cookie7 Posted March 19, 2011 Posted March 19, 2011 Ok I am into my 8th day of NC and I need to vent so that I do not call him. So it probably best if I do it on here . Ok long story short my ex and I went together for 6 months very intense in the beginning we both fell head over heels in love (at least I did and he said he did) however the more we got to know each other the more we realized we were so very different and wanted different things in life......BTW we met in church I am very commited to my christian walk and he was not as committed as I was this was (not judging him) this was the problem between us. I wanted to live a certain way with certain values and he wanted to live a certain way however he made it clear to me that he was trying to improve his values and move closer to a more committed christian life. I accepted this and was willing to stand by him. Anyways he made it clear to me that he was staying with me because I was the best thing that ever happened to him. He also stated on several occasians that he would not be the one to mess up the relationship. Up to one week before our break-up he was telling me he loved me and showing me affection. A week later he flips on me, grows cold and says he has changed his mind about everything and wants us to be friends. I told him no and immediately went to NC......he called twice (I didnt answer) havent heard from him since. He is very stubborn so since I am not taking his calls he probably wont reach out again.....I really need to get this out so that I can continue to move on with my life.....I feel betrayed and as if he was lying the whole time we were together and Im hurt......I am very attractive, work out, outgoing, friendly and have no problem whatsoever getting another man..............its just sad because the one that I want doesnt want me.......anyways it is what it is and I have accepted it for what it is and have learned alot from this entire situation and I will be better for the next one.....this one just threw me for a loop. NC is great for your healing however it is not easy because we are human and naturally want to reach out to the person you have been in constant contact with.......Hang in there all that are in NC right now....any words of encouragment would be welcomed. Blessings to all Please excuse any typo's or grammar errors....
Hules Posted March 19, 2011 Posted March 19, 2011 Hey cookie, hang in there the first 2 weeks of NC were the hardest for me because as you said you just want to reach out to them. Though you must remember they are the ones who walked away, that is their decision and not ours. The best we can do is pick our selves up and keep our dignity by staying NC. My ex is extremely stubborn (so am I for that fact :\) so I know how you feel in that regard. Focus on yourself spend time with your friends and family. I know its hard now, I promise it gets easier though. Just remember that no one is worth giving your dignity away to. Also don't hide your feelings allow yourself to feel them and get it out of your system. Take care now *hugs*
Author cookie7 Posted March 19, 2011 Author Posted March 19, 2011 Thank you so much for the encouragement I really appreciate it. Its funny because I have been at this place before in past relationships and it wasnt this hard....this one is rough. And like I said its not like I couldnt go out and easily get someone else to drown the pain....I just dont want to do that and really dont want anything but friends right now. I know that I am already okay just working through it. Thanks and blessings.
Thatguyintx Posted March 19, 2011 Posted March 19, 2011 Some relationships are just more intense than others. I have to admit I was shocked at how my reaction to this breakup was much deeper than any other I had experienced to now. Frankly, it hurt even more than my divorce. That surprised me. You sound like you are doing great. Don't jump into anything else. Give yourself a chance to heal and really understand what just happened. You say you are a Christian. Give God a chance to work on your heart. He will show you things you hadn't seen yet. Blessings back to you!
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