brainygirl Posted March 24, 2011 Posted March 24, 2011 So I have finally accepted that the guy I like and have been seeing on and off for almost the past year probably will never like me in the same way. He sees me as a FB or friend with benefits and that's about it. I, on the other hand, have developed some strong feelings of attachment towards him. I'm trying to limit contact, because I don't want a FB or FWB relationship and I feel like continuing to have that contact with him will impede my finding the sort of relationship I want. I don't initiate contact. But if he texts or opens a chat window on facebook, I can't seem to just ignore them. Its not like he's a bad person, and I still like his humor and company. I've also started messaging another man I met online, who seems nice, gonna try to meet up for a real date this weekend. My questions for the forum: Am I being dishonest with either of them at this point? Guy one has made it pretty clear he doesn't want a relationship with a captiol R and guy 2 is still only a possibility. Am I somehow cheating or fooling myself if I continue to have contact with guy 1? (To give you a clue, I get stomach butterflies when I even see pictures of him on facebook). Or am I just too big a mess to deal with any of this right now?
Mr.Cairo Posted March 24, 2011 Posted March 24, 2011 So I have finally accepted that the guy I like and have been seeing on and off for almost the past year probably will never like me in the same way. He sees me as a FB or friend with benefits and that's about it. I, on the other hand, have developed some strong feelings of attachment towards him. I'm trying to limit contact, because I don't want a FB or FWB relationship and I feel like continuing to have that contact with him will impede my finding the sort of relationship I want. I don't initiate contact. But if he texts or opens a chat window on facebook, I can't seem to just ignore them. Its not like he's a bad person, and I still like his humor and company. I've also started messaging another man I met online, who seems nice, gonna try to meet up for a real date this weekend. My questions for the forum: Am I being dishonest with either of them at this point? Guy one has made it pretty clear he doesn't want a relationship with a captiol R and guy 2 is still only a possibility. Am I somehow cheating or fooling myself if I continue to have contact with guy 1? (To give you a clue, I get stomach butterflies when I even see pictures of him on facebook). Or am I just too big a mess to deal with any of this right now? If you want a relationship and this guy doesn't want it the best course of action is to remove yourself from his presence. Those feelings you're speaking of are the result of the sex you have with him. I know that know it is kind hard to believe in, but if you go on with your life without having sex with him those romantic feelings and all will disappear. Go meet that second guy and see if he's interesting enough to make you want to spend time with him. Forget about the first one. He's not interested in what you are interested in.
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