987 Posted March 18, 2011 Posted March 18, 2011 This is going to be long... but there's a lot behind this. I'm really confused and looking for input. It started 11 years ago and I dated this girl Amanda all through college 4 years. I broke it off because of several reasons, but mostly she was always getting "mad" at me and giving me the silent treatment because I worked too much - if it was working late, etc. The time we had together was great and it was something I regret doing and always have. We started to do the break-up/make-up thing with these fights... I ended it because of this. I date someone else, end up getting married for 5 years, which ended with her cheating and I divorced her. Amanda also got married and it ended in divorce for the same reasons... So fast forward to the time we both get separated (pre-divorce), about two years ago. Amanda contacts me on Facebook, we start talking again - friends only. We lived in the same city and she invited me out a few times, I was interested, but wasn't interested in anything until the divorce was over so I never did see her-made up stupid excuses, etc. Anyway, we talk periodically by email, etc for a few months. I got an opportunity for a promotion at work which included moving across the country to California - I took it. Right about this time, we hadn't been talking too much, if at all. I emailed her and told her I was moving a few days in advance and we met twice for dinner and drinks - it was a great time. I tried to keep talking when I moved, but she kept wavering with saving her marriage so I backed off. Now she is divorced. So now I have been her a year in Cali and she calls a month ago and says her sister just moved here, she's going to visit, and wants to meet for dinner. We meet (including her sister and husband) for dinner and had a great time. They joked around a lot about how things lined up like we should be together etc. We had a few drinks, go back to her sister's house, and she is all over me... really not what I expected at all, but great. Keep in mind she was a little tipsy. She invites me over the next day and we have dinner at her sisters, then the two of us go to a movie... She rejects every move I make. The next day (her last day there) we go sightseeing with everyone - I offer to take her to the airport thinking I could get some alone time to talk to her - I really didn't have any alone time the entire weekend as we were with her family. This is where it gets strange again... I really am having feelings for her, but at the same time I also need to get to know her again. So we are going to the airport and this is my chance. I ask her to come back again to see me, she says "I don't know" and kisses me goodbye. We talk when she gets home, and for the next few days constantly. It dies down a little bit with the talking, I didn't see it going anywhere and I felt like I was initiating the contact too much and possibly crowding her. She only calls me when out drinking since then. When she's drinking, she keeps telling me she wants to see me and wants me to come down, even started planning a trip which I was cool with. I decide that I won't commit when she is drinking, and pass it on to we will talk "tomorrow". Tomorrow was last Sunday. I text her Monday and say I have been looking at flights and what weekend was good for me to come down to see her. She responds and says she has to check that date... two days later she responds and says it's bad, she is away that weekend. I respond and say the next two weeks are bad for me, how about we plan something for next month. Her response is -ok-. That’s it... That's been over a week now and I never responded to that (not that I needed to), but that was the end of the conversation. I think I know my answer here, and that's to just walk away... but I just don't understand what's she's doing. She's interested, very interested when she's out and I know she's had a few drinks... I haven't contacted her since and I haven't heard anything from her at all since the -ok- message.
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