Mixed28 Posted March 22, 2011 Posted March 22, 2011 It seems common that many of the users on here get dumped after 2 months. I got dumped after 2 months, Good Arms, turokturok5, lovelyladyland and a couple others. Why is this? It is kind of odd. Is the 60 day mark like a "can I see myself with this person in the longrun" thing? I kind of noticed this after lovelyladyland's post.
Cee Posted March 22, 2011 Posted March 22, 2011 Yeah, I think 2 months is when things get serious or fizzle. I've always been superstitious of the 2 month and 6 month mark. It seems like things unravel around then. Been with current BF for 7 and a half weeks now. Wooooo.
Author Mixed28 Posted March 22, 2011 Author Posted March 22, 2011 Yeah, I think 2 months is when things get serious or fizzle. I've always been superstitious of the 2 month and 6 month mark. It seems like things unravel around then. Been with current BF for 7 and a half weeks now. Wooooo. God forbid I get past the 2 month mark. I know in my next relationship when the 2 month mark comes around i will be crapping my pants probably
radrluv72 Posted March 22, 2011 Posted March 22, 2011 Just over 2 months for me as well...odd thing was that after the first time I went out with my ex, he started talking about the two of us taking a trip together. At that point I told him that I didn't want to get too attached because he was leaving for Afghanistan that upcoming December...well, it happened anyways. Two weeks before we left we had a talk about how happy we made eachother, and he offered that if I still wanted to see him when he came back, then we could. I agreed. But two days before he left, he dumped me. Freaked on me. I've spent more time trying to get over him than I was actually with him...funny how powerful love can be.
EmperorR Posted March 22, 2011 Posted March 22, 2011 2 months is usually when the honeymoon period wears off and people show their true colors.
Author Mixed28 Posted March 22, 2011 Author Posted March 22, 2011 Just over 2 months for me as well...odd thing was that after the first time I went out with my ex, he started talking about the two of us taking a trip together. At that point I told him that I didn't want to get too attached because he was leaving for Afghanistan that upcoming December...well, it happened anyways. Two weeks before we left we had a talk about how happy we made eachother, and he offered that if I still wanted to see him when he came back, then we could. I agreed. But two days before he left, he dumped me. Freaked on me. I've spent more time trying to get over him than I was actually with him...funny how powerful love can be. Yeah took me longer to get over then the actual relationship.
radrluv72 Posted March 22, 2011 Posted March 22, 2011 Yeah took me longer to get over then the actual relationship. I almost wish that he had done something to give me reason to hate him...like cheat on me or treat me like crap. Unfortunately, he treated me like a queen, and was someone who had everything I was looking for & more. So falling for him was probably unavoidable. I still miss him awful. I just wish he'd had a little more faith in me.
Author Mixed28 Posted March 22, 2011 Author Posted March 22, 2011 I almost wish that he had done something to give me reason to hate him...like cheat on me or treat me like crap. Unfortunately, he treated me like a queen, and was someone who had everything I was looking for & more. So falling for him was probably unavoidable. I still miss him awful. I just wish he'd had a little more faith in me. I know how you feel sucks so much. I agree with you on some level, my ex in high cheated on me and I was over her in less then a week! I was like well shes a slut and I don't want a slut! But with my latest ex who I LOVED and she and her friends know I adored her and when she left I cried like a baby and I NEVER CRY. Then 2 months later she has a new bf that hit me hard and it was only a 2 month relationship. My heart still skips a beat when I see her in person and she broke up with me 4 months ago. So I guess I am not totally over her like my exes in high school (we are both college freshmen) I am going to have to see her for the rest of college. She really was my first love and longest relationship which is kind of embarassing when someone askes whats your longest relationship and I say 2 months. I feel people think somethings wrong with me.
Good Arms Posted March 22, 2011 Posted March 22, 2011 Me too, 2 month relationship before things went wrong. Then 2.5 weeks of pure hell when she turned cold towards me and I didn't know what to do, until she eventually dumped me. And I've spent 4 months - double the relationship length - trying to move on (but seeing her at work is REALLY setting me back) and I can see I've got a LONG way to go yet The worst thing is I knew I was still early in building up confidence in being in a relationship. I think I'd have changed a lot, taken more of a lead as that confidence grew. But I have to recognise that we really didn't have too much common ground anyway. Plus she's not perfect (though my heart still puts her on a pedestal) - knowing I was an extremely shy guy from the start she could have maybe approached things differently when she wasn't happy with me. I couldn't help but get withdrawn and upset when she listed my faults and said something along the lines of "women don't find that attractive"... smashing my self-esteem in an instant. Seriously, why am I letting someone capable of that to dominate my every thought?!
Graceful Posted March 22, 2011 Posted March 22, 2011 It seems common that many of the users on here get dumped after 2 months. I got dumped after 2 months, Good Arms, turokturok5, lovelyladyland and a couple others. Why is this? It is kind of odd. Is the 60 day mark like a "can I see myself with this person in the longrun" thing? I kind of noticed this after lovelyladyland's post. Hey Mixed, Well, this being a breakup board, I guess we are bound to see trends, and while I always thought 3 months was the turning point in a relationship's progress, there does seem to be a trend at the 2 month mark. This may be due to the heightened sense of pressure that begins to creep in after a couple of months, but I think that this also speaks to the level of impatience that has crept into the consciousness of so many people when it comes to romance. I mean, some people will only go on one date and judge a perfectly nice person as "no sparks" and not even give them a second date, even if they've actually had a nice time. And some people will date for about 8 weeks and even if things are going well, decide that because they're not madly in love by then, the relationship isn't worth pursuing. I don't know for sure, but it just seems there are so many people in a rush to fall in love, they confuse the normal stages of a relationship (taking it slow and letting it grow as you get to know someone ... and let both people learn about one another so they can see if they really belong together) with a failure to feel a certain way waaaaay too soon. If there isn't an instant connection, that's a failure? Sometimes the most meaningful connections come after a period of weeks and months, they grow. It's like reading a book; sometimes you have to get through the first few chapters to get riveted, and then you can't put it down. Not all great books make you feel that way on the first page. In a recent experience of my own, with just a friend (not a romance, just a friendship with a guy that reached out to me), it seems that the 2 month mark has also been the turning point. Seemed to play games more and more and it got so confusing and unrewarding for me (and hurtful) that 2 months is just about all I could take. He's just hurtful, for no reason, and it's not even a romance. It seems like a short period of time when you look back on it, but your feelings can certainly get hurt by someone you've only known a couple of months. But try not to be too jaded about this. It's an interesting observation, but I don't think we're all doomed after 2 months (at least I hope not)
Author Mixed28 Posted March 22, 2011 Author Posted March 22, 2011 I mean, some people will only go on one date and judge a perfectly nice person as "no sparks" and not even give them a second date, even if they've actually had a nice time. And some people will date for about 8 weeks and even if things are going well, decide that because they're not madly in love by then, the relationship isn't worth pursuing. I think this might be the case with me and my ex. My ex told me "Your a great guy but I don't see it going any further" I was like WTF?! (did not actually say that) what the hell do you mean you don't see it going any further after 2 months? What do you see that would make it go further? Its all BS and I am embarassed to say this is m longest relationship. When people ask me what my longest is especially girls I feel the may think somethings wrong with me. And I kind of feel somethings missing from me. But yeah its not like we didn't go out and i even made here a trail date you know the go to here then here thing.
LD1981 Posted March 22, 2011 Posted March 22, 2011 yea seems its a 60 day trial period.. a money back guarentee should come with it too lol
lovelyladyland Posted March 22, 2011 Posted March 22, 2011 I almost wish that he had done something to give me reason to hate him...like cheat on me or treat me like crap. Unfortunately, he treated me like a queen, and was someone who had everything I was looking for & more. So falling for him was probably unavoidable. I still miss him awful. I just wish he'd had a little more faith in me. I know EXACTLY what you mean! This guy was perfect while we were together, I just wish he could have hung in there with me. The only reason I hate him now is that I saw him on the dating site we met on again last night. After only 2 days of being broke up. Guess he wasn't lying when he said he just didn't feel the same for me anymore. This whole thing is just so f**ked up. I wish I could just erase the memories. And maybe there is something to the whole 2 month thing. Maybe it is the time people think ''do I wanna commit to this person''. Unfortunately for me,my anxiety issues just came out a bit to early, before he made that final decision to be with me. Maybe if it would have happened a month later we would still be together. Oh well. Can't change it now.
Author Mixed28 Posted March 22, 2011 Author Posted March 22, 2011 a money back guarentee should come with it too lol Totally agree I feel I wasted a bunch of money on my ex I mean really all of this money spent only for you to leave me after 2 months? I was pissed. I know that may seems messed up but really it was not worth spending all that money for her to only stick around for 2 months.
turokturok5 Posted March 23, 2011 Posted March 23, 2011 I think this might be the case with me and my ex. My ex told me "Your a great guy but I don't see it going any further" I was like WTF?! (did not actually say that) what the hell do you mean you don't see it going any further after 2 months? What do you see that would make it go further? Its all BS and I am embarassed to say this is m longest relationship. When people ask me what my longest is especially girls I feel the may think somethings wrong with me. And I kind of feel somethings missing from me. But yeah its not like we didn't go out and i even made here a trail date you know the go to here then here thing. haha i didn't think my problem was that common...exact same thing with me hey. She told me i was the "nicest and sweetest guy she had ever met" and it definately wasn't my fault, we just weren't meant to be. She said i made her really happy, so why would she delete me from her life?
pianoman30 Posted March 23, 2011 Posted March 23, 2011 my last r'ship was 2 months and after nearly 2 months of solid NC I now realise my ex did the right thing highlighting I was too needy. It seems STR's are a lot more difficult to get back with an ex rather than a LTR where you have more cherished memories and a greater bond with someone.
turokturok5 Posted March 23, 2011 Posted March 23, 2011 my last r'ship was 2 months and after nearly 2 months of solid NC I now realise my ex did the right thing highlighting I was too needy. It seems STR's are a lot more difficult to get back with an ex rather than a LTR where you have more cherished memories and a greater bond with someone. i agree, the dumper seems to not want to have anything to do with the dumpee after a short term relationship. I ended with alright terms with my ex, her saying she really wanted to be good friends exept she actively avoids me now. Saw her today at college whilst i was studying in the library, her friend came up to me and was asking how i was and things, my ex just stood behind me. They ended up going to a different floor despite the fact there was tonnes of free sits on the floor i was on haha
takemedrunkimhome Posted March 23, 2011 Posted March 23, 2011 Just over 2 months for me as well...odd thing was that after the first time I went out with my ex, he started talking about the two of us taking a trip together. At that point I told him that I didn't want to get too attached because he was leaving for Afghanistan that upcoming December...well, it happened anyways. Two weeks before we left we had a talk about how happy we made eachother, and he offered that if I still wanted to see him when he came back, then we could. I agreed. But two days before he left, he dumped me. Freaked on me. I've spent more time trying to get over him than I was actually with him...funny how powerful love can be. I know exactly what you mean. relationship lasted 3 months, I'm not sure how lol. I'm still grieving and it's been 2 months! I don't think some understand how they've affected our lives and how much they mean to us.
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