SweetDaphne Posted March 23, 2011 Posted March 23, 2011 I've recently started dating a guy, whom I really like. We text often and talk on the phone. We have a lot in common and I enjoy hanging out with him. My question is this: he often states how he likes that I understand we're both busy and how I don't hound on him (like I assume other women have in the past) when he doesn't respond immediately to my texts. I have noticed over the course of the time we've talked that he'll text back quickly, and then at times, not for hours. I normally think this is because he's busy, at work, or just not around his phone. But I'm now wondering, because he's mentioned it several times before, am I being naive, or does he really just not respond quickly to texting and appreciates that I don't hound him about it? Just trying to get a general idea of what people think about it.
zengirl Posted March 23, 2011 Posted March 23, 2011 I've recently started dating a guy, whom I really like. We text often and talk on the phone. We have a lot in common and I enjoy hanging out with him. My question is this: he often states how he likes that I understand we're both busy and how I don't hound on him (like I assume other women have in the past) when he doesn't respond immediately to my texts. I have noticed over the course of the time we've talked that he'll text back quickly, and then at times, not for hours. I normally think this is because he's busy, at work, or just not around his phone. But I'm now wondering, because he's mentioned it several times before, am I being naive, or does he really just not respond quickly to texting and appreciates that I don't hound him about it? Just trying to get a general idea of what people think about it. I think you're making too much of this. He probably is just busy and not a person who likes to be as tied to their phone as some people. And he's probably had complaints in the past from tied-to-their-phones gals who read too much into an hour lag in a text or something. And he probably likes that this hasn't happened with you. And since it sounds like you really don't care so much about what the lags --- just what the lags could possibly "mean" ---- I wouldn't make them into an issue. They probably mean something very simple: He's not looking at his phone or he's busy.
cerridwen Posted March 23, 2011 Posted March 23, 2011 Unless he's given you some reason to doubt his integrity, take what he's said at face value.
Author SweetDaphne Posted March 24, 2011 Author Posted March 24, 2011 Thank you both for the advice. I will heed it and continue as I have.
Eddie Edirol Posted March 24, 2011 Posted March 24, 2011 Im the same way. if hes like me, he appreciates that you dont hound him for not texting you back right away. Theres nothing worse of a turnoff than someone who desperately needs to hear back from you right away about dopey small talk. People get paranoid and think youre avoiding them, when you know that if you KEEP texting them they wont stop when youre busy. if you tell them youre busy, they think youre blowing them off. He appreciates that you arent one of them. So keep it up.
Saphira Posted March 24, 2011 Posted March 24, 2011 No i think your looking to into it. Same thing with my ex. When we were together i understood when he was buisy like at work or something. so if he didnt text me back immediately it was ok with me. Cuz he would call later or something. the is nothing more unattractive or "needy looking" then someone who hounds them. someone who calls 20+ times in a row after not getting texted back lol. I would just keep doing what your doing and not hound him. If he mentions it then i think he just really appreciates your being understanding
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