teamtrek15 Posted March 29, 2011 Posted March 29, 2011 My and ex and I broke up about 2 months ago. We went on a vacation to Spain 2 weeks after we broke up. It was planned long before we broke up. She still wanted to go and we had a great time, we were intimate and it was like we never broke up, and I really thought we'd get back together by the end of the trip. Well I never had the guts to ask her to get back together after the trip but she said it was the best vacation she'd ever been on and basically stuck me in the friend zone once we got home and never hinted to wanting to be back together. i decided I couldn't handle that friend zone and sent her an email telling her I think we should go no contact for awhile. She said she was hurt by that but if I felt it was better she'd be okay with it. Her bday was last week and I sent her a short and sweet happy bday email and she replied saying it meant so much to her that I reached out and she hopes everything is well. I have a lot of great photos and I even put together some awesome video footage of our trip to Spain. I want so bad to send it to her because before we went no contact the plan was for me to send it all over when I'm finished editing it. I'm not looking to win her back with this video and photos but maybe it could be a start of us talking again and taking it from there. Should I send the photos and video to her? I love her and miss her so much.
utterer of lies Posted March 29, 2011 Posted March 29, 2011 Don't contact her. At all. You have no reason to. Unless of course your looking for some free pain and suffering.
Author teamtrek15 Posted March 29, 2011 Author Posted March 29, 2011 so you don't think I should send her the footage of our vacation?
utterer of lies Posted March 29, 2011 Posted March 29, 2011 so you don't think I should send her the footage of our vacation? No. It's simply a reason you found for contacting her.
Kelemort Posted March 29, 2011 Posted March 29, 2011 This girl has no interest in getting back together with you. You were companionship and sex during a romantic vacation, and that seems to be it. Obviously we're not seeing the communications, but it sounds like her messages to you are brief and generally nondescript ("Thanks for reaching out, it means a lot to me.") Is she sending you long, opining messages? Are you hearing from others that wants to get back with you? You told her you wanted to go no contact and then you completely violated it. I'm assuming that telling her you wanted to go no contact was an effort to get her to say, "Oh, no! I'm so sorry! Let's get back together!" And then it didn't happen, so you switched tactics. I'm assuming she's the one who did the breaking off. And the only thing I can tell you is this: she's not interested. I think at this point you're wasting your time and your breath trying to get her attention. Just let it go. Stop talking to her. Find your own interests and hobbies. If you aren't working, find a job. Hang out with your friends. Start dating other girls and move on.
Author teamtrek15 Posted March 29, 2011 Author Posted March 29, 2011 This girl has no interest in getting back together with you. You were companionship and sex during a romantic vacation, and that seems to be it. Obviously we're not seeing the communications, but it sounds like her messages to you are brief and generally nondescript ("Thanks for reaching out, it means a lot to me.") Is she sending you long, opining messages? Are you hearing from others that wants to get back with you? You told her you wanted to go no contact and then you completely violated it. I'm assuming that telling her you wanted to go no contact was an effort to get her to say, "Oh, no! I'm so sorry! Let's get back together!" And then it didn't happen, so you switched tactics. I'm assuming she's the one who did the breaking off. And the only thing I can tell you is this: she's not interested. I think at this point you're wasting your time and your breath trying to get her attention. Just let it go. Stop talking to her. Find your own interests and hobbies. If you aren't working, find a job. Hang out with your friends. Start dating other girls and move on. I went no contact because I felt it would be less painful then being just a friend. She was the one who broke it off with me. Of course I want to get back with her but the purpose of me sending the video footage is to at least rekindle our friendship. She is a special part of my life. I do work abd have been with friends a lot and went on a couple of dates but I do miss the friendship. She didn't want no contact at all and if it wasn't for me saying that we would be friends. Her response to my bday wish was very positive and it was a paragraph long but I summed it up shorter before. I haven't heard she wants me back but heard she met some guy online who she totally digged and he wasn't feeling her back and she was pretty upset. That's through a mutual friend. And I heard she's thinking of moving to miami which would kill me! So I at least want to be friends again be4 she leaves
Survivor12 Posted March 29, 2011 Posted March 29, 2011 "I'm not looking to win her back with this video and photos but maybe it could be a start of us talking again and taking it from there." No matter how much you try to deny it by insisting that you only want to be friends, the truth is you still have feelings for her and want her back. Pretending otherwise to her while attempting to lie to yourself is simply a recipe for more pain. The fact is that she broke up with you and accepted your decision to end any further contact without attempting to change your mind. If she was interested in reuniting--or even in maintaining a friendship--she would have let you know. Your initial decision to go NC was a wise one. Spare yourself further anguish and frustration by upholding it. Trying to be a friend with someone for whom you still have unresolved feelings only prolongs the pain and prevents you from moving forward.
utterer of lies Posted March 29, 2011 Posted March 29, 2011 Honestly, you should just do it. Send her the footage, and add in a dedication at the beginning of the video while you're at it. Pour your heart out to her, lay out all your feelings, and put everything on the line. Please post what happens after. Evil...but potential for drama.
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