El_Enamorado Posted March 25, 2011 Posted March 25, 2011 Hey there people. Am new to this site. I like all the advice people give because am going through the same thing. I just want advice. Am doing good and am keepin my cool, but deep inside, it still hurts. Its almost 2 months since my ex GF broke up with me. I stayed away. I did the NC and it worked. I was with my ex for 2 years. Everything looked cool, but then it happened. She let me go and gave up on me. In those 2 years, ive been dumped over 40 times, seriously. I know its my fault for ALWAYS being there, but even though I would do my best to go see her and be with her, it wuz NEVER enough. Then she looked for me 2 weeks ago when I got back to town, cause I had left for a few weeks. We ended up kickin it again. She would tell me all these nice things, that she was always gonna Love Me, but we havent talked for over 3 days. Is she playing games with me to just have me there? People tell me to let her go, that I can do better. She looks for me when she wants. She acts like my GF when we are together, but when I try to get close to her, she rejects me and tells me that we are NOT going out. I know we are not, but why does she act like that? I think she is just afraid to let go. Incase it doesnt work out with a new guy, she thinks i'll be there for her. I dont get why people say that they want their EXs back, even after they left with another person. TO Me, thats like cheating. They leave U, they go mess around like if nothing happened, then return. Their excuse is: We werent together. To me, that is still cheating, even though people dont see it like that. If I was to do the things she does, she would understand me. Ive ALWAYS been straight to her and FAITHFUL. Does she want me like she says she does, or is she just playing games? I asked her why is she playing hard to get, and she said that she IS hard to get. I told her on tuesday is she wanted me around or not, so I can just do my own thing, and she said that she did want me around. She said she was gonna call me on tuesday after work, and she never called. Its Friday and still nada. I already got it. Why try to be in a place where am not wanted? When I kick it with her, she just judges me and tells me alkinds of negative things. She makes me feel like if am nada to her. Like if shes TOO much for me. If she is, why does she still look for me?
depplover_1980 Posted March 25, 2011 Posted March 25, 2011 You speak with some good morals in places, clearly knowing what is acceptable behaviour and what is not. Yet you allowed yourself to be toiled with and dumped approx 40 times. This woman has walked all over you, there is no chance of ever getting back in the driving seat without dramatically not speaking to her for months or playing by her rules. If however you are happy being someones toy, then I would just come out and ask her what she wants and if she's playing games. But I can tell you now, she has been playing games with you for 2 years.
Author El_Enamorado Posted March 25, 2011 Author Posted March 25, 2011 She hasnt been playing games with me all along neither, but just at times, shes just something else. She thinks that any choice she makes, is the correct 1. Yeah, u are right. I do feel like a toy. My friends tell me the same thing. I just tried and tried to prove my point and My Love, but it wasnt enough. Its ok, cause I know for a fact that SHE WILL REMEMBER ME. NO ONE is gonna do the things I did for her, and she knows it. Thats why she looked for me. She is playing games. She wants me as her puppy. I would express myself, and she would get mad and she would tell me to stop complaining. How is expressing yourself a complaint? Nice to meet U depplover_1980 =). Me llamo Jose and U?
Author El_Enamorado Posted March 25, 2011 Author Posted March 25, 2011 Am not gonna lie, at first, it was really hard. I have NEVER been this hurt. What doesnt kill U, makes U stronger 8). After we kicked it, we didnt go back. I feel a lil bad, but not like before. I think the danger already passed. My eyes are wide open now. The book that I read that made me a better person and made me see what Love really is, is "The Love Dove". Its helping me out ALOT. I know that when a new girl comes into my life, I already know what to do and what not to.
depplover_1980 Posted March 26, 2011 Posted March 26, 2011 Again NO ONE CLICK ON THE LINK! Telling Jose here he has a mental condition - f u c k off. Right Jose, it sounds like she is a motormouth who likes the sound of her own voice too much. Can you tell me what her good points are? I do have to say though telling you to shut up and putting you down IS ABUSE and your friends are right and deep down you do know you deserve better.
Author El_Enamorado Posted March 26, 2011 Author Posted March 26, 2011 She tried to change me. I did change for my own good. But she wanted to change me her way. She wanted EVERYTHING her way. I would ditch my friends to be with her. I missed ALOt of UFCs PPV, just to be with her. She would ditch me to go out partying. Shes just selfish. I know I deserve better. She tells me she deserves better. Thats a trip. But whatevers. Its her life. All I know, it ALL comes back. I would try to talk to her and fix things, but she would disrespect me by telling me badwords. Making me look bad in front of others. Screaming at me in front of her family and kickin me out of her pad. Like if someone did something to her, and she would take it out on me. I know that I have fault to. Am not just blaming her. It just gets me mad that she looks for me, messes with my head, there I am, then get the boot, AGAIN.
Author El_Enamorado Posted March 26, 2011 Author Posted March 26, 2011 She would tell me she wuz afraid of me maybe hitting her in the future. I dont roll like that. Am a MAN not a coward. She would hit me. And she knows it. When it came to violence, HER. Not Me. She gets mad when I would talk to her, cause truth hurts. Thats why people dont like hearing the truth, cause it falls on them. They blame us, and they leave with their hands clean. So in the future, they wont feel any guilt.
depplover_1980 Posted March 26, 2011 Posted March 26, 2011 Well it certainly seems like you have a realistic viewpoint on it all. Abusers of any kind always push the blame onto their victims because they are either sociapaths with no emotion, or they cannot deal with emotion. No one misses UFC, we have our homeboy Dan Hardy fighting tomorrow - there are not many to come out of the UK as you know. The history of what has happened stops right here with you, but you have to really grab your self esteem now and finally break free. Or this could run for years and years, each time it getting harder to break away. It is stopping you finding someone who will really love you and most of all RESPECT you, which as a man you totally deserve.
Author El_Enamorado Posted March 26, 2011 Author Posted March 26, 2011 I would ALWAYS miss them, just to satisfy her =). But o'well. I hope dan Hardy takes it. Thats how I feel. Am not trying to find me a new girl. I just want to be over all this to get back on track with my life. Am tired of games. Am tired of blames. I know that there are girls out there for me, but am just gonna take it slow. Patience =). What do u think about what I have told u about her? She acts like if she dont care, but then shes there. I really need to break free.
depplover_1980 Posted March 26, 2011 Posted March 26, 2011 Well I think she uses you for times when she is lonely, or she needs an ego boost, some attention. She probably likes having that power over you, so the minute you walk away she comes running back after you. But like I said, it is your decision whether to keep on walking. I think you are doing the right thing by wanting to be alone for a while, get your head straight and free of these past 2 very confusing years. Take time out to hang with your friends, watch as much sport as you want and then when you feel a little happier you can then date. But it is going to require some major inner strength and riding out the days you feel bad. I would ALWAYS miss them, just to satisfy her =). But o'well. I hope dan Hardy takes it. Thats how I feel. Am not trying to find me a new girl. I just want to be over all this to get back on track with my life. Am tired of games. Am tired of blames. I know that there are girls out there for me, but am just gonna take it slow. Patience =). What do u think about what I have told u about her? She acts like if she dont care, but then shes there. I really need to break free.
Author El_Enamorado Posted March 26, 2011 Author Posted March 26, 2011 Yup. thats what it is. She only looks for me when she is lonely and no one is around. Am already walking =). It hurts, but am strong. I cant let no one step all over me. Those 2 years were koo. Even though we had our ups and downs, I learned ALOT. This experience WILL make me a better person =). When 1 door closes, 3 doors open.
Recommended Posts