Feeling lost about relationship break with gf

[MH8]

after over a year my gf decided she wanted a break saying that she was

stressed and moody and needed to find herself. she said she loves me and

we will remain faithful to each other. the first couple days we texted, then

she started to skip texting some days. then after 10 days we saw each other somewhere(we were both going to go no matter what) and i asked when the break would be over and she said she didnt know and i asked if shell get with any other guys and said no aswell. shes probably the most loyal person ive met so i guess i believe her.

 

we didnt talk for 5 days after that i texted her and said im willing to wait to be together again but feel left in the dark as to how much time she needs and she replied saying it means a lot to her that im still there for her and meant to text me but is just getting her act together, but pretty much evaded the question again it seemed.

 

its been 5 days after that, im contemplating texting again and bluntly asking for a time frame to make things easier, should I? I just also feel like i need some sort of reassurance that we actually WILL get back together because it seems like if she really did want to she would have by now and cant help but think that if it really was just about finding herself and stress that she wouldnt have to randomly decide no contact is in effect.

 

another thing that worries me is there was another guy that tried to hang out with her before the break(who ive met and knows were together) and he texted her asking if she wanted to hang out one day we were together without mentioning me even though hes met me first. she said he has a gf but said shed just ignore him, but recently she went to an event that he was at, i dont know if he drove her or not. should i be worried that shell fall for him?

 

any advice more than appreciated

[Eddie Edirol]

You absolutely should be worried. A "break" is the slow lead to a break up. Your girl broke up with you in her mind, and is too chicken to deal with you when she finally puts it down. In another week or so, she will be saying "lets see other people".

 

All her words are textbook, you can see it all around this site. When people say " i need to find myself" they mean "I found someone I want to start dating, but I need you there as a backup just in case it doesnt work out."

 

She isnt as loyal as you think. She has been thinking of breaking up with you for months. So you will have to start thinking of what you might have done to kill her attraction to you, because she will NEVER tell you. She will keep you on hold for as long as she can knowing you want her back. So you need to break up with her now, she isnt going to get back with you anyway. You need to trust me on this, its so common that its sickening. peopl are cowards and wont tell you how you are killing their attraction to them unless they want to work on the relationship. She didnt do that, she led you on until she found someone else she wanted to date. It could be that guy you are worried about.

 

I know you want to think that she is thinking about it, but she cant stand talking to you and bieng around you, she has made up her mind that she is done with you. So anything you do right now will not bring her back, women do not move backwards when they dump you, especially when she has moved on already. In a rare occasion they go back, but its never the same as the flame has died, and they wind up using you as the backup until she finds replacement number 2.

 

So right now, the thing for you to do is to ignore her texts, and never talk to her again no matter what she says. It will be hard, but you need that. She will ask why you arent answering, ask if youre mad at her, and it doesnt matter. if you tell her everything I said she still wont tell you what killed her attraction to you, because she thinks you will hate her, and women dont like to think that someone doesnt like her...cant deal with the guilt. its not about your feelings, its about her dealing with her guilt for lying to you all this time.

[MH8]

i do find that hard to believe. she has always been pretty honest. weve taken a 1 week break before with texting, right after somewhat of a fight. this time it was also a fight.