I have no idea what in the world this girl is doing and what to think of this

[Kain Highwind]

Same girl as my past topics.

 

We were really close in the summer, I liked her, I thought she liked me, I took a long time to ask her out on a date. When I did, she had just started dating someone else. She got mad at me (since she told me right before I asked her that she went on a date with him the night before) and we didn't talk for a long time.

 

They split up about a month ago and we've been talking lately, its been going well, and then one night last week I asked her if she wanted to hang out this past weekend. Not a date or anything, just hanging out

 

She said that she really didn't want to right now because she wasn't comfortable with it yet because of what happened between us (which I could see, and I agreed)

 

But then she went on how she's not a trophy that I can win by taking her out to dinner or buying her a drink and that she wants me to respect her and our boundaries as friends

 

I said I did and I do and that even though I really liked her and really cared for her back then, I wouldn't mind being just friends.

 

Anyway, the next day, she texts me out of nowhere saying that she forgives me for what I did back then and that she's sorry for what she said. She kept on saying she was sorry and that she's just been angry and stressed lately and that she just needs some time to herself and that she'd be good with heavy prayer (cause of that last part, I sort of willingly semi-friend zoned myself just cause I've never heard her say anything like that and it sounds big so I told her I'd be here to talk to if she needed it)

 

Its weird cause she pulled like a complete 180 in personality and she texted me when she was supposed to be working. She always used to hate it when I texted her then cause she isn't supposed to but she was doing it no problem.

 

Could telling her that I cared for her have caused her to change her mind or something? We haven't talked since then since she said she wanted some alone time but I just can't help but be confused by this. It went from "I'm not comfortable seeing you right now" to "I forgive you and I'm sorry" and stuff like that over and over

 

And since she said she wanted some alone time, how long shoudl I wait before talking again?

 

She changed her stand in this in less than a few hours and its really confusing me

[Kain Highwind]

And I saw one of our friends today (one of her best friends), I told her about this (since its really weird to me) and she said the same thing. She said that sh'es never known her to act like this

[ChessPieceFace]

Could telling her that I cared for her have caused her to change her mind or something?

 

I've never known that to do anything but drive women further away. Slight awkwardness + saying you care = massive awkwardness.

 

She sounds loopy. If that's something you can deal with, then pursue it if you want. I can't read the minds of people I've never met, but if I would put on my Carnac hat and compare her to a girl I previously liked (she sounds to be about the same level of craziness and similar in how she acts towards you) then I'd say that maybe she believes this is the right "moment" or that you've given her a "sign" or somesuch nonsense.

 

Why does every dating situation seem like an exercise in abnormal psychology...

[Kain Highwind]

I've never known that to do anything but drive women further away. Slight awkwardness + saying you care = massive awkwardness.

 

She sounds loopy. If that's something you can deal with, then pursue it if you want. I can't read the minds of people I've never met, but if I would put on my Carnac hat and compare her to a girl I previously liked (she sounds to be about the same level of craziness and similar in how she acts towards you) then I'd say that maybe she believes this is the right "moment" or that you've given her a "sign" or somesuch nonsense.

 

Why does every dating situation seem like an exercise in abnormal psychology...

eh, well I did it. Didn't like make a point of saying it, just a passing comment

 

She's never acted like this before. She's acted completely normal

[Kain Highwind]

I DO know that she does have really bad stress problems (she takes anxiety meds) and since she said that, I'm thinking it was a stress problem, but I don't know if the fact that she completely changed what she said is good for me or not

 

and since she said she wanted some space, I don't know how long to wait before talking again

[Kain Highwind]

I know that this is probably too fairytale but I seriously believe this may be good instead of bad since I just made a passing mention that I really did care about her

 

She's had nothing but bad relationships (even though her last was good, it still ended abruptly and he sort of still dumped her even though it was mutual) so maybe that made her reconsider, hence the change

 

I doubt it, since that seems a little too romantic-movie but given how her others were... idk

[Kain Highwind]

I know that this is probably too fairytale but I seriously believe this may be good instead of bad since I just made a passing mention that I really did care about her

 

She's had nothing but bad relationships (even though her last was good, it still ended abruptly and he sort of still dumped her even though it was mutual) so maybe that made her reconsider, hence the change

 

I doubt it, since that seems a little too romantic-movie but given how her others were... idk

come on someone >_>

[Bridgey]

Heres my best guess as to what she's thinking:

She seems to value your friendship, but she's getting frustrated because you keep trying to date her. She's made it pretty clear she only wants to be your friend but you keep trying. That gets pretty annoying to us girls. But it sounds like she wants to keep you as a friend, which is why she apologized.

 

If you are honestly ok with only being her friend and -never- becoming anything more, than stay friends with her and stop trying to become her BF. Otherwise quit the friendship. If she wanted to date you, she would already be dating you.