chambers1517 Posted March 19, 2011 Posted March 19, 2011 I found out my wife of 12 years had been talking to an old boyfriend. I tried to kick her out and she wouldn't leave. We started counceling and are getting along well but she isn't showing remorse. We have been intimate and she was loving . I try to act indifferent but it is hard. I am working on things to make me a better person but I feel I am doing all the giving. She asks what's wrong sometimes and I say she isn't remorseful and she says if this makes us better then she is not sorry. The cell phones were in her name and she put them in mine. I also changed her number and she didn't care. We have no home phone and I cansee all her activity and she doesn't know. I think she is through with him but how do I get the remorse I need for me to feel better.
ver13 Posted March 19, 2011 Posted March 19, 2011 You can't get something from someone that doesn't want to give it to you. As far as she is concerned right now she isn't doing anything wrong. you can try and frame it in this way "How would you feel if it were I who was doing it to you". This may show her another side of the issue but there are no garentees. Her value system is different then yours she will have to be the one to make the mind shift and from the looks of what you are saying this may not happen. IMO you need to sit down and have honest conversation about relationship boundaries and what you need to feel comfortable about your M.
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