Heartbroken30 Posted March 16, 2011 Posted March 16, 2011 So I just met up with my ex bf who broke up with me almost 2 months ago. We were NC for about a month till recently we wanted to give back some of our stuff. I just got back from our meeting. I wasn't sure how it was going to go as he was pretty cold with me through the break up. But suprisingly things went well. We met at Chapters and were only supposed to look for a book for me and exchange our stuff and that's it but he wanted to go and have a bite to eat afterwards. So we did. I did not bring up the break up at all. Whatsoever. He asked me how things have been and if anything new has happened and I asked him the same. He was not the cold person that he was through texts with me anymore. I made sure to look my best and look and feel happy and I definitely saw him checking me out a couple times! My questions is: What do I do now? I don't text him right after our meeting right? I wait for him to text me? I think the meeting went very well...even though we gave our stuff back to each other. We had a few good laughs. Just not really sure what to do now...given I really do want him back especially now after seeing him :-( Any advice is appreciated....
Rose T Posted March 16, 2011 Posted March 16, 2011 Hi Heartbroken. Glad that wasn't too stressful for you. Now... play it cool. The situation's as before, he walked away from your relationship, so he has to make a move, if anyone will. You did the right thing today, didn't talk about the past relationship, looked hot - so you've done all you can for now. Couple of things, though - he let you down before and it sounds like you're starting to heal. So, as they say... watch what you wish for. Also, I imagine you feel pretty good at the moment after the fun evening, but be prepared for a down in the next couple of days if he doesn't get in touch or doesn't contact you in the way you want. Remember, this is also par for the course with this guy. He has let you down in the past, so guard your heart and try to focus on your own needs, as always.
depplover_1980 Posted March 17, 2011 Posted March 17, 2011 There is a strong chance you will not hear from him again; you have no idea what else he has going on right now and he might have a handful of ladies on call. Yes he would be lovely to your face and yes he will still find you attractive, but it does not mean he will be back. I am sorry to be so honest but you need it.
Anna86 Posted March 17, 2011 Posted March 17, 2011 Hi Heart broken!! Well, I went through a very similar situation last week. I also collected my stuff 2 months after the break up. If you read my posts you will see I was left high and dry. If I were you, I would 100percent wait for him to contact you. I know my ex was really warm towards me and we had fun but it didn't lead to him wanting me back again. I guess many people can just be friends with an ex. If you have feelings for him, I would suggest not texting or calling him. I know its hard but this is advice I wish I followed!! I agree with Rose, U seem like you have healed a lot....I hope you can continue this. Good luck
Author Heartbroken30 Posted March 17, 2011 Author Posted March 17, 2011 I kind of got the idea that he was leaving the ball in my court sort of thing. I am taking a career test next month and he wished me good luck and to keep him posted. I definitely can not see him NEVER contacting me again. And yes I definitely was about 85 % healed but this meeting took me back a bit now...I now realized how much I really do miss him :-( We did reminisce about a couple things when we were together....so that was refreshing especially since he pointed it out. I know I shouldn't contact him and wait for him...hopefully he will remember us in a good way after this meeting. And at the least make him think. But I will stick to NC as I don't want him to think I am needy and desperate...I want him to think the good thoughts from this meeting.
depplover_1980 Posted March 17, 2011 Posted March 17, 2011 I kind of got the idea that he was leaving the ball in my court sort of thing. I am taking a career test next month and he wished me good luck and to keep him posted. I definitely can not see him NEVER contacting me again. And yes I definitely was about 85 % healed but this meeting took me back a bit now...I now realized how much I really do miss him :-( We did reminisce about a couple things when we were together....so that was refreshing especially since he pointed it out. I know I shouldn't contact him and wait for him...hopefully he will remember us in a good way after this meeting. And at the least make him think. But I will stick to NC as I don't want him to think I am needy and desperate...I want him to think the good thoughts from this meeting. Sorry I don't mean literally never again, but certainly not in the manner you want him to - yes he may send you a message in a couple of weeks to see how you're doing. But if you chase him, you will yet again push him away and you'll put yourself in a worse position. You had the willpower to do it before and you can do it again. He can only come to you i'm afraid and then you must be super careful how you play. It's all one big game.
Author Heartbroken30 Posted March 17, 2011 Author Posted March 17, 2011 Yes I know it's all a game...i hate these games! lol I just want to tell him that I think he looked really good tonight....but I know I shouldn't! grrr! Soo frustrating. I have done really well with NC the past month and almost came to the point where I didn't have a need to contact him at all. And now this...*sigh*
depplover_1980 Posted March 17, 2011 Posted March 17, 2011 Yes I know it's all a game...i hate these games! lol I just want to tell him that I think he looked really good tonight....but I know I shouldn't! grrr! Soo frustrating. I have done really well with NC the past month and almost came to the point where I didn't have a need to contact him at all. And now this...*sigh* I know babe, it is so frustrating - you just wanna pin him down and **** his brains out, I GET IT!! Hey you honestly will get back to where you were and quicker this time because you know the way there now.
sweetblubrry Posted March 17, 2011 Posted March 17, 2011 This same thing happened to me! I last saw my ex 3 weeks ago at work and he was being all warm, friendly, and flirty toward me. And then absolutely nothing since then... what the heck? I know he will talk to me again I just don't know when. I just don't get it... I swear its all a game.
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