turokturok5 Posted March 27, 2011 Posted March 27, 2011 I didn't have any contact with her but some stuff happened which has made things pretty bad in my head again and i don't understand why. We were both at the same party and i was really drunk, but i had no intentions of talking to her. Later on my best friend finally admitts that he likes her but tells me he cared about me more and wouldn't put our friendship at risk and that he wouldn't ask her out. Later on hes hanging around her quite a bit. Afterwards, i hear him say to our other friend "i was just about to ask her man but she didn't seem keen" he said some other stuff too which guaranteed he was going to ask her out. I told him before, if they like eachother i don't want to be the one to stop them from being happy so he should go for it. It's just the fact that he told me he valued our friendship and wouldn't put it at risk, but tries to ask her out anyway. I got pretty pissed off and left the party, it was a 5 hour walk. I was texting the friend i mentioned before, he was telling me that my best friend was a dog, that i should fight him, i told him i just left and i shouldnt care, that my ex-girlfriend dogged me when we were dating and i should just get over it. After about an hour of walking a car pulls up next to me and my best friend gets out. I don't really remember much, but apparently i was abusing him, he told me my ex actually dumped me because i was too self-centered and it made me a bit more angry and i started to vent about how much i cared about her and that i didn't understand why. I've been pretty bummed about it all day, exept i started getting messages from friends asking me why i was so angry at the end of the night. One in particular, from my ex's best friend stated that i was "raging" about my ex, bad mouthing her etc and she was informed of this by none other than my best friend. I was feeling kind of resentful towards my ex, but i would never do anything to hurt her because i still care. Her friend told me that she was really hurt, but apologised straight afterwards saying "im sorry, i shouldn't have told you that she was hurt." I didn't really understand it. Anyway i explained how i wasn't angry at her at all, that i had sent her a message a week before apologising for how i had been acting and that there were no hard feelings so it wouldn't make sense for me to bad mouth her and i was angry at my best friend. I also talked to my other friend who was there when i was abusing my best friend, he said that i never said anything bad about my ex, i just said things like "im just so f**cking pissed off at myself because i can't get over her" and that i still liked her etc etc. Exept when he told me she dumped me for being too self centered i got pretty upset and started to talk about how much i actually cared about her and stuff. Anyway, i was drunk so i wasn't exactly thinking straight, but i know i didn't bad mouth my ex. I know this because i wouldn't want to hurt her and that my friends told me it wasn't true. Obviously my best friend has said something to her, because my ex's best friend informed me that he told her i had been abusing her. Screwed things up pretty badly, realised my best friend is an ass and i have to go away with him for 2 weeks soon, walking off without letting anyone know got my friends all worried and my ex, although i shouldn't care, probably thinks im pathetic and immature and will want nothing to do with me.
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