eerie_reverie Posted March 25, 2011 Posted March 25, 2011 I get so emotionally invested in my projects that when something doesn't go well, I can't talk about it without bawling. I am always bursting into tears during meetings. Yesterday I cried for for 2 hours straight during a meeting I had with my boss at 7 in the morning. He had to keep reassuring me that the issues I was having did not mean I was letting anyone down, that the whole team was there for me, that I should not be afriad to screw up, etc., but all those nice words just bounced off as I focused on the fact that I was failing at the one thing I am supposed to be good at, and cried harder. I know this behavior is unacceptable, but I think what's more disturbing is how invested I am that I even care this much. It's just a stupid job! I should not take it so personally. Has anyone gone through something similar? Any tips?
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johan Posted March 26, 2011 Posted March 26, 2011 I get so emotionally invested in my projects that when something doesn't go well, I can't talk about it without bawling. I am always bursting into tears during meetings. Yesterday I cried for for 2 hours straight during a meeting I had with my boss at 7 in the morning. He had to keep reassuring me that the issues I was having did not mean I was letting anyone down, that the whole team was there for me, that I should not be afriad to screw up, etc., but all those nice words just bounced off as I focused on the fact that I was failing at the one thing I am supposed to be good at, and cried harder. I know this behavior is unacceptable, but I think what's more disturbing is how invested I am that I even care this much. It's just a stupid job! I should not take it so personally. Has anyone gone through something similar? Any tips? No tips. I don't generally cry at work. I get a little pissed here and there. But maybe if you had more overall life balance, you wouldn't have your emotions so near the surface.
westernxer Posted March 26, 2011 Posted March 26, 2011 That would be a little disconcerting, to see someone crying in a meeting. Your comrades must freak out at this, unless they're used to it. Maybe you can try hating the job a bit more. Are you in a creative type position?
Author eerie_reverie Posted March 26, 2011 Author Posted March 26, 2011 (edited) That would be a little disconcerting, to see someone crying in a meeting. Your comrades must freak out at this, unless they're used to it. Maybe you can try hating the job a bit more. Are you in a creative type position? That is what I fear - that I am making everyone uncomfortable. Edited March 26, 2011 by eerie_reverie
Author eerie_reverie Posted March 26, 2011 Author Posted March 26, 2011 No tips. I don't generally cry at work. I get a little pissed here and there. But maybe if you had more overall life balance, you wouldn't have your emotions so near the surface. Life balance... I don't know how to get it. I think I'm depressed. I have no friends left and nothing sounds fun to me anymore.
SummersEve Posted March 26, 2011 Posted March 26, 2011 I've never had this problem so I probably don't fully get how it feels to you. I am assuming you've always been this way so correct me if I'm wrong. What came to my mind was when someone acts a certain way they're usually getting something out of it, a pay off. Not saying there aren't also negatives to it or that you'd even necessarily be aware of it. When you think about it, boss chews you out, you cry, that stops and he's patting your back, being extra nice to you and so is everyone else. So then following that line of thought, it does kind of work for you in a way? Would you say this was something that worked for you growing up? If so, I still don't see it as deliberate manipulation, but just a coping stragegy that has outgrown its appropriateness. I would consider therapy. Even if that's not it, it seems like the kind of thing they would know how to change. Good luck with it.
Els Posted March 26, 2011 Posted March 26, 2011 Make a conscious effort to seek pleasure in other avenues of your life. Gradually the investment will balance out.
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