dreamer0123 Posted March 16, 2011 Posted March 16, 2011 Hi So I met this guy on the internet- about a month ago. We chatted for about 2 weeks before actually meeting. Oddly enough- we had so many similarities and strong connection. He even mentioned he normally isn't a phone person but with me- he fely super comfortable.. we had a good connection that I think initially threw us both off! So when we first met in person- the chemistry was there- and since that the last month has been pretty good- we are always in touch (everyday)- get together for dinners and stuff- gone on a few dates- and he kept on bringing up future plans like travelling together and stuff... things were starting to heat up physically as well but we never slept together. The last few days things have been "off" and last night he told me that he felt like things got too serious too soon and wanted to slow down. He also told me he had been talking to someone else but she was away for the last couple of weeks and he has no intentions on meeting her. I was surprised but I told him I felt the same way too initally and was not expecting this but at the same time we are older (him 31, me 30)- so we aren't the same people we would have been. We weren't sure how to slow down- I suggested we just date- him just friends- stay in touch and maybe lay off on the physical stuff... we are meeting in a couple of days for dinner to talk again and stuff (we initially had plans on Friday) So - I don't know how to approach this- I mean I feel like we have such a strong connection (and I think he does as well) but at the same time how stong is it that he would want to break it? He is the one who kept making plans for the future (like travelling, getting together etc), he came with me to buy a car, came over when I was sick, I wasn't asking him or telling him too- it was all him.. and now this... I did appreciate his honestly though (and I told him) and I also told him that I don't want to convince him to date me because there is no point if he's not into it. At the same time- I think we have a strong connection that I think would be crazy to loose So how do I approach this- the only thing I am doing isn't calling him today (which will be the first time we haven't spoken to each other in a month)- and we are taking some time to think about it (until Friday)... I'm just so lost.. so any advice or insight would be helpful Thanks a ton!
trios Posted March 16, 2011 Posted March 16, 2011 This just recently happened to me....we talked for 2 months and then all of a sudden he started going thru baby momma drama and totally forgot about me...i was totally hurt because at this point we were really good friends or so i thought....i told him i would be there for him if he even needed anything....Still no text or calls. finally my last ditch i let him know i was gonna be in the area and would like to take him lunch at his place of business...figuring there is no drama there...he flat out told me no he is not working that day...talk about being hurt....what would it take to say...I am off work but lests meet for dinner.....he couldnt even give me that much respect.....I tect him and told him that i got the hint and told him that i wish him luck in whatever he does and thankewd him for the good times that we have had.....he stated that he is going thru alot and does want to spend time with me....but its hard right now...i understand and told him i did not want to end on a bad note....he then said it was to late....i never heard from him again....Guess i didnt mean that much to him huh? Just be careful with whatever you do.....go with your heart and try and play it cool....good luck....oh yeah by the way i am still feeling very blue.....
Author dreamer0123 Posted March 16, 2011 Author Posted March 16, 2011 Oh no:( i'm sorry to hear that. Sometimes I can't help but to wonder why guys freak themselves out? Without really explanation? Maybe your guy really has a lot on his place- and needs some space to sort things out (not that I don't agree with you at least being there for him)- but i'm not sure... It's hard not to overthink any situation- I know I'm doing the same.
Author dreamer0123 Posted March 16, 2011 Author Posted March 16, 2011 But that's the funny thing.. He messaged me way back in Dec- and I was so turned off internet dating- I just deleted the message that comes to your inbox- I didn't get back to him until Feb- We spoke/texted/met up all this month- and he was soo into it- he actually freaked me out because I thought it was too soon too fast. The last two weeks- we saw each other 5-6 times! The thing that bothers me- is that he was making all these plans (and telling me about them) in person or on the phone. He wanted to travel with me, go to my friends wedding in the fall, plan a party with him- all this kind of stuff. I didn't bring up squat. I played off his energy.... to be honest he did scare himself I think-but still He came with me to buy my car- that was our "second"date- no wait- our second date was him coming over to take care of me because i was sick. I'm so lost!!!
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