3 years together she left me for another guy, 6 months on she is going through hell

[evilmonkey2008]

Hello all, I was with this girl for 3 years then she slept with another guy and left me for him. She totally broke my heart, anyway 6 months on we have been emailing! She hasn't told me any details, but she is going through a real bad time! At 1st I was like ha you stupid cow, and I had the opportunity to gloat in her face, but I didn't, I'm not that cruel! But then I want to her help her? But I think this is a bad choice, I think I should walk away as she ditched me! Any suggestions?!? Cheers

[TryTryAgain]

My ex came back to me after a new relationship didn't work out, but it was months after their split. It gave her time to get through her own grieving process. You should have no desire to help her unless ultimately all you want out of it is a friendship.

 

If you do have romantic feelings for her, I would politely say something to the effect of, "I'm really sorry you're going through a tough time, but seeing as how I still have feelings for you I'm probably not the best person to offer advice." An ex of mine just recently told me almost those exact words when I was trying to get over a different failed relationship. I thought the old ex was just a "friend" since she had broken up with me so long ago, but that very statement told me I had to be careful with how much I told her. I realized I was hurting her by crying on her shoulder.

[NXS]

Move on, she ditched you for this creep and probably loves the drama. You owe her nothing.

[Woggle]

If you help her out she will be back with him in no time. You are her backup and chances are she loves the drama. She wanted this and now she has it.

[D-Lish]

My ex came back to me after a new relationship didn't work out, but it was months after their split. It gave her time to get through her own grieving process. You should have no desire to help her unless ultimately all you want out of it is a friendship.

 

If you do have romantic feelings for her, I would politely say something to the effect of, "I'm really sorry you're going through a tough time, but seeing as how I still have feelings for you I'm probably not the best person to offer advice." An ex of mine just recently told me almost those exact words when I was trying to get over a different failed relationship. I thought the old ex was just a "friend" since she had broken up with me so long ago, but that very statement told me I had to be careful with how much I told her. I realized I was hurting her by crying on her shoulder.

 

I wouldn't give her the satisfaction of telling her you still have feelings for her.

 

Regardless of what she is going through now, she slept with someone else and left you for them. Regardless of how you still feel about her, she did something pretty terrible to you and she simply doesn't deserve your shoulder to cry on in my opinion.

[TryTryAgain]

Regardless of what she is going through now, she slept with someone else and left you for them.QUOTE]

 

 

EDIT...I guess I glossed over this part. I think I originally read it as, "she left me and then slept with someone else."

 

So, yeah. Don't listen to what I said. D-Lish is right.

[EmperorR]

your nothing but a emotional tampon, RUN. dont waste your time on people who don't appreciate you

[Movingthrough]

I wouldn't give her the satisfaction of telling her you still have feelings for her.

 

She made her bed, let her lay in it. Dont answer anymore emails, she is using you as someone to vent too even though she screwed you over. Hell no.

[fetish]

man, ditch that ho'. she's crying to you about someone she screwed you over with? what an insult! that should be an easy one

[pandagirl]

Dude, forget this chick! Why do ex's think it's ok to screw you over then expect you to be there for THEM? Bull crap.

 

You don't have to mean, but I'd seriously just ignore her, or tell her you have no interest in hearing her problems and to deal with them on her own.