Stilicho Posted March 16, 2011 Posted March 16, 2011 so, a little less than 3 months ago, i broke up with my ex girlfriend, which you can read about here http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t258518/ since the beginning of february, my ex has made attempts to contact me, and after a while, i gave in in order to avoid constant awkwardness(which broke 1 month of NC), as we go to college together and share classes. the contact on her end went from small talk, to joking, to flirting, to acting just like when we were together, from constant touching, bringing me food and drinks, asking to hang out, calling/texting, leaving notes on my car, etc. Thing is, she is still with the new guy, in spite of sending major mixed signals. everything she does, makes me feel like shes trying to win me back, and even though ive told her to not talk to me anymore, she persists. basically, i feel ike shes doing everything to keep me interested and attached, without having to take the risk of making a first move or leaving this guy(whom she denigrates around me), or doesnt think im interested. now, i feel deep down, that the only way it would work, is if she was truly regretful and 100% focused, and i dont think she has the will power to be, so i doubt reconciliation. on the other hand, staying in touch with her has made me realize that i still have feelings for her and deeply care for her, and would kind of like to give it another go. but, im tired of these games shes playing(Calling me whenever shes not around her new bf, cutting classes to hang out with me on campus, etc) so, in effect, im asking if i should keep LC with her, in order to give it another go around, or should i just go full NC and take the power back and put her in the past? anybody else have a g.i.g.s ex try to come back or make moves towards it? what should i do?
Olivexx Posted March 16, 2011 Posted March 16, 2011 She is with someone else and is still trying to act like you are together. She is trying so hard to keep you around. Why? An ego boost maybe. Or either you or the other guy is a back up plan if one of you reject her. I had a friend just like this. She would break up with guys and just keep them around for an ego boost. She would brag to all of her girlfriends about how all of her exes are still "in love" with her. My advice? Just go full NC. Why? She's playing these games. She doesn't want to get back together with you yet. If she honestly wanted to be with you and make it work, she would drop everyone and make YOU her main focus. You know this deep down inside. But you still want some sort of hope that she may be sincere about her feelings for you...You still care about her. But it's not fair for you to do whatever she wants you to do. There's a wonderful thing about NC. It gives you the opportunity to move on or just reflect about what you want. And it will also give her time to see what she is missing and if she really wants another go around with you, she will realize what she needs to do to get you back.
Author Stilicho Posted March 16, 2011 Author Posted March 16, 2011 thanks olivexx, thats pretty much an echo of my sentiments about this, and thats why i plan to tell her to go NC, unless people can convince me otherwise(as it looks like this is getting her to come to me), but i am no second option. I treated her like a princess, and in return, she threw me to the trash, and is now making attempts to come back, or keep me around. idk, well see....
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