lawwal Posted March 18, 2011 Posted March 18, 2011 So I recently started doing LC with my ex to see if she'd come back. I just don't feel right flat out ignoring until she says she wants to get back together. I am at least making her wait and keeping my responses short and it seems to be having some kind of effect on her. Here's the latest.... Her: Did you get any of my mail? 24 hrs later... Me: Nope no mail Her: Thanks Later that night... Her: what r u doing Me (2 hours later): I'm out Her: Kona [name of a place..i think she was just guessing where I was] I didn't respond so she texts me like 15 minutes later.. Her: Ok what is up with the long waits between text. if ur not gonna text back don't text back 5 hours later. Her: Have a good nite dork I haven't responded and probably won't. I know it's still early, but is this a good sign? I don't want to overdo the LC, but at the same time I want her to come back on her own. Thoughts on this so far? Are there any other signs that she may want to try again without actually saying the words?
smudge21 Posted March 18, 2011 Posted March 18, 2011 Ha, at least you get personal texts - my ex does this thing of sending random stuff, just to see if I respond. This week it was a joke - a simple joke. She's never sent them before and it was clear she was seeing if I'd respond. I'm on full nc, so not going to. As for your situation. You want her back obviously. She is texting you more than you're texting her but it's still hard to say what's going on in her head. I think you know her better than any of us, so what do you feel like doing now? You're basically playing a game now - giving her the cold sholder, winding her up, teasing. Sadly there's no fixed rules for this game, so whatever you do could have a different outcome. Without knowing much about it, I'd take a stab and say reply back with either something basic like "sorry, was just busy" or maybe turn it into something amusing like "is it okay if I text back 4 hours later?". Like I said, it's a game you're playing and you shouldn't try to anticipate the outcome. Try to think what you really want out of this. Why did you two split up? Do you really want her back after what happened? Good luck with it.
BlindRage Posted March 18, 2011 Posted March 18, 2011 If she was the one that dumped you ignore her ass. She's just an attention seeking girl that once you give it to her she will thrive on it and ignore YOU. She's a bitch forget about her.
complicationsinlove Posted March 18, 2011 Posted March 18, 2011 So is this the game that you guys play? I wonder if my ex is playing the same game, and if you two are hanging out. LMBO! I say keep it up, if your trying to piss her off or keep her thinking, because it is workig. But, if you do love her don't do it for to much longer. It might push her away after a while, because she is going to think you moved on and give up ;D
betterdeal Posted March 18, 2011 Posted March 18, 2011 How about resolving to only communicate with your mouth? If you want to speak to her, speak to her, either face to face or by phone. Otherwise, nothing. See how that goes. If you can't bring yourself to actually speak with her, doesn't that say something about what you really feel about her?
Rose T Posted March 18, 2011 Posted March 18, 2011 If I was you and you want to 'communicate' more powerfully with your silence, I'd tell her / send her a final message saying that you want space seeing as you're not together any more, and try to let her know that she should only get in touch if she wants to get back together. I don't think that this game playing will help even though it's irritating her at the moment.
betterdeal Posted March 18, 2011 Posted March 18, 2011 Yes, deliberately hurting someone you love doesn't make much sense.
radiodarcy Posted March 18, 2011 Posted March 18, 2011 If I was you and you want to 'communicate' more powerfully with your silence, I'd tell her / send her a final message saying that you want space seeing as you're not together any more, and try to let her know that she should only get in touch if she wants to get back together. I don't think that this game playing will help even though it's irritating her at the moment. agreed. sooner or she's going to tire of the game and give up. it's better to just be up front and send her the final message like Rose suggested. chances are she'll respect you more for it.
Author lawwal Posted March 18, 2011 Author Posted March 18, 2011 It's been about two months since the BU. The only reason she gave was that she thought we weren't a match. But I think she's just confused and maybe needed some time to figure things out. The first month we didn't see much of each other since I was still in crazy mode. The second month we actually spent a lot of time together and it seemed like we were dating again, but in her mind, i don't think we were since she wasn't looking for a relationship. So, I actually did try to send her a message to not contact me unless she wanted to try again, but.....I didn't write it correctly and basically it ended up saying...Please don't contact me anymore. lol! So I got the defriend from FB about a week ago. Anywho, I'm only playing this game now because she ignored one of my texts the other day and we always respond really quick to each other's texts. But even after all the stuff I did wrong after the BU, she's still here....is she really just attention seeking or what?! So confusing
Author lawwal Posted March 18, 2011 Author Posted March 18, 2011 Has anybody ever gotten back with an ex by still responding to the breadcrumbs, hung out, been intimate or FWB, played it cool, and have her want to give it another try?
radiodarcy Posted March 18, 2011 Posted March 18, 2011 Has anybody ever gotten back with an ex by still responding to the breadcrumbs, hung out, been intimate or FWB, played it cool, and have her want to give it another try? i can't speak for anyone else. but i responded to his breadcrumbs. we talked for about three weeks. then he said he really wanted a girlfriend and decided to do online dating - - again. i was and still am crushed. but i went back on NC and have been there for ten days. so "no" it did not work for me.
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