'm actually going to stop what I'm doing. He makes more than I do and can't even order a pizza?! He could say he would do that but he doesn't want to! In the beginning he did take me out, brought me to the store to pick out food I like. Now it's like he won't even ask me out! I have done enough. I'm happy with myself and life. I have told him all my interests and he had made no effort. It's now down to me traveling and cooking and him just eating and laying on the couch! It's not fun. I don't even use my dresses in my closet! I don't wear my heels because by the time I'm done traveling and cooking I'm exhausted! Just not feeling like he treasures me or my time! It's like he has it made. I'm not going to be a doormat and I wil have fun on my own. Like I said he's not very expressive when we are apart either. So going to back off and see what happens. It will or won't work. I'm already dissatisfied for a month with this.
ChessPieceFace Posted April 4, 2011 Posted April 4, 2011 What you should be expecting is whatever you expect. Think about that one. Not everyone is the same, obviously you want more attention than you're getting. You aren't wrong for wanting that. It's just what you want. To take a guess, based on the small sliver of info you've posted filtered through your own personal bias in reporting info -- it seems like he's "not that into you." Or, he takes you for granted. Don't force him to read minds. We don't have that ability. Tell him why you're unhappy. If that doesn't change anything, just break it off / say you want to be apart for a while and see if THAT changes anything. That doesn't seem that hard to figure out, maybe it's just me.
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